


Love on the Brain

by perfeggso



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2018-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-28 17:09:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 37,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11422419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perfeggso/pseuds/perfeggso
Summary: Just some cute chanbaek fluff with angst and smut on the side.  Sort of a college + CEO au thingy.  I hope y'all enjoy!TBH it kinda jumps around a lot in the timeline so don't be alarmed also I changed the ages a little and added some made-up characters. That is all :)





	1. Chapter 1

[1]  
Baekhyun awoke with his arms sprawled out in front of him, the right of which he could hardly feel save a muted tingling which ran through it and numbed his skin. The mattress was soft and silky and shaped to his body. Through his light brown bangs, he could see a hazy blue light. It must have been mid-morning, and the wall he was facing in this room seemed to be made of glass although Baekhyun could see nothing clearly.

  
He stirred gingerly and tried to hold himself up with the tingling arm, which quaked under his weight but did the job until he was sitting with his legs over the edge of the bed and had moved enough of his bangs out of the way to be able to tell that the wall was in fact made of glass. It was a floor-to-ceiling window and from it, Baekhyun watched the shiny, shadowy shape of downtown Seoul sprawl beneath him as if he were in an airplane. Shipping boats in the Han River, cars in the street, and people on the sidewalks below all looked like the plastic replicas he had as toys when he was young. Although the city as Baekhyun knew it was always filled with a cacophony of competing noises, from this height it had a muted quality to it like a field covered in fresh snow.

  
Baekhyun closed his eyes and breathed a soft sigh. His grogginess had subsided significantly and he knew where he was now. This was Chanyeol’s room. To his left, Baekhyun recognized the familiar pile of battered luggage and half-closed cardboard boxes he had brought with him last night. Right, he thought, I live here now. He could still hardly believe it. Baekhyun massaged his fingers and shook out his right arm to dispel the dregs of pins and needles and wondered to himself how long Chanyeol had been awake and how he had managed to get up without disturbing his bedmate. Baekhyun was sure he had fallen asleep on the larger man’s chest and he wasn’t one to move much throughout the night.

  
Baekhyun yawned, loudly enough that the sound reverberated around the stark edges of the room and was amplified back at him. He found this startling, and covered his mouth sheepishly in response. That would never have happened in his dorm room. After a few seconds, a new sound – footsteps – came from outside the bedroom door and Baekhyun turned his head behind him to greet the squeal of the door’s hinges as it swung open. Chanyeol poked his head in almost horizontally, his dark brown hair completely loose in shaggy bangs which grazed his circular, wire-rimmed glasses. Baekhyun couldn’t help but giggle at the stupid grin pasted over his boyfriend’s face.

  
“Good morning, sleepyhead,” said Chanyeol through his grin, walking all the way through the door and padding over to the edge of the bed to sit next to Baekhyun. He wore a sunny yellow sweatshirt and jeans with holes in the knees. When he sat down on the bed, Chanyeol put his arms around the younger man and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

  
“What time is it?” asked Baekhyun.

  
“10:30,” replied Chanyeol.

“Aigoo, why’d you let me sleep so late??” asked Baekhyun, trying to convey some kind of annoyed shock on his face but only managing to make Chanyeol laugh. Chanyeol ruffled a hand through Baekhyun’s hair.

“You looked like you needed rest. I figured I’d let my boy have his beauty sleep,” explained Chanyeol with an exaggerated pout, “please don’t be mad at me.”

Baekhyun narrowed his eyes at his boyfriend and flicked the taller man’s nose with a finger. “Fine. You’re forgiven,” he said, stretching his arms up like a cat until they extended into crooked lightning bolt shapes. Chanyeol chuckled and tucked his head into the curve made by Baekhyun’s chin, neck, and shoulder.

“I’m glad you could find it in your heart.”

When Baekhyun set his arms back down on his knees, Chanyeol absentmindedly began rubbing his thumb gently over the scars on Baekhyun’s right wrist. The first time Chanyeol had noticed these, Baekhyun had flinched away, consumed by shame, but now the touch was more of a comfort. Sweetly, Chanyeol held tight to the delusion that his kisses on the pale, raised lines could heal them. Baekhyun kept his eyes trained out the window, his trademark puppy-like pout fixing itself to his lips. Chanyeol raised an eyebrow in inquisition.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about, baby?” he asked. Baekhyun breathed a laugh and looked sideways and down to meet Chanyeol’s gaze.

“I just…I’m still processing all this. Living here with you. It just seems too good to be true.”

Chanyeol looked out the window too. To him, this view was something he had to force himself to appreciate; it had become so common.

“I promise you it’s not. And it can only get better.” He squeezed Baekhyun’s delicate hand. “I love you, baby,” he added, his low, syrupy voice getting muffled by the fabric of Baekhyun’s pajama shirt on his shoulder. Baekhyun smiled at his luck.

“I love you too.”

“Now,” said Chanyeol, hopping to his feet more gracefully than usual and offering his boyfriend his hands, “I haven’t eaten yet since I was waiting for you and I have the day off, so I was thinking we’d make matcha crepes. I can make them without a recipe and you can cook them if you want. How does that sound?”

“Perfect,” said Baekhyun as he took Chanyeol’s hands and stood himself up, the blood draining from his head and making him dizzy.

“Whoa there,” said Chanyeol, steadying Baekhyun, “you really need to eat. Do you want to change or stay in pajamas?”

“I’ll change later.”

“Okay. And we can unpack all your stuff after breakfast.”

With that, Baekhyun turned from his new serene view and followed his boyfriend to the kitchen like a koala clinging to a tree, eliciting protests (“you’re going to trip me, Baek!”) the whole way.


	2. Chapter 2

Minseok was the first person Baekhyun told about his relationship with Chanyeol.  It was a Saturday during the final months of college, so they had no classes, and they were sitting at a round marble table in the window corner of their favorite café, waiting for their other friends, who were late as usual.  Baekhyun was sipping taro bubble tea through a fat, turf-green straw while Minseok drank an americano from an elegant espresso cup, their separate tastes in beverages giving away their difference in age.  Minseok was the oldest of Baekhyun’s close friends who, at twenty-six years old, was beginning his PhD in music theory at the University of Seoul.  He and Baekhyun had met when Baekhyun was a second year music major and Minseok, then a Master’s student, was assigned to be his piano tutor.  Anyway, the two were usually the only ones in their group who could be trusted to be on-time.  

Minseok raised his eyebrows in gleeful surprise as he blew on the steaming dark liquid he had ordered.

“You mean to tell me that you’ve scored a hot, young sugar daddy,  _ and  _ he has a personality???  I must say I’m impressed, Byun Baekhyun; you’re luckier than I.”   

Baekhyun just shrugged smugly in response while sipping his tea.  “What can I say?”

“So,” continued Minseok, “those crates you see in the harbor – the ones with ‘Park’ on them – he’s  _ that _ Park family?  He’s the heir?”

Baekhyun flashed his rectangular smile and nodded.  “Mm, hm.”

“Jesus, Baek.  He must be loaded.”

“You should see his apartment!”

Minseok chuckled and took a long sip of his coffee.  “So how’d this happen?”

“You know, contrary to popular belief,” replied Baekhyun, “I can be quite charming.”

“Right,” said Minseok, “you have tapioca stuck in your teeth.” 

“Oh shit,” muttered Baekhyun, scowling and unceremoniously launching his fingers into his mouth.  Minseok, deciding to show as little attachment as possible to the horror of manners across from him, gazed out the café window.  Perhaps, he thought, people-watching would make his friends appear faster in the hustle of pedestrians.  It did not.

It was early March and the city was just beginning to emerge from the frost of Seoul’s depressing winter months.  Coats were transitioning from mohair and down to cotton, denim, and thin Gor Tex.  Buds of plant-life sprouted, hesitant, from trees and bushes in chartreus, and cherry trees were starting to bloom their frothy petals.  The sun glared harsh against the window and cut the pale blue sky and brisk air.  To Minseok, it looked like new life. 

He turned back to his table-mate, who had transitioned into a much more decorous mode of sitting. 

“Baek, does he know about…you know…everything you’ve been through this last year?”

Minseok could see that, at his words, something dark clouded his friend’s face, but he needed to know.  As a mentor to Baekhyun, he had been an important confidante and source of stability throughout the whole ordeal. 

Baekhyun looked below the wire rim of his glasses at his tea and swirled the liquid absentmindedly counterclockwise.  Then he forced his chin up and gave his friend a fleeting, pinched smile. 

“Yes.  He knows.”

“Everything?”

“Everything,” Baekhyun confirmed. 

“That’s good,” remarked Minseok, nodding at his coffee cup, “and he’s not weird about it?”

“Of course he’s not weird about it,” Baekhyun scoffed, “if he was I wouldn’t be dating him.” 

Minseok chuckled at Baekhyun’s hard-set pout.  “I understand.  But, you know, some people aren’t equipped to handle those sorts of things, and it’s best you know who those people are so you can give them the opportunity to removed themselves from situations they likely don’t want to be involved in.  I just want what’s best for you, Baek.” 

Baekhyun breathed a laugh and took another sip of his drink.  “Okay, Dr. Kim.  I appreciate it.”    

Behind Minseok, the creaky wooden door of the café sprung open, causing the bells tied around its handle to jingle.  Through the door walked a group of Minseok’s closest friends; Kris, a Chinese exchange student by way of Canada; Luhan and Zitao, two more Chinese exchange students, and Jongdae, the only Korean in the group.  

As soon as he got inside, Jongdae opted to screech in lieu of a proper greeting for the two already seated.  He was a fourth year classical singing major, which meant he was an expert in projecting his voice much to the chagrin of whoever was caught in his vicinity.  Baekhyun often joked that Jongdae was like lightening; you could estimate how far away he was by the lag in his thunderous voice.  Kris towered over the table and surveyed it quizzically while adjusting his plaid hunting cap.  Baekhyun laughed like machine-gun fire, managing even to startle himself. 

“Nice hat, hyung” he said jokingly, to which Kris responded with flat and oblivious thanks.  Zitao elbowed his way into the seat next to Baekhyun. 

“Kris, everything good?” inquired Baekhyun. 

“Yeah,” Kris replied, “I think we need a bigger table.”

“There are no bigger tables,” whined Zitao in his husky, grey voice, “Kris, won’t you buy something for me?”  Before the man in question could respond, Luhan jumped onto Minseok’s lap. 

“We can conserve space!” said Luhan with a smile which was echoed by Minseok after a brief moment of shock.  Jongdae sighed and looked out the window. 

“ _ Wo de tian ah! _  Will you two stop it?” snapped Zitao at the cuddle-puddle across from him, then swiftly returning his attention to mooching off his friend. “Kriiissss, please.” 

Baekhyun scrunched his face up small.  “Aigo, stop breathing on me!” he demanded, leaning towards the window, “did you just smoke?  You’re going to give me cancer!” 

Zitao threw a sharp glare Baekhyun’s way and made a ring-clad fist.  “Bitch.”

Baekhyun erupted into laughter and an exasperated Zitao returned once more to bothering Kris.  Baekhyun enjoyed messing with the diva-ish third year music major. 

“Yo, Zitao, what do you want?” asked Kris, looking through his wallet.  Zitao made his face into that of a spoiled child and requested one plain oolong tea in a voice like he’d folded it up small.  This was followed by a perfect replication of the request from Baekhyun, who opted to accompany it with a flirty facial expression.  Zitao might just have busted out his martial arts skills on Baekhyun if thunder hadn’t struck.  

“Eeeeeehhhh!” interrupted Jongdae, who was still looking out the window.  His outburst grabbed the attention of everyone around the table as well as several other tables, the baristas, and Kris, who was in line buying drinks and trying to dissociate.  Everyone shifted their gaze in the same direction as Jongdae, to find Junmyeon, Sehun, Jongin, and Kyungsoo crossing the street and approaching the café.  Sehun looked like he had just been forced to wake up despite it being nearly one in the afternoon, and Kyungsoo was clinging to the side of Jongin’s jacket.  You see, nearly all of Baekhyun’s friends were also queer.  He found that birds of a feather really did flock together naturally, and those who had missed the flock got incorporated through the LGBT alliance club. 

The remaining four entered the café, headed by Junmyeon.  He approached the table slowly, looking around with cautious eyes, the other three in tow. 

“Why is everyone staring at us?” asked Junmyeon in a hushed voice, “it’s like we’re famous.”

“Well,” explained Baekhyun, using his beverage to gesture towards Jongdae, “there was a thunder storm.” 

Sehun, who hadn’t seemed to be paying attention to anything so far, suddenly perked up.

“Is that bubble tea???” and before Baekhyun could answer, Sehun was striding intently towards the line to order. 

Kyungsoo tugged Jongin’s sleeve.  “What do you want?” he asked his boyfriend.  Jongin, who had a face sharper than Zitao’s rings and a personality softer than his dogs, looked sweetly and vaguely at the table and Minseok’s coffee cup.  Finally, he responded:

“Ah, no coffee for me, thank you.” 

Kyungsoo looked a little frustrated.  “They have other things,” he assured. 

“Ah, okay,” responded Jongin, “let’s go look, then.”  And with that, the couple followed Sehun, who was just placing his order. 

Baekhyun sipped his tea quietly.  This kind of barely-strung-together dysfunction was exactly what he had come to expect from, and love about, his friends.  No one ever really knew what they were doing.  It was a miracle they could communicate well enough to all meet at one place at more or less the same time.  

Baekhyun was famously loud when he opened his mouth around his friends, but sometimes he liked to test how invisible he could make himself. 

Kris had come back with tea for Zitao and coffee for himself, and was squeezed next to his dependent.  Luhan was still on top of Minseok, Jongdae had smooshed against the window and was teasing Sehun about something, and Junmyeon was still standing and discussing his Master’s thesis with Minseok. 

When Jongin and Kyungsoo returned with their drinks, Minseok took his spoon and rattled Baekhyun out of his observational comfort with three taps against his coffee cup.  Everyone else also started to attention.

“Everyone, Baekhyun-ah has some exciting news he wants to share with everyone!” began Minseok.  Baekhyun laughed and looked around at his expectant friends. 

“Haha, I do?” he asked.  Minseok continued:

“There has been a recent development in his love-life!”

Baekhyun’s eyes bulged in embarrassment.  “Oh, that’s what we’re announcing?”

“Yes!”

“Why?”

“Because they’ll be interested!” said Minseok as if it should have been obvious. 

“Okay,” began Baekhyun, clearing his throat, “well – wait, where’s Yixing?”

Everyone looked around. 

“Huh, right,” said Kris, looking at his phone, “he said he was coming.”  And as if on cue, Yixing sprang through the door in a huff and everyone wheeled around towards him.

“I’m so sorry!” he said between breaths, “I stayed up late last night writing a paper and slept through my alarm!”

Junmyeon clapped him on the back.  “Poor guy!  Well you’re here now, and just in time for Baek’s announcement!”

Yixing regarded Baekhyun in surprise.  “Baekhyun-ah, really?  Well go ahead!”

Baekhyun took a deep breath and restarted. 

“As I was saying, I met a guy.”

“And,” prodded Minseok.

“He’s really hot, and tall – that’s important.”  Minseok gave him the look that said ‘you idiot,’ so he kept going, “and it’s very serious.  Uh, and he’s also a multi-millionaire…”

Sehun spluttered his tea all over himself, Zitao’s eyebrows raised off his head, Kris’ face contorted into a deeply confused knot, and Jongdae just about yelped.  Everyone left just stared, slack-jawed, save Minseok, of course, who wore a self-satisfied smirk. 

Kyungsoo was the first to speak.  He pointed a finger across the table and gulped.  “This hyung???”

“I’m sorry, I don’t follow,” admitted Yixing, “how’d  _ that _ happen?”

Baekhyun shrugged.  “He saw me sing at a gig and asked me out.  No big deal.”

Junmyeon went into mom-mode.  “Well, what’s he like?  Can we meet him?”

Kyungsoo piped up again.  “I bet I won’t like him.”

“Why?” asked Baekhyun, indignant.

Kyungsoo explained, “because you picked him.  Also he’s tall.”

“Okay, fine,” said Baekhyun curtly, “anyway I’m sure you guys could meet him.  His name is Chanyeol.  Park Chanyeol.  He’s twenty-five and the heir to the Park shipping fortune.  But he’s super down-to-earth and caring.”

Jongdae spoke.  “You look really in love.”

“Aish, I do?”

“You’re blushing like an idiot,” offered Sehun, who had already finished his bubble tea.  Baekhyun felt his cheeks, and sure enough, they were hot.  He tried to laugh it off.

“Haha, thanks guys.” 

“Hey,” said Yixing, “we’re just glad to see you happy.  Sounds like you’re a lucky guy.” 

Minseok raised his empty coffee cup.  “Here’s to Baekhyun healing and finding himself a sugar daddy!  May we all be so fortunate!” and everyone toasted, some with drinks, some with empty cups, some with fists, and Jongdae with his voice, which was loud enough to rock the boats in the harbor of Zitao’s hometown. 

The celebration did not last long though, because one of the women working at the counter approached the group and told them there had been volume complaints and they were advised to leave the premises.  They slowly filed out of the café and into the broken sunlight, Kris muttering about how they needed a bigger table anyway.  Baekhyun smiled to himself.  He felt like he was getting to start over; new life.  He pulled his phone out of his pocket and texted Chanyeol. 

_ “I told my friends about you.  They say I’m a lucky guy.  I think they’re right <3”  _


	3. Chapter 3

Park Chanyeol was never the type to fall in love easily, nor did he really believe in love at first sight.  These attitudes tended to get him the reputation of a playboy, but that was mostly because he sometimes had trouble committing to other people emotionally and usually opted for hookups.  When he did fall in love, he fell hard and took forever to get out of it.  His parents used to tell him that he’d pursued one boy from kindergarten until he started high school, even though he knew full well by fourth grade or so that the kid wasn’t gay.  He didn’t really remember most of that.

Chanyeol hadn’t expected to fall in love at the mall during Christmastime, but he also hadn’t accounted for Byun Baekhyun.  He had finished work, and was feeling lonely, so instead of going home, he decided to go walk around the fashionable Gangnam mall he frequented as a teenager to look at the giant Christmas tree and pick up some jajangmyeon at his favorite noodle joint.  Every year, the mall hired someone to play carols on the shiny black Steinway grand piano next to the holiday display, but as Chanyeol approached it this time, shivering from the melting snow in his hair, he noticed that whoever had been hired this time around was singing too – and in an absolutely angelic voice.  Chanyeol was drawn to the piano like a dumb-bug to one of the lights strung onto the massive plastic Christmas tree across from the instrument. 

When Chanyeol had finally made his way to the music, he saw that the source of the singing was just as beautiful as his voice.  He sang and played, his eyes closed, and the words to “White Christmas” spilled airily, smooth, and a little metallic but in a golden way, into the microphone.  Chanyeol stood, transfixed.  He didn’t even like Christmas music very much.  All he knew was that he wanted to stay there forever. 

The man at the piano was short and slight, with light brown hair which fell over his forehead.  His face was smooth and arched down into a pointed chin with soft orbs of cheeks.  Chanyeol noticed a little bronze eyeliner had been applied and he liked the way the man’s eyelids fluttered softly as he sang.  Although he wore an uninspired black suit, Chanyeol still did not think he’d ever seen a prettier boy than this one, nor one who more resembled an angel.  Chanyeol wanted to steal him and put him on top of the Christmas tree.  Chanyeol wanted to kiss him. 

When the song ended, the man at the piano opened his eyes and nodded his head in a bow to the sparse ring of people who had stopped to listen, then locked eyes which Chanyeol, who was just noticing that he’d ended up inside, not included in, the semicircle.  The pianist smiled and Chanyeol felt like someone had set up a campfire in his stomach.  He took a few steps back, but didn’t dare leave. 

Throughout the next song, the singer kept opening his eyes and stealing smiley, teasing glances at Chanyeol.   _That’s it_ , Chanyeol told himself, _I want him_.  And most of the time, what Park Chanyeol wanted, he got. 

Chanyeol sat next to the piano for another half hour or so, waiting for his chance to talk with the singer.  He began almost falling into a warm trance when the man finally stood, closed the hood of the piano, yawned like a cat, and began gathering his things.  Chanyeol came back to reality with a start and bolted to the piano before his target could get away.  Standing next to him, the man seemed even smaller and he looked at Chanyeol with a polite, but startled expression. 

“Hi!” greeted Chanyeol, “Sorry for bothering you.  I’m Park Chanyeol.  Um, are you doing anything right now?”

The man let the edges of his lips pull into so soft grin.  “No.”

“Will you let me buy you dinner?”

***

Baekhyun had noticed the man watching him play.  In fact, it was a little distracting.  He could have sworn he’d seen him at a bar before, but that man had been wearing an oversized purple bomber jacket and had his bangs down, while the man sitting and listening now was clad in sharp, black business attire and wore his hair slicked back.  Still, that was not a face Baekhyun could forget – it was so handsome – and it remained fixed on him every time he snuck a peek to check.  

He was surprised, but not overly so when the man came up to him, introduced himself as Park Chanyeol with a little bow, and offered to buy him dinner.  Baekhyun couldn’t help but smile.  Despite his well-tailored clothes and height, Chanyeol had a very awkward and nervous energy about him.  To Baekhyun, it seemed this was the first time in a while that Chanyeol had actually feared rejection in a situation like this. 

Baekhyun accepted the invitation, introduced himself, and followed Chanyeol to a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant stuck in a seemingly forgotten corner of the mall.  It smelled like oil.  When they got a table, Baekhyun folded his hands on it. 

“So, is this, like, a date?” he asked.  Chanyeol smiled.

“I mean, that was what I was going for…”

Baekhyun cursed himself in his head.  He could feel a blush spreading over his face. 

“Okay,” he began, curious, “how did you know I was gay, then?”

“Just a hunch,” smirked Chanyeol with a shrug. 

“Oh god, it’s that obvious?” giggled Baekhyun, covering his face with his hands.  “You know how I knew you were?”

“How?” inquired Chanyeol.

“I saw you at a gay bar once.”

Chanyeol raised an eyebrow.  “Really? I’d totally believe that, actually.  You didn’t want to come talk to me?”

“No,” said Baekhyun, “admittedly you are very handsome, but I was dating someone.”

“Ah.”  Chanyeol fidgeted with his collar.

“It’s over now though, thank god,” said Baekhyun. 

“Ah,” repeated Chanyeol, “ended badly?”

Chanyeol thought Baekhyun looked on the verge of tears.  “Yeah.  Very.” 

“I’m sorry,” muttered Chanyeol, feeling guilt pool suddenly in his stomach.  Baekhyun immediately jolted into a smile.

“Don’t be!  I’m so glad it’s over and I get to go on dates with charming men like you.  So, what’s up with the outfit?  You looked really different the other time I saw you.”

“Ah this?” asked Chanyeol, gesturing vaguely downwards, “office job clothes.  You know…”

With that, a waiter with a sesame-oil-splattered white t-shirt and apron approached their table with a pen and paper but neither Baekhyun nor Chanyeol had even glanced at the menu.  Chanyeol ordered jajangmyeon.

“Ah, I love jajangmyeon!” Baekhyun remarked, flipping through the menu but not really reading it, “I’ll get that too.”

“So,” started Chanyeol once the waiter had left, “are you a full-time musician?”

“I guess so,” said Baekhyun, “I’m finishing my music degree at U of Seoul.  I’d like to be a music teacher.”

“Oh wow, what instruments do you play?” asked Chanyeol, taking a sip from his cafeteria-style water cup.

Baekhyun answered automatically, “piano, guitar, and violin.”

“I also play guitar!” said Chanyeol in excitement.  “You’re probably a lot better than me though.”

Baekhyun didn’t know what to say to that, so he just let out a pinched chuckle, adding, “I’d also love to give voice lessons.”

“I bet you’d be great!” said Chanyeol “You have a beautiful voice.”  Chanyeol smiled across the table and Baekhyun felt the heat planting itself under his cheeks again. 

The food came and Baekhyun enjoyed it thoroughly; he hadn’t realized how hungry he was.  It definitely beat dorm food.  When the check came, Chanyeol payed even though Baekhyun offered to cover his half, then Chanyeol offered to drive Baekhyun back to his dorm.  To Chanyeol’s surprise, Baekhyun refused, looking spooked for the first time all night.  He said he did not want to be a burden, but Chanyeol insisted, saying he didn’t want Baekhyun to have to waste money on a cab.  Still, Baekhyun shut him down.

“No, really, I can’t.  I’m sorry.  That’s really kind of you.”  Chanyeol decided not to press him further.  Perhaps, he thought, the offer had been a bit selfish.  Maybe he would have gotten distracted driving while staring at Baekhyun’s profile beside him and they would have crashed.  Maybe this was for the best. 

“Okay,” he resigned, “at least let me walk you to a cab?” 

It was snowy and dark outside.  Puffy, wet snowflakes skittered back and forth in the air as if they were running quickly down invisible miniature flights of stairs.  They turned the color of hard candies in the neon signs of the Gangnam District. 

The two men waited under the glass awning of the mall entrance, standing shoulder to shoulder – or so to speak, Baekhyun’s shoulders only came up to Chanyeol’s mid-arm. 

“Can I see you again?” asked Chanyeol. 

“Of course,” confirmed Baekhyun with a smile, “here, give me your number – I’ll text you.”

Chanyeol hailed a cab and took Baekhyun’s long, elegant hand in his (which he thought looked ogre-ish in comparison) and kissed Baekhyun’s knuckles.  He noticed a mole under the nail on Baekhyun’s thumb.  Unique hands, indeed. 

“See you later,” said Chanyeol.

“See you,” replied Baekhyun with a soft-cheeked smile, and with that, he turned and got into the cab. 

As Chanyeol walked back to his car, his head felt like a balancing act and the flames in his stomach began licking his chin, warming him in the frostbitten air. 


	4. Chapter 4

This wouldn’t be the first time Baekhyun’s parents would meet Chanyeol – that was at his graduation – but it would be  _ the _ time - the classic family audition for the significant other.  It was mid-June, a few weeks after the first day Baekhyun had woken up as a tenant in Chanyeol’s penthouse, and the couple was invited over to the Byun residence for dinner. 

Baekhyun stood in front of the mirror, anxiously buttoning and unbuttoning the brown blazer Chanyeol had bought him.  He wasn’t worried about bringing a man home – his parents had always been almost as accepting of his homosexuality as he could have hoped (sure, his dad acted a bit cold to his boyfriends sometimes, but that was really just because he had the traditional attitude of someone with a dating daughter rather than a dating son) – but what made Baekhyun anxious was the whole combination of everything else.  He thought his parents might feel uncomfortable dealing with someone from such an upper echelon of wealth; he thought his parents would be overly worried about his ability to pick a partner after what happened with the last one; and most of all, Baekhyun could not imagine how he would feel if his parents for some reason just didn’t like Chanyeol. 

Chanyeol, who had his hair in professional-mode and wore a blue sweater with a jacket (“I think this will make a good impression?”) was crossing the room behind Baekhyun to find his watch when he noticed his boyfriend’s nervous little exercise in the mirror.  He came up behind Baekhyun and brought his hands down on the shorter man’s shoulders as he pressed a kiss to the crown of Baekhyun’s head. 

“Hey,” Baekhyun said airily with a smile.  Chanyeol locked eyes with Baekhyun in the mirror and nuzzled his head into the hollow of Baekhyun’s neck and shoulder. 

“Are you worried, baby?” 

“I think so.  A little.  I really shouldn’t be,” said Baekhyun.

Chanyeol wrapped his arms around Baekhyun’s waist.  “It’s only natural.  I’m a little nervous myself, but your family seems pretty great.”

Baekhyun smiled and Chanyeol felt the small body relax into his arms.  “Yeah, they are.  Sorry, but my brother can’t be there.  He has some kind of military commitment.  My little sister will be there though.  I’m sorry if you don’t like middle-schoolers.  She’s fourteen.”

“Ha! That’s fine.  I’m great with kids.  What’s her name again?” asked Chanyeol, moving on to search once more for his watch.  

“Hajin,” said Baekhyun.

Chanyeol nodded as he triumphantly retrieved a watch from a box in the closet.  “Hajin.  Great.  Also I think you should leave that unbuttoned.” 

Baekhyun immediately ceased fidgeting with the button on his jacket and looked at himself in the mirror with a proud stance.  Chanyeol finished clasping the watch around his wrist. 

“Okay, baby,” started Chanyeol, “ready to go?”   

***    

Baekhyun took a deep puff of air as he stood on the porch in front of his teal front door in the dimming June air.  Chanyeol squeezed his hand in reassurance.  After a knock, his parents opened the door and welcomed the couple inside with open arms and smiles. 

“Ah, Chanyeol!  So good to see you!” said Mrs. Byun, giving the man a hug.  “Aish, I forgot how tall you are.”  Baekhyun finished embracing his father and turned to see that Chanyeol was squatting and bending himself over a good foot or so to get his arms around his mother.  Baekhyun laughed at the strange spectacle and moved over to hug his mother, with whom he fit considerably better.  Baekhyun was amazingly the tallest member of his family present, so Chanyeol looked more tree than human as he shared a handshake and bow with Mr. Byun and shed his jacket to place on the coatrack.

Suddenly, a thin girl with long hair and bangs came whizzing around the corner. 

“Baekhyun oppaaaaaaa!” 

“Hahaha, hi Hajin!” greeted Baekhyun, hugging his little sister, who had practically pounced on him.  When she released her grip on her brother, she turned to Chanyeol and bowed a little, flashing a crooked-toothed grin. 

“Hi, Chanyeol-ah,” she said. 

“Hello, Hajin,” responded Chanyeol, laughing, “nice to see you again.” 

Mrs. Byun motioned for everyone to fully transition inside.  The Byun family had a very open setup in their home, so the kitchen, living room, and dining room were all really part of one larger room. 

“The food is still cooking,” she said, “so feel free to make yourselves comfortable.  Perhaps Hajin would like to tell you all about her summer so far.” 

Chanyeol bowed in thanks.  “Is there anything we can help with in the kitchen?”

“Ah, no,” said Mrs. Byun, who in all honesty could have used some extra hands, “that’s not necessary.  Enjoy yourselves.” 

So Chanyeol and Baekhyun sat on the couch in the living room, letting Hajin amuse them with pictures of her eighth-grade graduation and trying not to get too distracted by the smell of food coming from just behind them. 

“Hajin,” called Mrs. Byun from over the sink, “ask them about that boy you like.”

“Ooooooh” Baekhyun cooed, poking his sister so that she had to dodge his hands by jerkily folding herself like a collapsible table, “Hajin’s got a crush, huh?”

Hajin rolled her eyes.  “eommaaaaaa!”  

“Just ask!”

Chanyeol laughed his deep-throated laugh and looked around like a man in over his head. 

“Wait, we’re supposed to be the experts here?” he asked in bewilderment as he scrunched his long legs up onto the couch, “I don’t know anything about prepubescent straight boys.  That’s about as confusing as it gets.” 

“Ah, Yeollie,” said Baekhyun with a scolding look, “don’t scare her.”  Baekhyun turned his attention to his sister.  “This boy you like, are you friends with him?”

“Yes.”

Baekhyun considered the evidence and looked earnestly into Hajin’s eyes.  “Then, I would say that the best thing to do would be to pluck up the courage, go up to him, and tell him how you feel.  What’s the worst that could happen?”

“He could want to stop being my friend.”

Baekhyun swiped this possibility away.  “Aigoo, anyone who does that permanently wasn’t worth it in the first place.”

“Actually,” Chanyeol piped up, “I disagree with your brother.”

“Oh, suddenly you are the authority here?” asked Baekhyun sarcastically.

“I say you play hard to get.  Make him realize that when you’re not there, her wishes you were.” 

The Byun siblings looked at Chanyeol with flat expressions.  “That sounds like a terrible idea,” said Baekhyun. 

“You know, Hajin,” Chanyeol began with a smirk, “your brother wouldn’t even take his own advice.  He would definitely be the shy one and I would be driven insane chasing after him.  So basically don’t listen to us.”  After a moment of thought, he added, “but do play hard to get.”

“Ah no!” whispered Baekhyun emphatically, “talk to him!”

“Okay you two,” said Hajin in exasperation, “thanks.  How about you go talk to mom and dad or something.”  Baekhyun and Chanyeol erupted into cackles. 

“Fair enough,” said Baekhyun, standing and ruffling his sister’s hair (“hey! Stop that!) “we’ll give you a break.”

Chanyeol also stood and followed.  “I’m going to try to make your dad have a conversation with me,” he said quietly with a smirk. 

Baekhyun responded with a laugh.  “Fighting!”

When they reached the kitchen, Baekhyun announced, “I don’t think we were very helpful, eomma,” as he peered over her shoulder to check on the stew’s progress. 

Chanyeol leaned on the kitchen island.  “I beg to differ.”

“Aigoo, mischievous boys…” she said, shaking her head as Baekhyun reached around her other side to grab a cube of radish kimchi.  She slapped his hand out of the way.

“Aish!  Can’t you wait for five minutes???”

“Sorry, eomma,” said Baekhyun with a pout. 

“Don’t worry,” said Chanyeol, grabbing Baekhyun and guiding him back to the kitchen island, where he wrapped his arms around the smaller man from behind so he couldn’t cause any more inconveniences, “I’ll handle him for you.”        

At dinner, everyone gathered around the wooden table next to the kitchen.  Baekhyun and Chanyeol helped carry the food out, finally finding a way to make themselves useful.  Once they had sat down and begun eating, Chanyeol succeeded at his challenge of making Mr. Byun talk to him.  In fact, he didn’t even need to try that hard.

“So, Chanyeol,” Baekhyun’s father began, “we are really so glad you could accompany our son home tonight.  I hope you’re enjoying the food.  We certainly have a worthy cook.”  He squeezed his wife’s hand, which made her blush and swat his hand away.  Chanyeol shot Baekhyun a look that said, ‘oh _that’s_ where you got it.’

“Oh, so enjoying it!” confirmed Chanyeol, “thank you very much, really.”

“Chanyeol,” said Mr. Byun, “tell me a little more about your business.”

“Oh, well, my family runs a shipping business.  My father inherited it but the whole family is involved really.  I run it with my uncle.”

“You help run it?  How old are you?”

“Twenty-five, sir.”

Mr. Byun raised his eyebrows as he took a gulp from his water glass.

“That’s rather impressive for someone so young.  Did your father retire?”

Baekhyun looked tentatively towards his father, aiming to discreetly change the subject.  “Ah, abuji –” but Chanyeol cut him off. 

“No, actually,” said Chanyeol stoically, but without raising his eyes from his food, “my parents died two years ago when their small airplane crashed.”  Everyone went silent.  The best way to end a conversation, Chanyeol knew, was to bring up his dead parents. 

Mr. Byun’s face withdrew into itself as he wracked his brain for an appropriate response.  What he came up with, at the same time as his wife, was to blurt something along the lines of “I’m terribly sorry to hear that.” 

“It’s okay,” said Chanyeol, waving them away with his chopsticks. 

“I’m sorry, Yeollie,” said Hajin after a moment.  Her parents stared at her in confusion while Chanyeol and Baekhyun swiveled their heads from Hajin to one another, then dissolved into sudden laughter. 

“Where’d you get that???” asked Baekhyun, blushing because he knew the answer.

Hajin stated matter-of-factly: “I heard you call him that at your graduation - and earlier today.”

“Hajin,” said Mr. Byun, looking sideways at his daughter and addressing her in a flat, scolding tone,

“No!” interrupted Chanyeol, “she can call me that if she wants!” and then he began laughing in a sort of bellowing way which embarrassed Baekhyun until he was laughing also; then Hajin and finally her parents were overcome.  The entire table was consumed by a twinkling kind of skittish laughter, and in the short silence which followed, Baekhyun felt something settle in his chest.  He thought he recognized it as the feeling he occasionally got when he was at complete peace with his surroundings.  Perhaps Chanyeol saw this, because he slipped a quick glance towards his boyfriend and squeezed his thigh in reassurance.  Before Chanyeol could move his hand away, Baekhyun reached for it with his left hand and held it next to him.  

“Well,” said Mr. Byun, “I haven’t seen your apartment, but I imagine you live in a comfortable manner to say the least.  I hope you don’t spoil Baekhyun too much.” 

Chanyeol giggled uncomfortably, as if some emotion was stuck in his throat, then looked between Baekhyun and his father.  He firmed his grip on Baekhyun’s hand. 

“Well, sir, only the best for your son.”

Baekhyun could hardly look up from his food, embarrassed and welling with love.   _What did I do to deserve this?_ he wondered with a smile.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we go with a tiny bit of Baekhyun backstory! This chapter was partially inspired by how Baekhyun has zero sense of direction so Chanyeol always has to follow him around in real life haha.

If there was one thing Baekhyun certainly lacked (aside from height) it was a reliable sense of direction.  Unlike with his height however, he never resented this shortcoming; in fact, over the last few years he had developed the steadying habit of wandering. 

It started after a fight he had with H in his dorm-room junior year.  Baekhyun had been in tears, his fingernails digging into his arms and threatening to draw blood as he ripped down the stairs and out the building onto the twilight-covered sidewalk.  It was September and the trees still had leaves to rustle in the breeze, although the air had a sharp edge to it which signaled the shift would soon occur from pleasant summer to stagnant winter.

Baekhyun could barely control his legs, so he let them carry him randomly across the campus he could still hardly navigate despite it being his third year of residence.  When his lungs finally felt like they were dissolving, he let himself collapse onto a bench on the other side of campus and he slept there, too scared to go back to the room with H in it. 

After that, every time something went bad, Baekhyun took to wandering.  The running turned to meandering and the campus expanded into the city and neighborhoods around it.  He found it was a good way to clear his head and that his knack for getting lost allowed him to feel some kind of metaphorical distance between his body and the problems in his head. 

Baekhyun found at first, H only got angrier with him when he left to go for his walks, but H eventually got used to them and they gave him time to cool off his anger toward Baekhyun.  After moving in with Chanyeol, Baekhyun knew he would never need to get away from danger the way he used to, but he still couldn’t kick the wandering habit; especially when Chanyeol was away at work for most of the day and Baekhyun got bored with calling number after number trying to find a studio to rent for his music lessons.  If he was too lazy to walk, he usually just played video games, but he’d found them less enjoyable alone after getting used to playing them with Chanyeol, so he often ended up forcing himself outside anyway.      

Even after weeks of going for his walks, Baekhyun still got easily lost navigating his new neighborhood, but he trusted himself and the ever-present glass figure of Chanyeol’s – their – building in the skyline.  When Chanyeol found out via text what his boyfriend spent his time doing when he was gone, he was horrified; he knew from experience that Baekhyun could be known to get lost getting from their apartment on the top floor to the gym seven floors below.  Chanyeol never walked with Baekhyun without their hands together, his arm around the smaller man, or his hands on his boyfriend’s shoulders to guide him. 

“It’s comforting to me,” explained Baekhyun into his cell phone one day while meandering down a street lined with vendors and low buildings with stores selling trinkets. 

“Well it’s stressing me out,” complained Chanyeol into Baekhyun’s ear.  Baekhyun shoved his hand into his jeans pocket.  For a moment, he was very worried:  He couldn’t read Chanyeol’s face over the phone, and he convinced himself Chanyeol was upset with him.   _ How could he be mad?  He never gets annoyed with me.  This is all my fault for needing these stupid coping-mechanisms.  Maybe I’d be more lovable if I functioned like everybody else _ .  Baekhyun was pulled out of his negative spiral when he heard Chanyeol’s laugh in his ear.  He realized he’d gone into tunnel vision and the street looked suddenly wider as he came out the other end. 

“Did you hear me, silly?” asked Chanyeol.  Baekhyun could visualize the smile.  “I said you’ll have to take me with you on one of your walks.”

“Oh,” replied Baekhyun, smiling to himself as he walked into a cloud of smoke from a food stall, “I would like that.  It’s kind of lonely around without you.” 

“And it’s boring without you.  I miss you baby,” said Chanyeol, “but sadly I have to go back to work now.  Be good while I’m gone, okay?”

Baekhyun giggled.  “Okay,” he said, then slid his phone back in his pocket.  He couldn’t believe he almost let his mind get to that place it used to be when he was with H.  Wasn’t that what these walks were for?  Clearing himself out?  After several more minutes of walking through the hectic market area, Baekhyun felt his phone buzz again.  It was a text from Minseok. 

M: You free right now?

B: Yeah

M: Where are you?

This presented a problem.  Minseok had a plan of the city tattooed into his memory for use whenever he needed it, but Baekhyun could barely find his house on a map.  He looked up to his left and could still clearly see his new building, but that didn’t help much; you could see that building from a lot of places.  Finally he responded.   

B: I don’t really know…

Someone bumped into Baekhyun and he realized he was being a Horrible Millennial walking while texting, so he pulled himself over so he could focus on whatever confusing directions he was about to receive. 

M: I’m in your neighborhood.  Are you there?

B: I think so

M: which street?

B: Yeoksam

The phone rang and Baekhyun almost jumped. 

“Hello?”

“Baekhyun-ah!” said Minseok, “okay so I’m also on Yeoksam – like the end where there’s a Lotte Mart.  It’s the big white building on the corner.  Do you see it?”

Baekhyun turned in circles on his heel, squinting to see if he could find anything useful.  He spotted a big white boxy building on the corner quite far ahead on his left. 

“I’m pretty sure…” he guessed.

“Great!” said Minseok, “I’ll just stay here.  Come meet me!  I have something to show you!”

Baekhyun walked the rest of the long stretch to the corner.  It was early summer and the sun shone over his vision like a spilling egg yolk.  He was relieved when he finally could see the red letters spelling Lotte Mart on the side of the building there and a moment later, Minseok’s short frame waving to him with a mostly empty iced coffee.  Baekhyun’s feet against the pavement had that weird, unsatisfied feeling running through them of not being able to move him any faster.  They felt like cardboard, he thought.  It was good to see his friend and he felt very curious to know what this surprise would be. 

“You found me!” said Minseok, smiling with his round cheeks. 

“Yup.”

“Well, I think you’ll be excited,” Baekhyun raised his eyebrows at his friend’s suggestion, “I’m here because a friend of mine has a music studio around the corner she’s moving out of because she found another one she thought looked more legit.  I know you’re looking for something to rent, right?”  Baekhyun nodded.  “So I told her I knew someone who’d be interested.  It’s pretty cheap, too.  I wanted to have you check it out.”

“Okay!  Thank you!”

Baekhyun _was_ excited.  Finally something had turned up and he could stop feeling awkward about bringing his three students to lessons in the apartment and hopefully recruit more.  Baekhyun followed his friend around the corner and tried to imprint the names of the streets into his memory as they passed them.  Unfortunately, he didn’t know where he had started, but at least Minseok gave him the address later.  The studio was a small space in the side of a warehouse just big enough for some instruments and maybe a couch and coffee table.  There was one window and it had manila envelope-colored walls which were sound-proofed.  Baekhyun thought it looked perfect. 

Minseok told Baekhyun he would get him in contact with the landlord. 

“Like I said,” he began, “it’s not too expensive.  However, I know money isn’t really an issue for you anymore.” 

Baekhyun just smiled in a self-satisfied way which made Minseok roll his eyes. 

“Anyway,” continued Minseok, “I’ll walk with you to your apartment because I have a feeling it’ll take you all afternoon otherwise.” 

They got home quickly (for which Baekhyun was grateful) and said goodbye.  Once inside, Baekhyun plopped on the couch and closed his eyes until he felt a peck of a kiss on his forehead startle him out of what he hadn’t realized was sleep. 

“Hi,” greeted Chanyeol, “how was your day?”

“Good.  I found a studio, I think,” and Baekhyun explained the whole situation. 

“Wow!  That’s fantastic!” said Chanyeol, “we need to get on that.”

Baekhyun liked the round-eyed, eyebrows raised expression on Chanyeol’s face; he was very good at being the earnestly enthusiastic and supportive boyfriend. 

Chanyeol had the next day off and Baekhyun took him to check out the studio and talk to the landlord.  On the whole walk over, Chanyeol alternated between holding Baekhyun’s hand and putting his arm around his shoulders, but didn’t attempt to reign in his boyfriend’s meandering except for when he took one too many turns in the opposite direction of their destination. 

“Am I ruining your reflective mood?” teased Chanyeol. 

Baekhyun tried to look at him with some sass from under his eyelids, which was hard because he was too short, but he did manage. 

“I suppose this is fine.”

Chanyeol shook his head with faux incredulousness.  “Aish I can’t believe all I put up with from you.”   

They ended up being only fifteen minutes late to their meeting with an annoyed landlord who warmed up once they opened their mouths, and on the walk home, Baekhyun let Chanyeol buy him a little stuffed puppy from one of the trinket shops on the side of the street to celebrate the new studio deal.  As they walked away with it in hand, Baekhyun pet its plush head as Chanyeol observed with a smile. 

“You know,” said Chanyeol, “maybe we should just get a real one.” 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have a little mild angst...

Baekhyun met H in voice class at the end of sophomore year.  He had fallen for H’s big, dark eyes and long, black hair – not to mention his voice (although H admitted that Baekhyun’s voice was the only one in the class which could beat his).  They became quick friends and Baekhyun couldn’t help but notice H’s handsomeness along with the praise and the little glances he bestowed on Baekhyun. 

They even had competitions (egged on by mutual friends who had seen them flirting in the gay alliance club) to see whose high note was higher or who could hold a note longer at full belt.  These little trials would invariably be peppered with expressions and challenges like “prove it,” “I dare you,” and “make me,” which only ratcheted up the perception of sexual tension. 

In fact, the whole relationship started because, all a little drunk at a party, Sehun dared Baekhyun to kiss H on the lips if he lost, which he did.  He was sitting cross-legged facing H, surrounded by friends and beer cans, and H had a smirk on his lips which seemed to know Baekhyun had kind of hoped this would somehow happen for a while – not necessarily this way though.  Still, Baekhyun blushed as he leaned forward and pressed his mouth to H’s.  He did it very softly at first and pulled away to find H staring daggers, as if daring more, so he took the bait.  He leaned in again and kissed H with his lips open this time, eliciting whoops and applause from some of the spectators.  After several seconds, the two were definitely making out.  Baekhyun had felt a melting numbness spreading over him all night, but it reached his brain then, and made him sure of nothing but being confused.  He did suppose he felt somewhat relieved, and on top of that, he could feel H’s hands all over him. 

“Aaaish!  Get a room – seriously!” whined Zitao, averting his eyes and taking a swig of beer. 

“Wow,” said Kris to no one in particular, “are we sure they aren’t already banging each other and we just didn’t know?” and Yixing gave him an uncomfortable and tight nod in response while Sehun just watched, sideways and smug for having orchestrated the entire event. 

“Eeeeeeeeeeh!” said Jongdae in approval.

In the end, they wound up taking Zitao’s advice:  They excused themselves and slipped off to H’s single, but not before Junmyeon could get a final word in. 

“Please be safe!” he said, his eyebrows turned upwards in concern. 

Baekhyun didn’t remember that night very well, but he did know it left him feeling a good kind of fuzzy in the morning; the kind that might mean you’re in love.  His only doubt came when he woke up alone and, when he thought about it, couldn’t remember whether he’d ever given approval for any of it, but he chalked that up to the drinking.   


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things heat up a little. I read this thing about Baekhyun having very little alcohol tolerance (poor lil' bub) and it said he turns red after one drink. I'd totally believe that so I got inspired.

Baekhyun didn’t go to bars often, so when he did it was usually to act as moral support or wingman or whatever for one of his single friends.  Baekhyun had a reputation for being a pushover (which he despised) but he couldn’t bring himself to shake the label when Jongdae begged him to go out with him even though it was Friday, so it was going to be a zoo, and Baekhyun hated going out in crowds.  Jongdae met Baekhyun in front of his dorm and they walked together (sure enough through throngs of people) to the bar where Baekhyun had seen Chanyeol that one time.  It was two weeks ago that Baekhyun had gone on the date with Chanyeol, but he still hadn’t steeled the guts to call the man back.  He kept pep-talking himself:  _ I’m strong!  I have nothing to be afraid of this time.  I’m healed, I know the warning signs, and I’m in control.  Fighting! _  But by the time his hands touched the phone, he always froze.   _ Tomorrow _ . 

But that night at the bar, Baekhyun finally found his excuse to make a move.  While ordering a drink (let’s be real, it was Sprite) by himself, he spotted Chanyeol across the room, his hair down again and wearing a black and white Hawaiian shirt (although it looked like an Extra Special Fancy One) and leaning against the wall with boredom drenching his face.  He looked so different from the flirting, dancing, drinking playboy Baekhyun had seen there months ago. 

Baekhyun noticed Jongdae had found a patron to talk to, so, confident that Jongdae could remain occupied for plenty of time, Baekhyun snuck over and said quickly, “I see someone I need to say hi to.  See you in a while okay?” and then made his way to Chanyeol.  The older man had a cup in his hand and his eyes perked wide when he saw Baekhyun pushing through the grinding crowd at the center of the bar.  He knew he had seemed to be ghosting Chanyeol, but Baekhyun tried to act casually anyway. 

“Why the long face?” he asked with a sweet smile.  Chanyeol smiled back, but Baekhyun thought he detected a hint of bitterness in the expression. 

“Lonely,” said Chanyeol pointedly, and then he took a sip of whatever was in his cup, “I actually came here because I was sure it was where you saw me; it’s closest to the university.  I thought I might catch you.”  Now Chanyeol’s smile turned rueful.  Baekhyun looked at the floor, embarrassment taking hold as he tried not to get upset with his own mind. 

“Listen, I’m really sorry I didn’t call you…I – was scared, I think.  I paralyzed myself.  I almost called you – I wanted to!  I promise –” 

“Hey, hey, slow down.  It’s okay, Baekhyun, give yourself a break,” said Chanyeol, “I don’t want you to be afraid of me.”

Baekhyun pouted.  “I’m not afraid of you.  Why didn’t _you_ ever call _me_?” 

“Because I was worried about this.”  Chanyeol sighed.  “You seemed apprehensive; like something was holding you back the whole time – especially when I offered you a ride.  I didn’t want to pressure you.”

Baekhyun couldn’t believe he had just spent two weeks ghosting a guy yet that guy turned out not just to not be mad, but also to be concerned about the ghost’s wellbeing.  Baekhyun couldn’t help but gape a little. 

“I can explain that!” blurted Baekhyun, “after my last relationship ended I went to the school counselor and she said it’s dangerous to get in a car alone with someone you don’t know very well.  It’s just a rule I have now – it had nothing to do with you!  I really like you!”   _God_ , thought Baekhyun, _I must sound like a desperate idiot_ , but Chanyeol just smiled and sipped his drink.

“That makes sense,” said Chanyeol, “I should have thought of that.  I really like you too.  That’s why I missed you.” Chanyeol’s eyes fluttered from his cup to meet Baekhyun’s and Baekhyun could feel that between the beautiful eyes looking at him softly, and the complement in that deep, timber-like voice, he was starting to blush madly. 

“Well shit,” said Baekhyun in a flustered voice as he felt himself pushed farther towards Chanyeol by the crowd.  At this proximity, he could see that the taller man’s shirt was, in fact, some kind of expensive-looking silk, and he could tell he liked the way Chanyeol smelled; like what, he couldn’t be sure, but it was comforting.  “I’m so sorry.  I could…I could make it up to you, you know…all the waiting…”

“Don’t be sorry,” said Chanyeol, “however,” he added, raising an eyebrow, “what did you have in mind?” 

And that is how the two of them ended up making out in a bathroom stall.  Baekhyun’s dorm had Yixing in it, and Chanyeol’s apartment was too far away, so this was the next best option. 

“You have no idea…” said Chanyeol breathily in the breaks where their lips parted, “…how hard it was not to…to run up and kiss you the moment I…saw you…”

Baekhyun pulled away for a moment in shock.  “Are you serious?” he asked.

“Completely,” said Chanyeol, “why wouldn’t I be?”  Chanyeol held Baekhyun’s face in his wide hands.  “You’re so pretty.”

The tips of Baekhyun’s mouth edged into a smile and his eyes rolled minutely upwards as he let out a puff of air through his nose. 

“I guess I just have self-esteem issues sometimes,” he said, “anyway, why are we stopping?”

That is also how Baekhyun ended up giving Chanyeol a blowjob for the first time.  He had been thinking about the possibility and wanting to do it ever since it occurred to him as they walked into the bathroom, and he had really worked himself into doing it.  Baekhyun offered once it had gotten to the point when Chanyeol’s lips were all over Baekhyun’s neck and Chanyeol’s finger were unbuttoning the top of Baekhyun’s shirt.

“Are you sure?” asked Chanyeol.

Baekhyun nodded aggressively, and that was that.  He could tell he was doing well by the way Chanyeol kept making soft grunting sounds as he ran his hands through Baekhyun’s hair, and by the way Chanyeol rolled his eyes back in his head as his eyelids fluttered shut.  Afterwards, Chanyeol asked Baekhyun if he needed anything and he said no, which was true in that instant.  All he wanted was for his ghosts to go bother someone else so Chanyeol wouldn’t notice them and become one himself.

They cleaned themselves up in the bathroom, and Chanyeol couldn’t keep his eyes off the smaller man and the way he inspected himself in the mirror.  Baekhyun fluffed his bangs with his spindly fingers and refolded his collar.  Chanyeol didn’t know if Baekhyun was so focused because he was embarrassed to make eye-contact, but Chanyeol enjoyed the opportunity to observe Baekhyun and how, for example, you could detect satisfaction in his lips at the way he didn’t look too noticeably disheveled.  Chanyeol thought it was cute.  The two men went outside back into the bar to get something else to drink.  They settled for two stools at the counter. 

“Can I buy you something?” asked Chanyeol after ordering himself a whisky.  Baekhyun looked a little embarrassed as he answered.   

“Ah, something not too strong please – and I like sweet?”  Chanyeol smiled and ordered a gin and coke, then turned to Baekhyun with an eyebrow raised. 

“When I drink,” explained Baekhyun, “my whole body turns red and I get really loud.  I don’t want that to happen.”

Chanyeol nearly spit out his whisky laughing at this as the bartender slid Baekhyun’s drink over the counter. 

“That’s adorable,” said Chanyeol, “but yeah it also might be bad.  Just be careful with that.  I think you’ll like it.” 

Baekhyun sipped his cocktail and expressed his approval, and the two sat like that for a while with the club music throbbing in the background.  The entire time, Baekhyun couldn’t help but steal glances to his left to watch Chanyeol – how his back curved over the bar to his shoulders; how his hair shielded his eyes; how his chest was visible through the buttons in his shirt; how his hand dwarfed the glass in it.  They both finished their drinks and ordered seconds.   

Eventually, Chanyeol turned to Baekhyun and a smile twitched his lips when he caught the younger man staring. 

“So,” began Chanyeol, “I know this might sound odd since you just had my dick in your mouth and all, but I think we need to have a heart-to-heart; like get to know why whatever miscommunication happened happened if we’re going to keep seeing each other and make this work, you know?”

Baekhyun was a little taken-aback.  In all honestly, he agreed, but he could already feel the alcohol hitting him hard and wasn’t sure if he was up for this talk.  Not to mention, he worried he might scare Chanyeol away if he told the truth.  He decided to give it a go though, and he decided he would need to be completely honest. 

“Ah.  Okay,” he managed to squeak. 

“I’m so sorry if I’m freaking you out,” said Chanyeol, “but I – I just really need to know why you couldn’t reach out to me.  Is there something I should have done?”

“No!” assured Baekhyun, “agh, I just need to tell you!  I didn’t think I would be seeing anyone this quickly.”  Chanyeol just listened, silent, waiting for Baekhyun to explain. 

“I just got out of a relationship about two months ago.  It was an, um, abusive relationship.”  Baekhyun laughed mirthlessly.  “I’m still getting used to calling it that.  I guess it made me feel like – well it made me doubt that anyone could be interested in me.  So I guess you’re just causing me some cognitive dissonance.” 

All of a sudden, Chanyeol noticed that Baekhyun’s glass was empty and there were tears balancing on the edges of his eyes.  Chanyeol could even see that Baekhyun’s face was a little flushed despite it being shrouded in blue light.

“Shit, okay I think you’re done,” said Chanyeol, taking the glass out of Baekhyun’s hand and replacing it with a hand of his own.  Baekhyun’s palm felt sweaty.  Baekhyun giggled, but in this strange way where it sounded smoky and sad. 

“Wow, getting drunk really helps me express myself.  I should do this more often.” 

Chanyeol squeezed Baekhyun’s hand and got him some water.  “Maybe not.” 

“So,” he restarted, as Baekhyun chugged his water, “do you need me to back-off?  I didn’t know.  Is this too much for you now?”

Baekhyun tugged Chanyeol’s hand towards him, “No!” he practically yelled, “I really, really like you, and I think you being here was exactly what I needed!  I should just let myself do what feels right, and this feels right.  I don’t want to feel scared anymore.  You make me feel like whatever the opposite of scared is.”

“Safe?” offered Chanyeol.

“Yeah, that.  Safe,” Baekhyun slurred.   

“I’m glad,” said Chanyeol as he held Baekhyun’s dainty hand to his cheek, “because I promise to protect you.  Including from yourself, like, right now.  My God I’m never letting you near alcohol you really weren’t kidding.”  Just then, Chanyeol’s attention was grabbed by someone behind Baekhyun coming towards them.  “Don’t look now but your friend is coming over, Baek.  Don’t worry, I’ll help get you back to your dorm.” 

“Eh, Baekhyun-ah!” exclaimed Jongdae, and the sound almost cut the air in the club in two.  He gestured to Chanyeol, “who’s this?”

“My boyfriend,” said Baekhyun, as confidently as he could muster. 

Jongdae shook his head, “boyfriend, my foot.  Here, let’s get you home.”

Chanyeol stood, “I’m Chanyeol.  Let me help.  This is my responsibility.” 

Jongdae sighed in response.  “Well, Chanyeol, you’re right about that.  You should have seen what happened last time he touched alcohol.  Anyway, fine.  Put your arm around his waist for me.” 

Baekhyun didn’t have too much trouble walking, but unless he leaned into Chanyeol, he couldn’t move in a straight line.  The trio left the bar with Jongdae directing the way to the dorms. 

“What  _ did _ happen, if I may ask?” said Chanyeol.

“I hooked up with my abuser for the first time,” said Baekhyun, matter-of-factly. 

Jongdae looked at Chanyeol with suspicious eyes.  “You guys didn’t...do anything…while he was like this…did you?”

“No!” insisted Chanyeol, “I mean, we  _ did stuff _ , but that was while he was totally sober.”

Baekhyun piped up, “it was all my idea, Dae, including the drink, so back off.”

Jongdae’s jaw dropped.  “What???” (this was followed by pleas from the other two to quiet down – it’s 1:30 in the morning for goodness sake.  He continues in an emphatic whisper.) “you wanted to drink, Baekhyun???  Why???”

“I didn’t want Chanyeol to think I was some scrub,” explained Baekhyun.

Jongdae made an exasperated noise in response and threw up his hands.  Chanyeol scolded the man in his arms. 

“Please don’t ever let yourself be an idiot to please me.  Understand?”

“Fine,” grumbled Baekhyun, “I’ve learned my lesson.” 

Chanyeol turned to Jongdae as the rounded the last corner before Baekhyun’s door. 

“I’m surprised two glasses made him like this.”

“I know,” agreed Jongdae, “he has never had any tolerance.  It takes a while to get into his system, but once it does, it really messes with him.  Besides, they make stiff drinks there.”  Jongdae motioned to the door in front of them.  “This is him.  Can I leave you two?”

“Yes,” said Chanyeol, “thanks...”

“Jongdae.”

“Great.  Thank you.” 

Once his friend was gone, Baekhyun hugged Chanyeol tight. 

“Seriously,” he said, “I mean what I said.  I really like you and I want this to work.  I’ll call you, and, sorry I got so sloppy tonight.” 

Chanyeol just laughed and ruffled Baekhyun’s hair.  “That’s okay.  I’ll be looking forward to hearing from you.  Now, let’s get you inside.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I'll probably not update as quickly going forward because the next parts haven't been beta'd yet haha. Anyhoo I hope you enjoyed it and don't worry, there's a lot more coming :)
> 
> Also, if you feel so inclined (and wanna see some lq mostly exo content) feel free to check out my tumblr [here](http://baekhyuns-diamond.tumblr.com/) :P


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is like a total behemoth it's super long so sorry. Anyway, the reward is some smut haha.

Baekhyun was apparently very serious about his drunken promise to contact Chanyeol, because at around noon the next day, Chanyeol was falling asleep over some aggressively dry memo one of his employees had handed him (he was trying to be responsible but not honestly trying that hard) when his phone started buzzing against his wooden desk, jolting him awake.  At first, he was annoyed by the interruption, that is, until he read the caller-ID. 

“Baekhyun-ah!” he greeted, answering the call.

“I promised I’d call,” came the bubbly, yet somewhat rough-sounding voice on the other end. 

“I’m glad you did,” said Chanyeol, grinning in spite of himself, “how are you holding up today?”

“I’m a little hung-over, but not bad at all.  I could’ve used more sleep though,” said Baekhyun.

“You looked like you were going to pass out.  How could you not sleep?” asked Chanyeol, rubbing his eyes from his own sleep-deprivation. 

“Well,” began Baekhyun, “after you left, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” 

Chanyeol breathed a flustered laugh.  He wasn’t one to blush often, but he thought he could feel the tips of his wide ears growing warm.   _This is dumb_ , he thought, _I’m not a high school gi_ rl.  But still, he decided to just let himself enjoy the soft feeling inside him which appeared whenever Baekhyun was involved in his life.  Chanyeol was the one who had pursued this after all. 

“I’ve been thinking a lot about you too.  When can I see you again?” he asked. 

“That’s exactly why I’m calling!” chirped Baekhyun, “I’m playing a gig at a restaurant in west Songpa next Thursday.  I was thinking we could grab a bite after that at the restaurant?”

“That would be great, Baek!  I’d love to see you play again.  Also, that’s not far from where I live.”

“Isn’t that area pretty expensive?” asked Baekhyun, sounding a little surprised.

Chanyeol had forgotten; Baekhyun had no idea about Chanyeol’s work, or family, or living conditions.  Chanyeol knew he would find out in no time, but he didn’t feel like having that conversation that very second, so he settled on being vague. 

“…a little…” he ventured.  He heard Baekhyun’s light laugh in his ear.

“Sorry,” said Baekhyun, “that was kind of an inappropriate question.  Anyway, on that topic, I think the restaurant is also kind of fancy, so…hope that’s okay.” 

“That’s fine,” said Chanyeol with a smile, “that means I get to spoil you.  It will make up for the lousy atmosphere from last night’s date – if you could call it a date…”

Baekhyun laughed awkwardly, like a robot.  “Yeah, sorry about that.” 

“Don’t be,” assured Chanyeol, “I enjoyed it.  Except the part where you started crying.  I didn’t enjoy that.” 

“I enjoyed it too,” agreed Baekhyun “I think I needed it – including the crying to be honest.”

There was silence between the two of them for a moment.  It made Chanyeol nervous for some reason.  He couldn’t figure out why it was so difficult to control his brain around Baekhyun. 

“Baek?” he said.

“Sorry, just thinking for a sec...” came Baekhyun’s voice, “so I guess I’ll see you on Thursday night then?  I’ll text you the name of the restaurant.  I think I start at 6:30.” 

“Okay, thanks,” said Chanyeol, “aish, Thursday feels like so long from now.  Baekhyun,” started Chanyeol,

“Mm?”

“I’m really glad I found you last night.”

“Me too,” confirmed Baekhyun, “see you soon.”

“See you soon.” 

For the first time really, Baekhyun surveyed his wardrobe and felt like he didn’t know what to do with any of his clothes.  He usually didn’t think too much about it, opting for casual-wear (and coveting anything with ‘supreme’ smacked on it – let’s be real, the boy was a little basic) but for this gig, he would definitely need a suit.  The only issue being that Baekhyun hadn’t bought a new suit since his freshman year and he suddenly wanted to look nice for his date.  After pouting at his closet for around ten minutes, Baekhyun just decided to wear a black button-up and black slacks.  That would have to do.

Next, he stared at the mirror for a while, doing vocal exercises and futzing with his hair.  He smiled for a moment when he decided his looks were satisfactory, letting the warm anticipation swirl through his brain at the thought of seeing Chanyeol again.  Before he knew it, it was 5:50 and he was supposed to be to the restaurant by 6:15 in rush-hour.  He swallowed a capsule of anxiety medication, texted Chanyeol the name and address of the restaurant, and caught a cab.  In the backseat, watching the rain-drenched lights of Seoul and their reflections in the river blend together against the window, Baekhyun focused on his breathing and practiced phantom piano, using his knees as keys.  

“Baekhyun-ah!” greeted Chanyeol as Baekhyun entered the restaurant.  It was an upscale Japanese bistro with a bamboo bar.  That’s where Chanyeol was sitting, affixed to a stool and swallowing the dregs of dark liquid in a stout glass.  He had his hair back again and was still wearing a long felt jacket. 

Baekhyun was slightly caught off-guard.  He hadn’t expected his date to be there so soon. 

“Chanyeol-ssi!” he said in surprise, “you’re early!” 

Chanyeol grinned and motioned for Baekhyun to come closer.  “I wanted to make sure I got a good seat.  How have you been?”

“Not too bad,” said Baekhyun, letting Chanyeol draw him into a quick hug, “lots of studying.  Lots of practicing for my gigs, ya know.  How about you?” 

Chanyeol made eye-contact as he took Baekhyun’s hand and kissed it, smiling slyly.  “I’ve been distracted – too busy thinking about you.” 

Baekhyun had to restrain himself from grinning like an idiot.  He gave Chanyeol a peck on the cheek.  “You’re so greasy.” 

Chanyeol chuckled and stood, wrapping an arm around Baekhyun and walking into the main area of the restaurant.  In the center of the room was a slightly raised platform with a Yamaha baby grand on it. 

“I guess you need to be up there pretty soon,” observed Chanyeol, then, turning to the maître d, “for two please, I’m treating the entertainment when he’s done,” and with that he squeezed his arm around Baekhyun’s shoulders. 

“Of course, Mr. Park,” said the maître d, leading them to a table.  It struck Baekhyun as slightly unusual that the restaurant knew Chanyeol’s name without him having a reservation, but he figured there could be numerous explanations for that, so he brushed it off.  The maître d turned to him at their booth. 

“By the way,” he said, “the manager is looking for you.” 

“Oh!” exclaimed Baekhyun a little too loudly.  

Chanyeol laughed and squeezed Baekhyun’s hand.  “You’ll be great.”            

Baekhyun didn’t have to play anything particularly difficult – just a bunch of standard love songs, and he sang in the quiet voice he had trained himself to make blend in with the tinkle of piano keys, glasses, and utensils on plates.  No one noticed him much, except between songs, when most of the restaurant would pause for the obligatory rustle of applause.  No one noticed him much that is, with the exception of Chanyeol, who was staring at him with a rapt expression every time Baekhyun looked over. 

Afterwards, Baekhyun took a little bow and shuffled to the side of the restaurant to sit with Chanyeol.  Chanyeol couldn’t stop smiling. 

“What?” asked Baekhyun, unable to not smile right back. 

“That was really pretty,” said Chanyeol. 

Baekhyun blushed lightly.  “Thanks.” 

“Do you want some tea?” asked Chanyeol, taking a sip from his cup, “I got myself sake but didn’t get you any for obvious reasons.” 

Baekhyun rolled his eyes at the older man’s protectiveness, but decided to just go with it.

“Ah, yes, tea would be nice,” said Baekhyun, “thank you.” 

They looked at the menu and ordered.  Baekhyun got an unagi bowl and Chanyeol got a sashimi bowl.  Baekhyun felt awkward, as if he were too silent, or stiff, or maybe both.  Whatever it was, Chanyeol didn’t seem to be feeling it.  Either that or he was very good at looking smooth.  Baekhyun decided to just blurt the question that had been bothering him ever so slightly all week. 

“Chanyeol-ah, what do you do?  Like, you know all about me and my studies but I don’t really know you besides your personality, which is great, of course, but…” he trailed off.  He wasn’t sure where that thought was going so he decided to just let Chanyeol take it from there.  Hopefully he wasn’t being weird.  Chanyeol flashed a pinched, amused smile as the waiter came by with Baekhyun’s tea. 

“Yeah, I figured this would come up,” replied Chanyeol as he checked the tea for steeping and then poured it into Baekhyun’s green ceramic cup.  Baekhyun almost boiled over with embarrassment at the gesture, but he kept his mouth shut, feeling more and more curiosity towards the man about whom he had daydreamed. 

“I run a shipping company with my uncle.  It’s not very exciting.  It’s not music.” 

Baekhyun soothed his tired fingers on the outside of his warm cup.  “Shipping – wait like Park Shipping?  You run Park Shipping?”  He finally put two and two together.  He gave a blowjob to the C.E.O. of a multinational corporation.  He felt nauseous. 

Chanyeol just nodded slowly.  Baekhyun was still in shock.  “But you’re so young!”

Chanyeol laughed.  “That’s why I need my uncle’s help.  I couldn’t do it by myself.  I don’t think I’d want to.” 

The strange dizziness in Baekhyun’s head was steadying, and he certainly felt less awkward; maybe even a little bold. 

“So is that why you keep paying for things for me?” he asked. 

Chanyeol’s laughter turned into a sputter.  “Well, yeah.  I wouldn’t want you to pay for things when I can afford to take care of them.  Besides, I like having someone to spoil.” 

Baekhyun fluttered his eyes in embarrassment.  “Channie~” he said almost chidingly.

“Mm?”

“Why are you so interested in me?”   

“Because,” he said with a smile, “you’re sweet, and kind, and genuine.  I like talking to you.  You’re very talented, and not to be shallow, but when I look at you you’re so pretty I feel fluttery inside.” 

Baekhyun gulped.  He could hardly look Chanyeol in the eye.  “That’s one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.”

“I mean it,” confirmed Chanyeol.  At that moment, the waiter arrived with their food and Baekhyun cursed the timing for ruining the moment.  He felt awkward again, but at least he could use eating as a distraction.  Once they were back to being alone, Chanyeol continued. 

“Besides, I’m honestly lonely a lot lately.  Sometimes I even feel lonely around other people, but not with you.  You’re like the perfect cure for loneliness.” 

Something in Baekhyun’s brain clicked.  “I know what you mean, actually,” he said, “in my last relationship, I often felt like I couldn’t trust anyone to talk to or get help.  It was really isolating.  I think I found a lot of comfort in my family though.”

“I wish I could do that.”

Baekhyun was confused.  He hadn’t seen Chanyeol look so flat before.  “Is your family not close?” he asked.

“Well,” said Chanyeol, “a lot of them are overseas.  My uncle is my business partner so we have honestly kind of a strange relationship.”

“What about your parents?” Baekhyun knew this was a bad question immediately after he said it.  He managed to make Chanyeol look even less upbeat. 

“They died in a plane crash two years ago.  While I was away at college.”  Chanyeol gave a dark smile.  “So, no.”

Baekhyun looked at his food, a little embarrassed, a lot sad, and pushed his rice around sulkily with his chopsticks. 

“…oh,” he said in a quiet voice, “Chanyeol, I’m really sorry.” 

Chanyeol managed to force a smile through the sad fog which was settling over the date. 

“Hey,” he said, tapping Baekhyun’s arm in reassurance, “nothing you can do about it, right?”

Baekhyun gave a pinched smile and allowed himself to start eating.

“You know,” began Chanyeol, “I think they would’ve liked you.”

“Your parents?” asked Baekhyun, blushing slightly.

“Yeah.  They didn’t like my being gay – not because they were terribly prejudiced – but because they thought it’d be bad press for the company when I inherited it.  It’s stupid, I know, but I think you would have changed their minds.” 

As Chanyeol spoke and ate, he couldn’t keep his eyes off his date.  Baekhyun did not really know what to say to any of this, so he just smiled shyly.

“Thanks,” he said, then, after a moment, decided to open up a little more about himself. 

“I honestly don’t know if my parents trust me in relationships anymore,” he said, trying to make it seem funny.  Chanyeol didn’t laugh.

“Your last boyfriend must have been a real ass, huh?” he asked instead. 

Baekhyun gulped slowly.  “Yeah.  He didn’t seem like it at first though.”

Chanyeol’s face looked faraway, as if contemplating or plotting something. 

“Hm,” he said, “I wish I could meet this guy and give him a piece of my mind.  I don’t understand how anyone could do that to you.”  Then Chanyeol’s grin turned devilish.  He raised an eyebrow. 

“Maybe I could rough him up a little for you.” 

Chanyeol was obviously joking, but it still made Baekhyun uncomfortable. 

“Chanyeol!  No!  Besides, that wouldn’t be tit-for-tat; it wouldn’t be fair.”

“What do you mean?” asked Chanyeol, turning serious.  Baekhyun sighed.  At this rate, the date was going to end up like the last one.   

“I mean, he didn’t hurt me.  Sure, sometimes he was a little rough, but he never outright hit me or anything.  Mostly he was very possessive and controlling, and if I didn’t listen to him and do what he wanted, he could get really mean.  He insulted me a lot.  He assured me that if I ever left him he would make me miserable, so it took me a long time to find the bravery to do it.  But he never ‘roughed me up,’ I guess”    

Chanyeol let out a long breath.  Baekhyun didn’t realize how much blurting all of that would make his emotions go haywire.  His lips were trembling and he couldn’t blink or else tears would start running down his face. 

“Wanna change the subject?” asked Chanyeol. 

Baekhyun sniffled and returned to eating, letting a tear crash onto his food.  This caused him to laugh and wipe at his face with the back of his hand. 

“Shit, sorry,” he said breathily.  Chanyeol took his hand and squeezed.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said, “Aish, we’re just making each other sad, huh?  Why don’t we talk about something happy?  Baek-ah what makes you happy?”

“Okay.  Um, my friends and family.  I have a sister named Hajin and a brother named Joongi.  He’s doing his military service.  Music makes me happy.”

“Mm,” interrupted Chanyeol, “do you have a place to teach lessons, by the way?”

“No,” admitted Baekhyun, “I teach at U of Seoul now, but I don’t know what I’ll do when I graduate in a few months.”

“Maybe I can help you find a studio,” offered Chanyeol with a smile. 

“Are you serious?” asked Baekhyun.

“Why not?”

Baekhyun’s lips melted into a smile.  “Thanks,” he said, “anyway, do you like your job?  I’m honestly a little shocked.  I find rich people kind of intimidating.”

Chanyeol laughed awkwardly.  “Please don’t focus on that,” he said, “anyway, other rich people annoy the shit out of me.  Including my uncle sometimes.  They don’t trust anyone and they expect special favors.  That’s why I don’t like bringing it up.  I don’t want to be treated differently.  Anyway, I’m not complaining.  I know I have it great.  I honestly can’t see myself staying with the company forever though.  We’ll see.” 

Knowing Chanyeol’s attitudes put Baekhyun more at ease. 

“I have the opposite problem,” he said, “I’m worried about becoming a starving artist.”

Chanyeol smiled and gestured towards Baekhyun’s food with his chopsticks.  “Eat up, then.” 

“Hey!” protested Baekhyun, bugging his eyes out at his date.

“Just kidding,” said Chanyeol.

They took a long time to finish their meals because they kept getting sidetracked with talking.  Baekhyun found out that Chanyeol did a couple years at Oxford, so was fluent in English, and that he was impressively clumsy.  He spilled sake on the table (freaking out when he thought he got Baekhyun even though he didn’t) and then dropped his chopsticks on the ground about five minutes later.  Chanyeol learned that Baekhyun’s laugh was about the loudest and cutest thing he’d ever seen.  It came out in distinct repetitions of “ha, ha, ha,” and scrunched Baekhyun’s button nose.  He also learned that Baekhyun was incredibly good at explaining the complicated musical theory of traditional Korean folk music (it was a meandering conversation, indeed). 

They shared red bean ice cream for dessert and then Chanyeol paid the bill.  Baekhyun didn’t feel at all bad about letting him do it this time.  On their way out, a woman complimented Baekhyun on his playing.  Outside the restaurant, slush was falling from the awning onto Baekhyun’s head, so he penguin-huddled up to Chanyeol. 

“So,” said Chanyeol, “since you know me a lot better now,” with this he winked, making Baekhyun’s brain fly back to a week ago; _goddammit_ ; “can I give you a ride this time?”

“Of course,” agreed Baekhyun.  He felt bold.  Having Chanyeol’s warmth next to him was intoxicating.  He wasn’t usually the most naturally direct person, so he decided to be direct in the vaguest way possible. 

“Chanyeollie,” he said as they began walking to the car arm in arm. 

Chanyeol gazed down with a smile.  “Mm?”

“I don’t think I’m ready to go home just yet.”  Baekhyun watched Chanyeol’s eyes hood themselves a little as he smirked softly. 

“I was hoping you wouldn’t be,” he said, kissing Baekhyun on top of his head, “My apartment has a nice view.”

“Sounds great,” said Baekhyun, and they climbed into Chanyeol’s boxy Mercedes.  The whole way there, Chanyeol kept sneaking glances at Baekhyun’s profile.  Baekhyun caught him twice and giggled with hands to his cheeks each time.    

Baekhyun entered the apartment – or rather penthouse – and could barely see anything in the dark.  The only thing which was clearly visible was the view of Seoul out the window at the far side of the residence.  You could hardly see the thick black of the sky – instead the entirety of the window was a wall of neon lights from the skyscrapers downtown which created a kind of unnatural forest of electricity.  Baekhyun was briefly shaken from his awe by a clonking sound from behind him, followed by Chanyeol muttering “shit,” and then the rattling of bolts on a lock.  

“What happened?” asked Baekhyun.  He could barely see Chanyeol shrugging and sucking on his right thumb. 

“I clipped my finger in the door,” replied Chanyeol.

“Do I need to kiss your booboo?” teased Baekhyun. 

Chanyeol laughed, “It’s fine.  Here, let me take your jacket.” 

Baekhyun shed his blazer and shoes and gave the jacket to Chanyeol, then began meandering farther inside as Chanyeol fumbled for the coatrack. 

“Don’t you want some light?” asked Chanyeol, but Baekhyun was far more interested in the view than anything actually in the apartment (besides perhaps the bed).

“No!” he said. 

Chanyeol just chuckled.  “Okay, just be careful.  I don’t want you getting hurt.” 

Baekhyun made his way confidently to the window, although he did almost walk straight into a glass door.  “I think at this rate you’re the one more likely to get injured.” 

Baekhyun ended up with his face nearly pressed against the glass in the bedroom, and after several thumping footsteps, Chanyeol joined him there; both of them staring at the street below as if meditating on modern restlessness or something. 

Baekhyun sighed and took a step back to plop on the bed.  “I can’t believe you live here.”

Chanyeol followed him to the bed, and sat so that their entire sides were pressed together.  Chanyeol didn’t know how to respond, so he stayed quiet and studied the way the lights from the skyline projected colorful patterns on Baekhyun’s skin.  The patterns made a mask of his face and travelled over his clothing, dripping down his arms.  But then, Chanyeol noticed a series of very light ridges on Baekhyun’s wrists.  Baekhyun turned his head to look at the man beside him, and followed Chanyeol’s eyes to the scars.  Immediately, Baekhyun felt like he was about burst into tears and pulled his arms into his chest.  He found he was so embarrassed he couldn’t force himself to look back at Chanyeol’s reaction, but he figured Chanyeol was probably too disgusted, or disappointed, or pitying for anything to ever work.  To his surprise, when Baekhyun collected enough courage to peer again slowly at the man beside him, he saw none of those emotions; only what Baekhyun would describe as compassion and a kaleidoscope of lights on Chanyeol’s face.  Chanyeol looked back to the window as he wrapped his arm around Baekhyun’s shoulders. 

“You’re not doing that anymore, right?” was all Chanyeol said about it. 

“No,” replied Baekhyun, “I’m not.” 

Baekhyun could hardly believe it; he had never imagined the scars not causing a gigantic ordeal/ insensitive pity-party.  He felt a rush hit his brain and got an intense urge to kiss Chanyeol, and before he knew it, he was acting upon it and his lips were on Chanyeol’s, softly and just for a moment.  When they pulled away, they were both smiling and studying the lights on each other’s faces. 

“I just want to feel better,” said Baekhyun, to which Chanyeol replied, “I want that too.” 

They twined their fingers together and lay back slowly on the bed, Chanyeol over Baekhyun, with both of them still smiling between soft kisses.  Chanyeol moved on to press his kisses into Baekhyun’s jawline and neck, going slowly and taking time to softly caress the skin he kissed.  Baekhyun groaned. 

“What is it?” asked Chanyeol as his fingers explored the area around Baekhyun’s ear. 

“Kiss me,” said Baekhyun. 

Chanyeol was surprised by the neediness now in the smaller man’s voice. “I am,” he stated.  

Baekhyun’s eyes were closed and Chanyeol couldn’t help himself – he planted little kisses on Baekhyun’s soft eyelids. 

“Like last time,” Baekhyun requested, then with his eyes open and in a gravelly voice added, “please.” 

A smirk spread over Chanyeol’s lips and his gaze became a little foggier.  He leaned farther over Baekhyun and pressed yet another kiss onto the other man’s forehead. 

“Anything,” began Chanyeol before adding a kiss on the nose, “for you,” then a kiss on the lips, “baby.” 

Baekhyun felt the heat coming on again below his skin.  The pet name practically melted him, but before he could fully process anything, Chanyeol was fulfilling exactly what Baekhyun had asked for.  They were kissing much more deeply, and quickly, and hungrily than before.  Baekhyun groaned as Chanyeol nibbled slightly on his lower lip.  Chanyeol pulled away for a moment and slipped the fabric of Baekhyun’s button-up between his fingers.

“Can this come off?” he asked. 

Baekhyun nodded yes eagerly and then Chanyeol unbuttoned and removed both of their shirts.  Baekhyun thought it had never taken longer to take off two shirts.  Once Chanyeol’s was off besides the sleeves, Baekhyun held out his arms trying to coax the larger man back to him.  Chanyeol smirked again. 

“Wait just a moment baby,” he said, adding “you’re so eager,” as he launched the shirt to the floor and knelt to let Baekhyun wrap his arms around him.  Baekhyun groaned softly into the new kiss as he fixed one arm around Chanyeol’s waist and the other splayed so he could trace the bumps of the older man’s scapula and spine. 

“Is this what you wanted?” asked Chanyeol.

“Yes,” answered Baekhyun, breathily.

“So,” Chanyeol continued between kisses, “are we fucking tonight?”

“We better be,” said Baekhyun.  Chanyeol laughed at his lover’s sass. 

Still, they took their time wrapped up in each other, kissing and breathing slowly.  After a while, Chanyeol stood back on his knees again to undo his belt and pants zipper.  As he was beginning to take the pants off all the way, he glanced down at Baekhyun, who was also working excitedly with his trousers.  Chanyeol thought he saw something twinkling at the corners of Baekhyun’s eyes.

“Are you crying?” asked Chanyeol, leaning over to get a better look, concern furrowing waves in his forehead. 

“What?” asked Baekhyun in breathy surprise, “I’m not.”

“Well then your pretty eyes are just especially sparkly tonight,” said Chanyeol, although he was not completely convinced. 

Baekhyun bit the inside of his mouth and sniffled to calm the tears building in his eyes as he gave Chanyeol a smile in the blue dark.  He cursed himself in silence for getting so overwhelmed so quickly. Chanyeol chucked both pairs of pants off the bed and leaned back over Baekhyun while grinding his hips down onto the man below him. 

“Ah,” grunted Baekhyun, all the fear from his mind being erased – that was until he noticed Chanyeol abruptly stop. 

“Baek,” said Chanyeol, “I can tell you’re crying.  What happened?  You were so confident a second ago.”

_ Shit _ , Baekhyun thought,  _ why couldn’t I keep my emotions in check?  Ruin the moment, why don’t you? _  Still, Baekhyun decided to just be honest – that had worked for him so far in this relationship, even if that seemed like a miracle. 

“Ah, it’s just…” he explained, “the last time I did this it wasn’t very fun.” 

Baekhyun thought he saw something in Chanyeol’s face twitch.  He felt stupid for saying anything and that only forced out more tears. 

“Sorry,” he garbled, rubbing at his eyes, “it’s stupid.”  Chanyeol’s response almost startled him. 

“No!” insisted the larger man, “it’s absolutely not stupid!”  Chanyeol almost seemed exasperated, but he smiled tenderly at the same time and held Baekhyun’s face in one of his hands. 

“Baby,” he restarted in a softer tone, “do you want to stop?  I want you to be comfortable.” 

Baekhyun shook his head against Chanyeol’s touch.  “No I want to.  I actually think it’ll help clear my mind.”

Chanyeol smiled more and ran his thumb over Baekhyun’s cheek, then gave him a peck of a kiss on the other before laying his forehead against the smaller man’s and whispering, “okay, baby.  We can take it really slow and gentle.  I want you to feel good.”

“Okay.” 

Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun on the mouth once more and then trailed his lips over his jaw up to nibble on Baekhyun’s ear, making the smaller man groan.  Chanyeol ghosted kisses down Baekhyun’s neck and over his collar bones, then down to his pecs.  They held hands and Chanyeol’s large thumbs brushed over Baekhyun’s fingers as he twirled his tongue around Baekhyun’s nipple.  Baekhyun gasped.  Shakily, Baekhyun reached his arms down to caress Chanyeol’s wide shoulders. 

“Ah, Yeollie,” breathed Baekhyun as he felt his mind go hazy and his skin become hot.  This felt like exactly what he needed. 

Chanyeol held Baekhyun’s delicate arms and kissed his wrists, then gave a peck to the end of each of Baekhyun’s spindly fingers.  Baekhyun laughed at his lover.

“Aren’t you going to do anything else?”

“Give me a minute, darling,” said Chanyeol closing his eyes and brushing his cheek against Baekhyun’s palm, “you’re so gorgeous.  You don’t like being worshipped?”

Baekhyun sputtered as Chanyeol massaged Baekhyun’s hips and leaned down to kiss the younger man’s tummy, which was just soft enough to be pillow-y on his lips. 

“I’m not gorgeous,” said Baekhyun, trying to focus on rolling his eyes even though there was heat growing in the base of his stomach. 

“You are to me,” argued Chanyeol.  He nipped the waist of Baekhyun’s underwear and shot him puppy-dog eyes.  Baekhyun nodded and swallowed hard, his gaze foggy.  Chanyeol slipped off Baekhyun’s boxers to reveal his hardening dick. 

Chanyeol kissed and sucked the insides of Baekhyun’s thighs, causing Baekhyun to squirm and forcing Chanyeol’s to pin down his lover’s legs. 

“You didn’t let me return the favor last time,” said Chanyeol slyly.  Baekhyun’s eyes went wide, but before he could fully react, Chanyeol’s mouth was on Baekhyun’s tip, his tongue swirling around and teasing the slit.  Baekhyun moaned as Chanyeol slid farther up, taking slightly more of him and sucking with a hum which shot vibrating waves of pleasure through Baekhyun’s abdomen.  Baekhyun threaded his hands through Chanyeol’s hair.

“Oh my god, Yeollie,” he sighed, his breathing getting faster. 

Chanyeol loved seeing Baekhyun lose control like this and wanted to get things moving along even farther.  He pulled his mouth off of Baekhyun, causing the smaller man to slump and choke on a breath.  Chanyeol stood and got a little bottle of lube from the bedside drawer.  He applied it thoughtfully over his fingers and Baekhyun watched in squirmy anticipation, breathing heavily and thinking he knew where this was going.

Chanyeol knelt back on the bed and kissed the base of Baekhyun’s twitchy dick, causing the smaller man let out a pleased squeak, which turned to a whimper when he felt Chanyeol’s slick finger slide of the back of his need, sending a shiver up his body.  Chanyeol smiled at how he could draw such a sweet variety of sounds from the man below him.    

Chanyeol took Baekhyun in his mouth again and slipped one finger into Baekhyun’s entrance, working it around. 

“Ah,” breathed Baekhyun, wiggling his ass down onto Chanyeol.

Chanyeol gave Baekhyun’s cock one last swirl of his tongue and then slipped his lips down and off, pressing a kiss to the tip and looking up with sly eyes. 

Baekhyun was a mess.  His cheeks were flushed and his eyes were closed, sweat breaking out slightly over his eyebrows as he whimpered in irritation while Chanyeol kept fingering him. 

“C’mon Chanyeollie,” he whined. 

Chanyeol chuckled and kissed Baekhyun on the lips while tracing patterns into the smaller man’s thigh with his free hand.   

“Don’t worry,” he growled into Baekhyun’s ear as he pressed a second finger into Baekhyun, “I’ll finish you off later.” 

Baekhyun couldn’t make himself respond, so he just groaned.  Chanyeol curled his fingers to find Baekhyun’s prostate, and he knew he was successful when Baekhyun groaned louder and bucked his hips up. 

“Feel nice, baby?” asked Chanyeol in a low voice. 

Baekhyun nodded with his eyes closed.  “Yes, Yeollie,” he affirmed between breaths. 

“Do you want one more?”

Baekhyun nodded yes again, biting his lip.  Chanyeol added a third finger, stretching Baekhyun out, then knelt down to give the younger man a kiss at the base of his neck. 

“Chanyeol-ssi,” whispered Baekhyun into Chanyeol’s ear, “I’m ready.”

Chanyeol pecked Baekhyun’s lips, leaned back, and smiled.  He pulled his fingers from Baekhyun, eliciting another needy whine, and took off his boxers. 

“Baek?  Do you want a condom?”

“I’m clean –” answered Baekhyun quickly.  

“Me too,” said Chanyeol. 

“Then I would prefer none,” decided Baekhyun in a small voice, looking up expectantly. 

“You’re sure?” checked Chanyeol one last time. 

Baekhyun nodded with a smile.  “I trust you, Yeollie.” 

Chanyeol felt a flash of love go through him and he kissed Baekhyun on the forehead. 

Baekhyun watched in excitement as Chanyeol spread the lube over his length.  He lined himself up with Baekhyun’s entrance and pushed himself in slowly, causing Baekhyun to produce fluttery whimpers and close his eyes. 

Chanyeol leaned his face down to Baekhyun’s so that their bangs were mingling, then used his hand to guide Baekhyun’s chin up a little. 

“Hey,” he said with a sweet smile, “eyes on me, okay?”

Baekhyun’s eyelids opened slowly and he nodded very softly, making a small sound of understanding in the back of his throat. 

“Good boy.” 

Chanyeol pulled out almost all the way and then slid back in, still moving very slowly.  Baekhyun felt his eyebrows quiver and almost closed his eyes as Chanyeol’s body brushed against his cock, but he forced himself to keep his gaze as fixed on the larger man’s as it was on him.  He did however let out a very long and loud moan.  In embarrassment, his fist shot to his mouth, just managing to muffle the end of the sound into an “umf.”   

Chanyeol moved the de facto gag gingerly and held both of Baekhyun’s hands in his own. 

“I like to hear you, Baekkie,” he cooed. 

“But I’m really loud.  What if your neighbors hear?” whispered Baekhyun emphatically. 

Chanyeol smiled in amusement.  “Baekhyun, this is a penthouse.  I don’t really have neighbors.  Don’t worry about it.  Focus on how you feel, yah?”

Baekhyun nodded bashfully.  “Okay,” he squeaked. 

Chanyeol lowered himself down so their foreheads were touching and kissed Baekhyun’s mouth.  “Don’t be shy, baby.” 

Baekhyun smiled as Chanyeol began to move again.

Chanyeol kept the pace slow, slipping up and back inside his lover.  Baekhyun clung to the larger man and let a stream of satisfied sounds tumble from his throat, past his lips and onto Chanyeol’s shoulder.  Baekhyun wrapped his legs around the man above him, helping the angle so that Chanyeol was hitting Baekhyun’s g-spot as he quickened the pace but remained gentle. 

“Mmm, Chanyeol,” purred Baekhyun.  The utterance of his name made Chanyeol’s dick twitch against Baekhyun’s tightness. 

“Fuck,” he grunted, “Baek, you’re so good for me – agh…”

Chanyeol had to stop himself from thrusting too roughly – he had promised to be soft – but it helped when Baekhyun began matching Chanyeol’s rhythm with his own downward thrusts.  Chanyeol peppered Baekhyun’s face with kissed, then pressed one open-mouthed onto his lips.

“Chanyeollie,” whispered Baekhyun, his voice hoarse.

“Yes, baby?”

“I -  I’m gonna come.” 

Chanyeol was pleased to get the younger man off first.  He reached between them and wrapped his grip around Baekhyun’s leaking hard-on, working up and down.  Baekhyun’s face quivered with the concentration of keeping his eyes open and maintaining contact with Chanyeol’s.  Chanyeol’s gaze was soft and warm, and had the appearance of focusing on something behind Baekhyun’s eyes and inside him.  Chanyeol’s eyes were just so wide and pretty. 

Next thing Baekhyun knew, he was coming on his own chest, waves of pleasure crashing over him from head to toe and causing him to shudder and cry out Chanyeol’s name.  He was impressed with himself for not closing his eyes, even though they felt hazy and glazed. 

“That’s it, baby, come for me,” cooed Chanyeol, stroking Baekhyun still to help him ride out his high.  Once the other man had settled down, Chanyeol pursued his own release, keeping a sweet, medium-paced tempo.  He grunted and Baekhyun felt him begin to pull out to finish.

“Wait,” Baekhyun whispered, “inside.”  And when Chanyeol looked unsure for a moment, Baekhyun flashed his cute rectangle of a smile and wound his hands over Chanyeol’s back muscles.  “Please,” he added with a lilt in his voice and a tip of his head. 

“Whatever you want, angel,” agreed Chanyeol with a relieved smile.  He pecked Baekhyun’s nose and began to move again, finishing inside Baekhyun after a few seconds and filling him up.   Chanyeol slumped against his lover.  Baekhyun felt Chanyeol throbbing and softening inside him.

“Mm.  Sticky,” Baekhyun grumbled with a laugh.  Chanyeol’s laughter followed in quick succession.  “Sorry, baby.” 

“It’s okay.”  Chanyeol pulled out slowly and Baekhyun groaned as he felt Chanyeol’s release dripping out of him.  He was too happy and spent to be embarrassed about that.   

      Baekhyun breathed a sigh and sunk once more into Chanyeol’s body with a smile as Chanyeol twisted his fingertips through Baekhyun’s hair.

“I think I love you,” murmured Baekhyun as his sleepy eyes fluttered shut.  He hadn’t meant for the thought to escape his brain at that moment – Chanyeol would probably think it was too early for sentiments like that – but Baekhyun wasn’t feeling entirely in control of himself. 

To his almost mortified surprise, Chanyeol didn’t brush off the endearment, instead, he laughed wryly and remarked, “you only think so?  You don’t know?”

And with that, it was as if Baekhyun had permission to spill all the emotions in his body.

“I love you,” he confirmed with his eyes still closed, “I know it.”

Chanyeol squeezed his arms around Baekhyun’s compact frame.  “I love you too.” 

Baekhyun practically felt his skin glowing.  It was freeing. 

“Was that helpful, Baek?” asked Chanyeol, moving Baekhyun’s bangs from his eyes.

“Yes,” Baekhyun assured, “I feel much better.” 

“I’m glad,” said Chanyeol, adding with a tap to the thigh, “okay, my love, up, up; time for a shower.” 

Baekhyun groaned in exhaustion and Chanyeol only laughed, opting to pick the smaller man up and carry him rather than attempt to get him standing.  Baekhyun didn’t complain; he wrapped himself around the taller man like a koala.

In the shower, Baekhyun’s eyes kept fluttering open and shut, and he wouldn’t stop smiling.  The warm water soothed his nerves even more after the sex.  Chanyeol kept laughing at Baekhyun and how lazy he was being, so he decided it would be more efficient if he just washed Baekhyun’s hair and chest for him.  Baekhyun had no issue with this and stood content as the taller man’s hands carded shampoo through his hair and gave his upper body a much-needed massage. 

Baekhyun put on his underwear after letting Chanyeol dry him off, but he was cold after stepping out of the heat of the shower.  Chanyeol must have seen him shivering slightly. 

“Can you stay the night?” asked Chanyeol. 

Baekhyun yawned.  “I can.  I don’t have classes tomorrow.  Just a tutoring session in the afternoon.” 

“Okay.  Do you want something cozy to sleep in?” 

Baekhyun nodded.  Chanyeol slipped on his warm flannel pajama pants and opted to remain shirtless as he handed the top of the pj set to Baekhyun.  Seeing the smaller man in his oversized shirt made Chanyeol feel fuzzy inside and vaguely proud.  It occurred to him why they call shirts like that ‘boyfriend shirts.’

“Ready for bed?” he asked, and they climbed under the covers together.  They wrapped themselves around each other and Baekhyun used Chanyeol’s chest as a pillow.  As Baekhyun was nodding off,  Chanyeol heard him let out a little contented squeak and had to contain himself from laughing too loudly and disturbing the man in his arms.  Baekhyun fell asleep that way; with Chanyeol running his hands through Baekhyun’s fluffy, drying hair and planting kisses on his forehead.  That was also how Baekhyun awoke the next morning.  When Baekhyun’s eyes fluttered open, he found Chanyeol’s there to look into. 

“Were you watching me sleep?” he asked, balancing his chin on Chanyeol’s sternum. 

“Only for a little while.  You’re so pretty and when I stare at you and you’re awake you get embarrassed and cover your face.” 

At this, Baekhyun turned scarlet and pressed his hands over his cheeks. 

“See?” said Chanyeol with a teasing grin, “just like you’re doing now.”

Chanyeol tucked part of Baekhyun’s bangs behind his ear and kissed him on the nose, then cupped the younger man’s small face in his large hands. 

“You don’t have to be shy with me.” 

Baekhyun just stared into Chanyeol’s starry, brown eyes and sighed.  He felt like after the intimacy of last night, he could get comfortable and lost in them.  Chanyeol’s words came floating in from the dark into Baekhyun’s mind: “don’t be shy, baby,” he had said.  Baekhyun thought he would blush again, so he grumbled something into Chanyeol’s chest.

“What was that?” asked Chanyeol. 

“I said I don’t want to go home now,” answered Baekhyun.  Chanyeol liked feeling the gritty vibration of Baekhyun’s voice in his hands as he held the younger man’s face.  He leaned forward and pecked Baekhyun’s lips. 

“Then don’t.”  


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm back! Sorry it's been a while but college has been crazy! 
> 
> This is some more stuff with H. Trigger warning! This is not how a happy relationship looks!

  When Baekhyun walked into their shared dorm, he found H sitting stretched out on his bed, typing away at an assignment on his computer.

  Baekhyun wound his scarf off his neck and let it drop onto his pillow, making his way to H, whose face was still fixed to the screen, but who had an arm outstretched sideways, beckoning his boyfriend to him.

  
  Baekhyun leaned down and kissed H on the cheek as H ran his fingers soothingly under Baekhyun’s chin. H finally turned to the boy beside him and gazed at him as he removed Baekhyun’s thick black nerd glasses for him and put them on the bedside table. At the time, Baekhyun interpreted the look in H’s eyes as love, but later, with the wisdom of hindsight, he would understand it was something much darker – far more insecure.

  
  “Hi,” whispered Baekhyun as he crawled onto the tiny bed, lay down, and snuggled into H’s side. After about ten minutes, Baekhyun was drifting off to sleep, but was awoken when he heard H’s computer shut with a clap and felt H shifting next to him to put it out of the way. H’s hand went to petting Baekhyun’s hair once he was done. It felt so sweet and good. _Maybe_ , thought Baekhyun, _he’s feeling kind. Maybe this is really how he usually is – not the other way._

  
  “Hey Baek.”   
 

  “Mm?”

  
  “I’m just so stressed. This composition is due in a week and it’s fifty percent of my semester grade. The problem is I have zero ideas.”

  
  “I’m sorry, babe,” comforted Baekhyun. H’s hand in Baekhyun’s hair started to move faster and more roughly, not caring if it pulled the small man’s hair in its wandering. _Or not_. Baekhyun whined in discomfort. H used his hand to pull Baekhyun’s body up from the bed, and Baekhyun scrambled to support himself.

  
  “Agh!” he complained.

  
  “Shh,” chided H, narrowing his eyes at his boyfriend in condescension. Baekhyun looked at the boy in front of him, breathing heavily and forcing himself not to cry from the strange, sick feeling brewing within him. H brushed his thumb softly over Baekhyun’s lower lip.

  
  “Hm, you see, I’m trying to write a sweet song about you, but I can’t get inspired. You could maybe do something about that though; get my juices flowing, so to speak.”

  
  Baekhyun furrowed his brow at the crude innuendo, but didn’t say anything. H’s hand released him and left him tottering backwards on his knees. Baekhyun just watched, half aroused, half repelled as H unbuttoned his pants and took out his dick. Baekhyun wondered if H was half-hard from watching him struggle. _I didn’t think this behavior would become a pattern_ , he thought to himself ruefully.

  
  H looked at Baekhyun in a way that seemed to say ‘this will go my way no matter what you do.’ He wrapped his hand around the back of Baekhyun’s neck and pressed his head down, softly and slowly. Baekhyun tensed, but didn’t struggle.

  
  “Be good, babe,” encouraged H as Baekhyun took his boyfriend in his mouth. He had done this several times before, but never had it felt coercive like this. When they first got together, when H was so sweet to him, this would have been enjoyable. Baekhyun’s every movement felt forced, both by his own brain against all the muscles resisting and telling him to stop, and by H’s controlling gaze. H’s hand remained trained on Baekhyun’s neck, and moved occasionally to guide his head and press him further down. At one point, it caused Baekhyun to gag softly, which was not helpful to Baekhyun’s overall sense of nausea.

  
  It was over pretty quickly, but it felt like too long to Baekhyun. He got up off the bed without grazing glances with his boyfriend, and walked swiftly to the bathroom.

  
  “Where are you going?” asked H, relaxing into his bed.

  
  “To brush my teeth,” said Baekhyun tersely.

  
  H let out a snarky snort of a laugh.

  “You’ll need to try a little harder if I’m going to get inspired, babe.”

  
  “That sounds like a you problem,” retorted Baekhyun through his toothbrush. He spit into the sink.

  
  “I love you, Baek.” 

  Baekhyun walked out of the bathroom and turned off the light to change into pajamas in the shadows of darkness.

  
  “Don’t you love me too?” asked H.

  
  “I thought I did,” said Baekhyun, not caring what kind of vitriol came back at him for the honesty.

  
  “Smartass. I know you love me,” came H’s reply, “you just like to be difficult. You won’t get anyone to love you better than me.”

  
  Baekhyun collapsed into his bed, feeling H’s eyes on him. He registered slightly the anxious bent in the other boy’s words, but mostly he registered the need for control. He was silent against it.

  
  “I don’t understand why you’re being such a bitch,” said H, sounding more panicked. Baekhyun still couldn’t make himself speak. He just cried silently, hoping the moonlight through the window wouldn’t betray his tears. He rolled over just in case. Not long after, he felt something small and hard hit his back. It was the plastic remote control for the air-conditioner, and it had been hurled hard enough that the impact hurt. Still, Baekhyun didn’t make a sound.   
H’s voice floated into his head as he tried to fall asleep.

  “I’ll make you talk tomorrow. You better fucking cooperate. And don’t think about running off. I know when you have classes, you little shit.”

  
  Baekhyun felt a tear jump from his cheek and hit him on the hand with a soft splash.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And now because you suffered through that last chapter, have some domestic babysitting fluff ft. doggo!

  Hajin was used to her wooden home and residential neighborhood, not the top floor of the glass tower her brother now called home. She was old enough to stay home alone, but her parents had insisted that, while taking a long-weekend getaway, she go stay with Baekhyun and Chanyeol rather than spend several nights alone in her house.

  If she was being honest, what had managed to convinced her to sacrifice her weekend to the two major dorks (other than her parents making it extremely clear that she had no other choice) was the curiosity to see how the other half lived.

  
  In the elevator heading up, she noticed buttons for floors marked “Sky High Restaurant,” and “Pool & Gym.” That was pretty extra in her opinion. Baekhyun opened the door to his new residence after his sister knocked. He was grinning and wearing a baby pink sweatshirt.

  
  “Jinnie!” he said, pulling his sister into a hug.

  
  “Ah!” called Chanyeol from somewhere in the apartment, “is that Hajin? Hiiiiii!”  
 

  “Hi guys,” grumbled Hajin into her brother’s shirt.

  
  “So guess what we’re doing today!” Baekhyun said excitedly as he ushered Hajin inside.

  
  “What?” she asked, setting down her clothes bag.

  
  Chanyeol walked through the kitchen, wearing a blue and white striped button-up, a white baseball cap, jeans, and a smile. “We’re going to the pet store to get a puppy!” he said, “you can help us choose!”

  
  Hajin laughed. “That sounds incredible, but are you guys sure that’s a good idea? You two can barely take care of yourselves.”

  
  Baekhyun regarded his sister with a scolding look. “Excuse you?”

  
  “I know we may seem incompetent,” began Chanyeol, “but may I remind you that I run a company without incident?”

  
  Hajin was not impressed. “Yeah, but boats aren’t living creatures.”

  
  Baekhyun was done arguing. “Hajin, why don’t you put your stuff in the guest room?”

  
  At the pet store, Hajin found herself planted on the yellow linoleum floor beside a white crate containing a corgi pup with a curious bark while Baekhyun and Chanyeol were busy looking around.

  
  “Baekkkiieeee!” she whined, giving the dog’s paw a poke.

  
  “Yeeeesssss Jinnieeeee,” retorted Baekhyun in a mocking tone.

  
  “Look at this puppy.”

  
  Baekhyun crouched next to Hajin and his eyes lit up.

  
  “Chanyeol-ah!” he called, “this little guy is a cutie!”

  
  “Waaaah!” exclaimed Chanyeol, bending down to the crate with much difficulty,

  “Corgi? Is it a boy?”

  
  “That’s what it says,” confirmed Hajin.  
 

  “Myong, myong!” barked the puppy.

  
  “He sounds funny,” remarked Chanyeol, “does he have a name?”

  
  “No,” said Baekhyun, “I think he’s trying to tell us.”

  
  “Myong, ryong, myong, myong!” said the dog.

  
  “Myongryong,” decided Hajin, “his name is Myongryong.” 

  “Is he the one?” asked Chanyeol, standing because his back was getting sore.

  
  Both Byun siblings looked up and nodded, assuredly and in unison.

  “Alright, Myongryong,” said Chanyeol, “looks like it’s your lucky day.” 

  Right then, something caught Baekhyun’s eye on the other side of the room. A man was carrying a tiny white fluffy dog with him.

  
  “Sehun?” said Baekhyun in disbelief.   
Sehun’s head swiveled towards Baekhyun.

  “Baek? Chanyeol-ah? What are you guys doing here?” he asked indignantly as he walked over to greet them. Hajin stood up so her brother’s friend could see her.

  
  “Oh,” said Sehun, smiling and flicking her on the forehead, “hey, Hajin.” 

  Since they both often acted like little shits, the two had always taken a liking to each other.

  
  “We’re getting a puppy!” said Baekhyun with a rectangular grin.

  
  “Maybe we can do like doggy play-dates or something with Vivi,” suggested Chanyeol. 

  Sehun clutched his toy dog close to his chest. “Mm-hm, I’ll have to check out this pet of yours first. Vivi doesn’t just bum around with anyone.”

  
  Chanyeol rolled his eyes at Baekhyun and Baekhyun shrugged as Sehun bent down to examine the newly christened Myongryong. 

  “Hm,” he said with a serious brow, “he’s pretty cute.”

  
  “So why are you here?” asked Hajin.

  “Trading it in?” quipped Baekhyun, gesturing towards Vivi.

  
  Sehun gasped, looking only slightly sarcastic. “How dare you?” then he kissed the top of Vivi’s head soothingly as if to reassure the oblivious dog.

  “Actually she has her six month check-up with the vet in back today, thank you very much.”

  
  “Ah, well, I’m sure she’s doing well,” said Chanyeol.

  Sehun thanked the tall man pointedly.

  
“Sehun-ah, are we hanging out soon?” asked Baekhyun. 

  “Yeah,” he responded, walking away to get to his appointment, “I’ll text you soon. I think the guys are getting together later this week. Hubby here is invited as usual,” Baekhyun blushed at the joke and Chanyeol smiled proudly, “but Hajin, you can’t come. Sorry sweetie.”

  Hajin just stuck her tongue out, making Sehun laugh. 

  “Okay. Talk to you later, Hunnie!” called Baekhyun as Sehun waved goodbye.

  
  They got home much later, after getting all the gear (the crate, a bed, food, bowls, leash, and a blue collar) and being lectured on dog-ownership. Hajin was exhausted. She plopped onto the couch.

  
  “What’s for dinner?” she asked.

  
  Chanyeol and Baekhyun looked at each other in amusement.

  
  “You’re high maintenance,” said Chanyeol.

  “Yeah,” agreed Baekhyun, attempting to wrangle an overly-excited Myongryong away from his piano, “I have a new puppy to deal with.”

  
  Hajin just groaned and went to put on her pajamas. Once she came back, Myongryong had tired himself out and was calmly munching and lapping out of his doggy bowls. Baekhyun let out a sigh of relief.

  
  “You guys are rich. Don’t you have a maid to cook for you or something?”

  
  “No,” said Chanyeol, annoyed, “but I’ll tell you what; let’s get some fried chicken delivered, yah?”

  
  “Yeah!” exclaimed Hajin. 

  “Okay. I’ll get on that.”

  
  Baekhyun went to change into sweats, and when he came back, Chanyeol, Hajin, and Myongryong were all sitting comfortably on the couch, flipping through Netflix. Myongryong was curled between Chanyeol’s legs.

  
  “Aigoo, dog, you’re in my spot!” whined Baekhyun.

  Chanyeol just smirked until Baekhyun’s pout wore him down. “Okay, Myongryong,” he said, tapping the puppy, “up.”

  
  Myongryong moved over dutifully and left space for Baekhyun to snuggle into his boyfriend.

  
  “You guys are gross,” said Hajin. 

  “Oh, shut up, cynical teenager,” teased her brother.

  
  “Anyway,” she continued, “can we watch my favorite new drama?”

  
  “What is it?” asked Chanyeol.

  “It’s called Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bokjoo. It’s really sweet and good.”

  
  “Why not?” figured Baekhyun, “can we start from the beginning though?”

  
  As they watched, Hajin coaxed Myongryong over by her and started trying to braid his short fur without much success. Inspired, Baekhyun braided his sister’s hair for her and Chanyeol soon followed, messing with Baekhyun’s hair until he had to ask Hajin for an explanation of how to braid. He still gave up after a few minutes of failure.

  
  “Aish, this is so straight,” complained Chanyeol, “it’s cute though.”

  
  “Isn’t Nam Joohyuk just dreamy, oppa?” Hajin asked her brother. Fawning over actors together was their usual routine while watching TV.

  
  “Sure is,” agreed Baekhyun. 

  Chanyeol cleared his throat. “I’m right here, babe.”

    
  Baekhyun laughed and kissed his boyfriend’s cheek. “Not as dreamy as you, of course.”

  
  Chanyeol just looked at him slyly. “You’re lucky you’re so cute.”

  
  The chicken arrived and they ate it around the coffee table while binge-watching Weightlifting.

  
  Chanyeol kept chastising Hajin for putting her greasy hands on his couch, and they all had to stop Myongryong from jumping on the food.

  
  The next morning, Hajin awoke in the guestroom. It was large enough to dance around in if she felt like it, but it was minimally decorated and painted all white, which she didn’t like as much as her cluttered purple room at home. When she walked into the kitchen, Baekhyun was cooking eggs and toast on the stove while Chanyeol hugged him from behind. They were speaking softly to each other and giggling.

  
  “Are you two always this PDA?” asked Hajin, rubbing her eyes.

  
  Chanyeol and Baekhyun whipped around with large, embarrassed expressions.

  
  “Hi, sis!” stuttered Baekhyun, “want some eggs?”

  
  Hajin continued, “because my boyfriend and I would never be this handsy around people.”

  
  Baekhyun’s jaw dropped and Chanyeol started to crack up. “Excuse you boyfriend???” exclaimed Baekhyun.

  “Yup,” said Hajin, smugly as she sat at the breakfast table, “the boy I told you guys about.”

  
  “Okay,” began Chanyeol, “so who’s advice worked?”

  
  “Baek’s; although I tried your idea first, Chanyeol-ah.”

  
  Baekhyun looked indignant. “You took his advice first? I’m your brother you’re supposed to trust me!”

  
  Hajin just shrugged, prompting another outburst of laughter from Chanyeol. 

  “Anyway, you’re too young to be dating. Do appa and eomma know?”

  
  “Ah, sorta,” answered Hajin.

  Baekhyun looked skeptical. “What does that mean?”

  
  “It means,” replied Hajin as Chanyeol passed her a plate of food, “don’t tell them yet.”

  
  “Fine,” said Baekhyun. 

  The two men sat down to eat and Myongryong traipsed in, weaving between everyone’s legs and eliciting lots of affection.

  
  “Okay,” began Baekhyun, his mouth full of egg and his hands gesturing with his silver wear, “so I’m going to work at the studio today. I have lessons –”

  
  “Oh,” interrupted Hajin, “does that mean you’re done being a housewife? You have a real job now?”

  
  Chanyeol could hardly contain his laughter. Baekhyun shot both his table-mates warning glances.

  
  “As I was saying,” Baekhyun continued, “I’m working and Chanyeol-ssi has a meeting later today, so I was thinking I’d take you with me, Jinnie.” 

  “Why can’t I stay here?"

  
  “Wouldn’t you get bored?”

  
  “Also,” added Chanyeol, “I – well I have a lot of expensive stuff in this apartment…”

  
  “He’s saying he doesn’t want you to break his shit,” translated Baekhyun.   
Hajin scowled at Chanyeol, who tried to apologize with puppy eyes for his boyfriend’s bluntness.

  
  “C’mon, Haji, it’ll be fun,” Baekhyun assured, “you can take Myongryong and walk around with him and I’ll give you some cash to go get a treat or something, yah?”

  
  Hajin considered her brother’s offer, then finally gave in. “Yeah, okay.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Happy New Year! So, uh, I'm not dead, it's just that college is a bitch lol. Here's a long-awaited next chapter and more should be coming soon. Don't worry I intend to finish this story goddamnit! I know the last chapter was super domestic and pure so uh, have some smut now I guess. Hope y'all had a good holiday and have been enjoying exo's winter album (I cannot stop listening it's so good!). For those of you who just went through finals, I can only hope that it went as well as it did for Baekhyun in this chapter ;)

Chanyeol wanted to go on a date, but Baekhyun had finals to study for.  It was May of senior year after all.  But Chanyeol had sly ways of getting things to go how he wanted.  Baekhyun felt a buzz in his phone and pulled the device from his pocket as he walked from his voice class to his dorm.  It was a text from Chanyeol:

               C: Babyyyyy I miss you

               B: Miss you too channie <3

               C: Come over?

               B: I wish.  Have to study.

               C: I can help ;)  

               Baekhyun sighed.  The suggestion was something H often used on him.  It was undeniably fuckboy-ish but somehow when it came from Chanyeol, Baekhyun didn’t find it bothersome.  He looked back to his messages. 

               B: Okay

               C: Yay!  I’ll pick you up and we can have dinner later! 

               Chanyeol showed up fifteen minutes afterwards in the parking lot by the upper-classmen dorms with a grin on his face.  Baekhyun climbed into the passenger seat of the Mercedes and plopped his backpack onto his lap, casting a suspicious glance at Chanyeol’s enthusiasm.  Then he looked out the window and noticed Jongdae walking down the sidewalk.  He ducked behind the door in an attempt to hide, but it was too late. 

               “Eeeeyyyyy, Baekhyun-ah!” shouted Jongdae, shooting a sly smile towards the car. 

               Baekhyun turned red and Chanyeol waved like the Cheshire Cat out the window, bending so he could see. 

               “Hey!  Guy from the bar!” remarked Jongdae, “where are you off to?”   

               “I’m helping him study,” explained Chanyeol.

               Jongdae added a raised eyebrow to his smirk.  “Is that so?  Have fun!  Be safe!” he said, and he waved the car off as Baekhyun covered his eyes in embarrassment.  Chanyeol reached a hand to Baekhyun and the smaller man took it, plaiting their fingers together to ground himself.  Baekhyun relaxed and let himself smile.  He had to admit it was nice having his friend’s approval.   

               Baekhyun had a feeling Chanyeol had something up his sleeve from the way he had been acting, but he hadn’t expected this; he hadn’t expected to end up in Chanyeol’s study, hands splayed against the chalky wood of his boyfriend’s immaculate desk, school work scattered in front of him, with Chanyeol’s dick up his ass.  It had started innocently enough:  Chanyeol sat down at his desk, relaxing into the way the back of his glossy, low chair curved like an arm around his shoulders.  He smiled at Baekhyun and moved a sleepy hand to brush away a stray strand of hair.  The skyline out the window behind him was teal and hazy, like an impressionist painting of Blade Runner but with better weather. 

               “Come here,” said Chanyeol, patting his lap.

               Baekhyun stared flatly, still clutching his backpack.  “I’m an adult,” he said, “may I have my own chair?” 

               Chanyeol pouted in response.  “Baekkieee~” he whined, “you could, but I haven’t seen my boy in so long.  I missed you and I was hoping you’d indulge me.  Besides,” he added, “you’ve missed me too, haven’t you?” 

               Baekhyun tried to maintain a hard shell on the outside but the truth was Chanyeol’s words were melting his insides to mush.  He let himself smile breathily as he conceded and sat on Chanyeol’s lap, spreading his study material, a lengthy practice test, out for him to asses. 

               “That’s my baby,” cooed Chanyeol, turning his attention to the practice test questions.  “Music theory, huh?  Hm, is this multiple choice?”

               “Yup.” 

               Chanyeol laid out the instructions for what was going to happen.  Chanyeol would ask the questions and Baekhyun would answer.  If Baekhyun was correct, he would receive a kiss as a reward.  Baekhyun seemed flustered in the beginning, turning red and batting his eyelashes as Chanyeol bestowed the first kiss on the side of his neck.  Pretty soon though, they found a rhythm.  Baekhyun missed the occasional question, but he had already studied a lot and knew most of the answers, so he ended up with one of Chanyeol’s arms wrapped around his waist, receiving intermittent kisses of encouragement everywhere from his palms, fingers, and knuckles to his neck and cheeks – none on the lips though since it was difficult for Chanyeol to reach.  

               After a question about soundwaves, Chanyeol was getting a little carried away.  His lips moved hungrily over Baekhyun’s neck.  Baekhyun let himself for the first time start to feel carried away too, as if a string were hoisting him into his mind from the bottom of his warming stomach. 

               “Ung – Yeollie – the test…”

               “I know, darling, just give me a bit,” explained Chanyeol in a rasp.  He trailed his kiss over the nape of Baekhyun’s neck and to the other side under his ear.  Baekhyun’s breath hitched as Chanyeol’s hands slipped over the skin of his lower abdomen. 

               “Be a good boy and rock your hips a little for me,” instructed Chanyeol, whispering.  Baekhyun felt his face flush, but he was dying for some friction, so he took the suggestion.  He could feel that he was getting Chanyeol worked up from the growing hardness under him and the grunting sounds escaping the larger man’s lips. 

               “Take off your pants,” directed Chanyeol, voice full of even more gravel than before, “I want to be inside you.”   

               “Yes sir,” replied Baekhyun.  The phrase escaped his lips so easily, he was almost embarrassed, but he could hardly think – Chanyeol was messing him up too much. 

               Chanyeol raised an eyebrow and dragged a smile over Baekhyun’s skin.  “Sir?” he teased. 

               Baekhyun’s face flushed but he smiled nonetheless.  “Well you’re the teacher, right?  So I should call you sir.” 

               So, that is how Baekhyun ended up here – being ruined over questions about quarter notes and the Phrygian mode.  Once the pants were off, Chanyeol changed the rules of the studying game: A kiss still marked a correct answer, but any time Baekhyun missed a question (or, for that matter, started to nod off from the sensation of his boyfriend inside him) Chanyeol would buck his hips up and give Baekhyun a torturously momentary jolt of pleasure.  There were a lot of questions.  This had been going on for a while. 

               Baekhyun felt the sting of his pen digging into the palm of his hand as it pressed into the table.  Chanyeol was just toying with him at this point; he leaned the test on Baekhyun’s back so he wouldn’t have to hold it, played with the smaller man’s left nipple in one hand, and his balls with the other – although never allowing his hardened cock even one therapeutic stroke.  Chanyeol kept asking the questions, relishing the choked whines and whimpers Baekhyun had to fight off to offer answers. 

               “Fuck, Channie,” groaned Baekhyun, his eyes squeezed shut, “you’re so bad at helping me focus…” He trailed off and bit his lip.  Tears started to make a jailbreak from the edges of his eyes.  He just wished Chanyeol would leave his balls alone for a second and do something to his cock. 

               “Last question, my lovely,” assured Chanyeol.

               Baekhyun’s face relaxed.  “Thank god.” 

               “You’ve been so good for me, dear – a model student.  You feel so nice and warm around me.” 

               “Thank you, sir.”

               “You’re practically sobbing.  Do you think you can make it to the end?”

               “Yes sir.” 

               The last question was about atonality.  Baekhyun smiled as he answered, knowing he was correct. 

               “Good job,” praised Chanyeol, petting Baekhyun’s hair and kissing him on his now exposed should blade.  Baekhyun sighed in relief.  “But,” _shit_ , “now before we can move on, we need to go over all the ones you missed until you get them.”   

               At this point Baekhyun really was sobbing, but he mewled in acceptance and got ready to review with a deep breath.  By the end, he sure as hell knew the correct response for every question on the practice test.

               It was finally over and Baekhyun could barely speak.  Chanyeol was getting frustrated himself at this point.  He set the test in front of Baekhyun on the desk and leaned around to kiss Baekhyun’s damp, flushed cheek. 

               “You were a very good boy for me,” whispered Chanyeol, “and you’re gonna ace your test, don’t you think?”

               Baekhyun bit his lip at the way his boyfriend drew his mouth over his skin and rocked his hips slightly.  “Mm hm,” he choked.   

               Chanyeol laughed.  “You’re cute,” he said, “and you did such a good job, I think you deserve a reward, hm?”

               “Please, sir.” 

               Much to Baekhyun’s delight, Chanyeol didn’t hesitate; he leaned him over the desk, stuck his fingers into Baekhyun’s mouth, and fucked him right there, giving lots of attention to the smaller man’s frustrated dick.  Baekhyun tried not to drool onto his practice test as he moaned around Chanyeol’s fingers. 

               Afterwards, they cleaned up and cuddled on the couch.  Chanyeol held Baekhyun and kissed him over and over, ruffling his hair and babbling praise and “I love you’s.”  Baekhyun was sleepy and brain-dead, so he let himself melt into his boyfriend. 

               “I love you too,” he said, “thanks for helping me study.” 

               “My pleasure.” 

               Baekhyun’s cheeks flushed as the next sentence passed his lips, and he could hardly make himself look up at Chanyeol.  Still, he figured, communicating honestly was somehow still working in this relationship. 

               “I…uh…” he began,” I liked calling you sir…”

               Baekhyun braced himself for a weird response, but instead Chanyeol’s voice seemed to soften even still and heat spread to his face, too. 

               “I liked it too,” he said, grinning. 

               Baekhyun let himself relinquish any small pent-up anxiety he had left and relaxed into the moment, relieved.  He still didn’t know what he had done to deserve this, but he was not about to question it. 

               “So,” began Chanyeol, “any more tests you need to study for?”

               Baekhyun giggled.  “Not now; I don’t think I could take much more of that.” 

               “But maybe later?” asked Chanyeol suggestively.

               “Of course, sir.” 

               Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun’s forehead and rolled up from the couch.  “Fantastic.  Now, let’s order some takeout, hm?” 

               Baekhyun stayed for round two that night and slept over.  When he got back to his dorm the next morning, he quizzed himself for retention on the things he had, um, studied with Chanyeol, and sure enough, he knew it all.  A few days later, he took the final and everything went swimmingly.  The only problem was that he had to try and prevent the conditioned boner that kept threatening to ruin his concentration.  


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's another chapter! It also has smut I'll calm down after this lol. If you've seen that one bowling vlive they did summer 2016 (I hope you have) this was partially inspired by that. Enjoy!

Baekhyun was the first one to arrive at the restaurant.  Waiting in the entrance, his new mohair coat made him too hot, but when he took it off, the hairs on his arms perked up and he had to rub at them.  He didn’t know which temperature was more uncomfortable, so he just kept the coat off.  Baekhyun’s round glasses began slipping down the rim of his nose, and he pushed them back up with his index finger as the host asked if he had a reservation. 

“Ah, yeah,” he answered, “should be under Byun?  For, uh, twelve?”

The host smiled and flicked her pen against her clipboard.  This was Baekhyun’s favorite sushi place and he knew the staff were familiar with him and his friends. 

“We’re getting the tatami room ready for you guys.  You can wait here for your friends.  Can I take your coat?”

“Oh, ah, sure,” said Baekhyun, handing over the garment for the host to hang in an adjacent closet.  Baekhyun was nervous and processing things slowly.  He didn’t know why; he was proud to call Chanyeol his and wanted nothing more than to integrate him into the rest of his social life, but the thought was still making Baekhyun jittery.

Kyungsoo, Jongin, and Yixing were the first to show up, all together.

“Long time no see,” said Yixing.

“Yeah,” agreed Baekhyun, matching his friend’s sarcasm, “by the way, hyung, did you pick up more milk today?” Baekhyun asked his roommate. 

“Yes, Baek, I took care of it.”  If Baekhyun and Chanyeol were the giddy young lovers, Baekhyun and Yixing were the tired middle-aged vanilla couple who don’t mess around and fret over milk.  It was the perfect roommate relationship. 

“Sorry,” teased Baekhyun, “you’re kinda spacy sometimes.” 

Yixing just sighed at this.  “Excuse me for double-majoring.  Maybe you can take over grocery-shopping if you’re so concerned about me.”

“Hate to interrupt,” said Kyungsoo, “but Hyuuuung,” he wiggled his eyebrows at Baekhyun conspiratorially, “where’s your man?”

“On his way,” assured Baekhyun as his lips skittered into a smile. 

“Hyung,” said Jongin, looking put-off, “why is your shirt so big?”

“Yeah, you’re swimming in that thing.  It looks good though,” observed Yixing.   

Baekhyun’s friends were all examining him and he felt self-conscious.  He rubbed at his elbows. 

“Um, it’s Chanyeol’s,” he answered, embarrassed. 

The three other men smiled knowingly.  

“That’s cute,” said Kyungsoo, his lips forming a heart shape as he shot a look of mock-irritation at his boyfriend. 

“Jongin always says I’d look good in his stuff, then when I borrow something it’s inevitably what he was planning to wear and he gets upset.  Isn’t that right, Jonginnie?” 

Jongin smirked and sent a sharp glance to his boyfriend, making Kyungsoo blush.  He was certainly a man with two sides. 

“Maybe I’ll just have to decide what you wear from now on, hm?”  They both giggled. 

Yixing heaved a sigh and Baekhyun tugged at his sleeves, still too antsy to be made uncomfortable by his friends.  Besides, he knew he had no right to judge; he and Chanyeol were just as bad. 

Cold air seeped through the door as Kris and Zitao slipped inside, shivering against each other.

“Brrrrrr!” chimed Zitao.  Baekhyun could almost imagine icicles growing from Zitao’s earrings. 

“Hey guys!” said Kris, his voice seeming to spread out and cover all the shorter men. 

“Baek-ah!” began Zitao, “where’s your sugar daddy?”

Baekhyun rolled his eyes at the question and crossed his arms.  “He’ll be here soon.” 

“Do we have a table?” interrupted Kris.

“It’s being set up,” assured Baekhyun as he bounced his leg, trying to get the nerves to dissipate.    

Baekhyun was only peripherally aware of the door opening, letting in a figure shrouded in cold air, before he felt a chilled arm drape over his shoulder and a tall presence cloak him protectively.  He looked up and felt a little comfort in his nerves as Chanyeol smiled down at him. 

“Nice shirt,” snarked Chanyeol sweetly in his deep voice as he kissed Baekhyun’s forehead, “now are you going to introduce me?”

Everyone was gazing at the tall man, apparently impressed by his suave aura.   _If only they knew how much of a dork he is_ , thought Baekhyun, hoping his boyfriend wouldn’t try to act too cool all night.  Baekhyun went down the line, introducing everyone one by one, and each gave a little nod with a smile and waved. 

“So nice to meet you guys!” said Chanyeol with a bow and wave once Baekhyun was done, “I’ve heard such great things about all of you.” 

The host returned and set down her clipboard.  “I know you’re still missing people, but do you mind if I take you to your table now?  Also, can I gather your coats?” 

They were led to the tatami room at the side of the restaurant and sat down around the wooden table on thin pillow mats, some cross-legged and some slipping their legs into the shallow cavern underneath.  The room had paper walls supported by thin, cross-hatched beams which made a single sliding door.  It was very private and intimate.  Baekhyun thought it was like being inside a lantern.  Chanyeol and Baekhyun sat next to each other and Chanyeol looked around, grinned, and bumped his shoulder excitedly against Baekhyun’s.  Baekhyun could feel himself relax.  There was the dorkiness.

“Sake for the table?” asked Kris, thumbing through the drink menu, “unless anyone wants beer?”

“It’s too cold for beer,” said Kyungsoo. 

The door slid open with a papery hush after they ordered the sake and in walked the shivering trio of Junmyeon, Sehun, and Jongdae. 

“Eeeeh!” greeted Jongdae, looking at Chanyeol, “I know you!” 

Sehun looked annoyed.  “You two have met before?  This is Chanyeol, right?”

“Yeah,” explained Chanyeol, “that’s me,” then added, gesturing to Jongdae, “we met when we were dealing with a drunken Baekkie.”  Chanyeol looked playfully at his mortified boyfriend – a golden retriever-style smile spreading over his lips. 

“We only talked for like three seconds,” said Jongdae, sitting down, “and I didn’t know you were a millionaire at that point.” 

Chanyeol just shrugged uncomfortably. 

“Why was Baekhyun drunk?” asked Junmyeon, concern blanketing his face.

Jongdae smiled mischievously.  “Ask Chanyeol.” 

Chanyeol put up his wide hands, trying to defend himself, “sorry,” he said, “Baekhyun didn’t tell me he was a lightweight until I’d already ordered his drink.” 

Everyone laughed; probably imagining Chanyeol’s surprise by the whole situation. 

“I wasn’t in a great place, okay?” said Baekhyun, “I was being an idiot.”

“Hey,” quipped Sehun, “what else is new?”  He and Baekhyun shared a friendly smile at the taunt. 

“Who’s the obnox?” asked Chanyeol, gesturing to Sehun. 

“Oh!” said Baekhyun, scrambling to introduce the new arrivals, “that’s Sehun.  He’s the baby; only a sophomore,” Sehun smiled, “that’s Junmyeon,” Junmyeon nodded, “and you’ve already met Jongdae.”  Jongdae waved and gave his cat-like eye-smile. 

“We ordered sake already,” Zitao told the three late-arrivals, then let out a groan of annoyance as the door opened one last time and Minseok and Luhan slipped in, hand in hand.  They stared at Zitao in confusion as they found their seats. 

“As I was _saying_ ,” continued Zitao venomously, displaying his dramatic nature, “sake is on the way.”

“Sweet,” said Minseok, “get this party started.” 

“This is Minseok and Luhan,” Baekhyun told Chanyeol, “Minseok is the oldest even though he looks five.  Even so, he’s not as responsible as Junmyeon.  He’s a party animal, isn’t that right, Minseok?”

Minseok just shrugged, not necessarily disagreeing. 

“So,” Luhan began, “is this the sugar daddy?”

Chanyeol burst into laughter and Baekhyun’s face bloomed crimson.     

“Aaah, Lu-ge~” he whined in annoyance.   

“That’s me!” said Chanyeol, grabbing Baekhyun’s hand under the table. 

“Hey!” yelled Kyungsoo, squinting at the sushi menu, “what are we ordering?” 

“Do they have chicken?” asked Jongin, leaning into his boyfriend. 

Kyungsoo glared deeper into the paper.  “I can’t read it, Jonginnie, do you have my glasses?” 

“How about you decide some things we can share, Kyungsoo-ah?” suggested Junmyeon sweetly, “I mean you’re the one who almost went to culinary school.”

“No~” pouted Baekhyun, “last time we let him order he got stewed cucumbers and like ten other dishes with cucumbers.  I couldn’t eat anything.” 

Kyungsoo, horn-rim glasses now in hand, shot Baekhyun a dirty look. 

“Oh my _god_ ,” sighed Kris, dragging his hands over his cheeks in exasperation. 

“How about this,” offered Yixing before anyone could get too fed-up, which was wont to happen in this group.  “Everyone find something that looks good and we can all share whatever we want.”

Everyone nodded shallowly, making small sounds of agreement. 

“Sorry, Chanyeol,” said Sehun with a smile, “we’re more fun when we’re not hungry.” 

Chanyeol chuckled.  “That’s understandable.” 

“Don’t get too comfortable, though,” added Minseok, “the interrogation will start later.” 

Baekhyun rolled his eyes as Chanyeol laughed again, unfazed.  “Aigoo.”

After a lot more bickering and compromising, everyone was satisfied with the order.  The sake came and everyone toasted.  Baekhyun took a few sips from Chanyeol’s cup, the clear liquid warming his insides and diffusing the knot of anxiety in his gut.  Everything was exceedingly normal; _too_ normal, he thought.

“So, Chanyeol,” began Minseok, “tell us your meeting story?  Baekhyun was super vague about it.” 

_Here we go_.  Chanyeol shot Baekhyun a surprised glance which made his boyfriend turn away, but he quickly softened at the sight of Baekhyun’s flushed cheeks. 

“Well,” he began, “I was feeling lonely and down and cold one night,”

“As millionaires are wont to,” interrupted Sehun in a snarky tone.  Chanyeol only smiled at him as Baekhyun made an exasperated face at his friend. 

“Actually, Sehun, I don’t want to sound like an ass, but I’d argue that wealth breeds loneliness.”

“I could see that,” chimed Junmyeon.  The others all looked annoyed at the interruption. 

“Let the man talk!” snapped Zitao. 

“Go on,” nudged Kyungsoo. 

“Anyway,” Chanyeol restarted, “I decided to walk through the mall and, lo and behold, Baekhyun had a gig that night playing Christmas carols.”  Chanyeol wrapped his arms around Baekhyun’s shoulder and looked at him with his puppy grin again.  “Needless to say, I was bewitched.  I didn’t expect to see the most beautiful man on earth that night.” 

Baekhyun swatted at Chanyeol’s shoulder in mortification.  “Yeollie, that’s enough.” 

Chanyeol ripped his focus from Baekhyun.  “So, I asked him out, we had dinner, and then he declined a ride home in case I was like an axe murderer or something.  But then he _ghosted_ me for like two weeks.”  

“For real?” asked Yixing indignantly. 

“Baek, you’re even dumber than I thought,” remarked Kris casually, taking a swing of sake. 

“Be nice,” chided Junmyeon.  Then Minseok added,

“Yeah, the poor kid was traumatized after you-know-who.” 

Everyone nodded in agreement.  His friends and boyfriend seemed to be doing all the talking for him, so Baekhyun decided to get some of his own perspective on the table.

“But I ran into him at a club while I was with Jongdae and we hooked up.  Then I got really drunk.  Because as you know I am not just anxious, but also super classy.”  Baekhyun laughed. 

“Yeah,” Kyungsoo agreed, “that sounds like you.” 

“So tell us,” prompted Luhan, “are you guys really happy?  You seem it.  I must say, Chanyeol-ah, we’re all inclined to like you since you’re helping our Baekkie so much.  You better not fuck up.”

Chanyeol smiled again, still unfazed by the warning.  “Noted,” he said casually.  “But yes, we are.” 

“So happy,” agreed Baekhyun, flashing an eye-smile up at his boyfriend as he giggled silently.  Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun’s cheek.  Sehun pretended to gag at the sweetness. 

Luhan wasn’t done though.  He took a sip of sake and raised an eyebrow teasingly.

“And how’s the sex life?  You’re obviously smitten with each other, I mean you can hardly keep your hands of one another.” 

Minseok elbowed Luhan in the ribs.  “Why do you care?”

Chanyeol just grimaced in amusement as Baekhyun went for damage control.  “It’s okay.  We all know Luhan-ssi is a pervert.  It’s fine.  Sorry, Yeollie.”  He made sure to give Luhan a pointed look not to take the joking any farther.  Chanyeol, however, was not cooperating. 

“Oh, it’s fantastic!” he boasted.  Baekhyun’s face blanched before filling itself in with pink. 

“Chanyeol-ssi!” 

“Oh, come on,” said Zitao, “you’re only acting scandalized for show, Baek.  We know you love it when people brag about you.” 

Baekhyun’s only response was a strangled groan.  His company was not letting him off easy. 

“Okay!” chimed Junmyeon, “I think we’ve all heard enough before this goes any further.  Change of subject?”

This was made easy as the food arrived.  Baekhyun silently thanked the heavens for the small break.    

After dinner, no one was ready to go home, and somewhere along the line, late-night bowling was suggested. 

“Oh, hell yes!” said Chanyeol.  Bowling was one dumb little enthusiasm that Baekhyun and his boyfriend shared.  At the bowling alley, about half the boys decided to amp up the fun with shots of soju.  Chanyeol was one of them, and he offered to cover the drinks.  Baekhyun did not partake.  He jumped up and down as he heard echoes of “geonbae!” from the bar area. 

Baekhyun didn’t need alcohol to get intense and hyped over bowling.  He considered himself quite a talented bowler, although on what evidence that perception was based, no one was quite sure.  Baekhyun jumped up and down and practiced his form as everyone gathered at the lane.  They did rock, paper, scissors to decide teams for the first round, losers on one team, winners on the other.  Baekhyun and Chanyeol both won. 

“Doesn’t this already create expectations?  Dividing teams this way?” wondered Yixing after losing to Kris, to which the taller man replied,

“Consider it a chip on your shoulder.” 

The teams ended up divided as follows: The winners (as they chose to call themselves) were Chanyeol, Baekhyun, Kris, Kyungsoo, Jongin, and Sehun; and the ‘underdogs’ were Minseok, Jongdae, Junmyeon, Luhan, Yixing, and Zitao. 

“Winners go first!” announced Baekhyun, walking sassily to choose a bowling ball. 

“Why is he like this?” whined Luhan, incredulous, “he’s not even buzzed!”     

“Eh, eh, hold up!” snapped Zitao, pitching himself towards Baekhyun in an effort to intimidate, “says who?”

“Says logic, loser!” insisted Baekhyun, his face sparking gleefully at the confrontation. 

“Oh, man.  Here we go,” said Kris.

“No, hyung,” said Zitao, “it’s a concession for losing!  We get to go first.  Get out of my face, little bitch.”

Baekhyun just laughed.  “You went from ‘hyung’ to ‘little bitch’ really quick.  Why do you care, anyway?  Am I hurting your fragile ego, Tao?” 

“ _Wode tian na!_ ”

At this point, everyone was getting involved in their own way. 

“What do you think?” said Baekhyun, turning to his team. 

“I think we should go first,” said Kyungsoo, calmly, his arms crossed as he sat in patience. 

“I agree,” said Jongin, sharing a smile with his boyfriend. 

“We’re the winners,” concurred Sehun, leaning against the wall in casual elegance.  Kris and Chanyeol, the two giants, stood together, Kris explaining to Chanyeol that his boyfriend’s behavior was completely normal in situations like this. 

“Oh, shut up you guys!” yelled Zitao, growing exasperated. 

“This is really dumb,” said Minseok.

“Yeah, Tao, it doesn’t matter,” agreed Junmyeon.  Yixing and Luhan also looked ready to give in.  Baekhyun noticed this and let out an obnoxiously loud cackle. 

“You need a more loyal team!” he teased. 

“Eeeeeeh, Chanyeol!” screamed Jongdae, “collect your man, please!” 

Chanyeol perked up and made his way over to Baekhyun, who was still gloating.  Before Baekhyun could figure out what was happening, Chanyeol’s lips were on his, silencing his taunts.  When Chanyeol pulled away, Baekhyun just stared at him in surprise.  The taller man leaned down again to boop his nose against his boyfriend’s blushy one. 

“Oh,” said Baekhyun with a smile. 

“Wow,” said Jongdae, “I wish it was that easy for us to shut him up.”

Chanyeol bowed but then pointed a warning finger at Jongdae.  “Stay away from my boyfriend!” 

Jongdae held up his splayed hands and nodded in assurance.  Zitao had taken advantage of the distraction to pick up a magenta ball and he was preparing to hurl it down the lane. 

“Hey!” yelled Baekhyun, but it was too late.  He pouted up at Chanyeol, who’s arm was still around his waist.  “Chanyeollie!  We’re on the same team~” he whined. 

“It’s okay,” whispered Chanyeol with a calming smile.  “It doesn’t matter who goes first.” 

“Fine,” pouted Baekhyun, letting Chanyeol pull him back and set him on the larger man’s lap.  The kiss set a fire under Baekhyun’s ass though.  He wanted to get Chanyeol back, and knew he could do that by teasing and flirting mercilessly.  Chanyeol was in for it. 

“I bet you didn’t anticipate this kind of extra-ness in your boyfriend, huh Chanyeol?” said Minseok. 

“I did not,” agreed Chanyeol as Zitao took his second go at the pins (the first had rolled into the gutter, causing a disappointed uproar from the underdogs). 

“I have to live with it,” said Yixing.

Chanyeol just laughed.  “I’m jealous.” 

Baekhyun wiggled his butt down against Chanyeol’s crotch and felt his boyfriend’s body flinch in surprise.  Baekhyun smirked to himself.   _Success_.         

The night proceeded apace.  There was more soju, which probably facilitated much of the bickering, taunting, and creativity with form which followed.  Junmyeon developed a style where he squatted with his legs wide and then chucked the bowling ball forward underhand with two arms.  The ball careened through the air and landed on the lane with a thunderous plunk which had everyone worried they would damage the wood.  It ended up being strangely accurate though. 

Kris decided to join the fun by facing away from the lane and shoving the ball through his impressively long legs, although he was barely flexible enough to do so.  This was not nearly as effective. 

Chanyeol, who was a relatively solid bowler, wanted to try and help Baekhyun with his own bizarre technique.  He was sick of watching his boyfriend nearly dislocate his arm on the follow-through each time his turn came up, but it was also an excuse to get close to the smaller man and brush against his elegant limbs. 

Chanyeol fixed himself around Baekhyun and moved the younger’s body in the exact ways it should go to not kill his shoulder, so that Baekhyun could feel the correct technique firsthand before trying it out. 

“Does that make sense?” asked Chanyeol. 

Baekhyun was thankful that all his friends were wrapped up in the game; it gave him lots of privacy to enact his plan.  He slipped his hand onto Chanyeol’s thigh and squeezed. 

“Yes master,” he said with sparkling eyes and a devilish grin. 

Chanyeol’s eyes widened and he turned bright red. 

“Baek, what the fuck?” he blurted. 

“What?” asked Baekhyun, false-innocence coating his voice like powdered sugar as he rocked his shoulders side to side, “you’re the bowling master.  That’s why I let you teach me;” he inched closer to Chanyeol as he spoke, then nibbled softly at Chanyeol’s earlobe to punctuate the thought; “isn’t it?” 

Then he backed away slow and barely averted being caught by Chanyeol greedily reaching for him.  He gave one look back at his boyfriend and caught Chanyeol simply staring, blush draining from his face and a look of annoyance and determination setting over his expression.  Baekhyun smiled and winked. 

After a few more turns, including a strike from Chanyeol, the first round was over, the winners proving victorious.  For a second round, they switched up the teams.

“Boyfriends have to split up!” demanded Jongdae.  Apparently, Baekhyun had not been flirting as discreetly as he had thought.  Baekhyun and Chanyeol parted ways with pouts plastered on their faces, and as he was turning to his team, Baekhyun declared, “winner tops tonight!” 

Chanyeol spluttered as everyone laughed in disbelief. 

“Baekhyun-ah!  Are you serious?” asked Chanyeol, incredulous. 

“Completely,” Baekhyun replied. 

“Then you’re on, babe.” 

“Ooooooh!” yelled Jongdae to Chanyeol’s team, loving the drama, “you guys better win!”  

Baekhyun hit a spare, and his team got ahead quickly.

“Aigoooo~” whined Chanyeol, “I shouldn’t have fixed your technique!”

Baekhyun just wiggled his eyebrows in response. 

“You’ve created a monster, Chanyeol-ah,” joked Minseok.  Then, Kris jumped in:

“Yeah, do you think you can handle him tonight?”

Chanyeol set his brow in determination.  “Alright, Byun,” he began, choosing a green ball from the rack, “don’t get so cocky.”  Chanyeol was quickly distracted though, a pout setting over his face as he stared at his bowling ball. 

“What the heck?  The finger-holes are too small!” he complained as he went back to find one with a better fit. 

“Oh, come on,” Luhan jested, “if your fingers can fit in Baek, I’m sure they can fit in those holes.” 

Everyone laughed save Chanyeol, who picked a different green ball and threw it down the lane with aggression, screaming the entire time (although a smile remained plastered to his face).  It petered out and barely clipped one pin.  Chanyeol took his second shot, frustration brewing in him as everyone else tried to hype him into a frenzy.  This shot missed entirely, and Chanyeol dropped onto his back on the floor in one dramatic gesture of failure. 

Baekhyun stared at his boyfriend writhing on the ground, a smile spreading across his lips.  He almost felt bad.  Almost.  Instead of pity the older man though, he simply took a step nonchalantly up and down over Chanyeol’s chest, causing the human stepping stone to cry out in pain, half real and half feigned. 

“You’re in for a wild ride tonight if you don’t get your shit together, dear” he taunted. 

Chanyeol groaned. 

“Waaaaaah!” exclaimed Jongin, impressed, “you really are good for him, Chanyeol-ah.  He hasn’t been like this in months.” 

“Ah, waaaeee…” muttered Chanyeol softly in response.

“Oh please,” said Baekhyun, “you sound like Jongdae.  You don’t want to be a whiny bitch like him.  Get up and prove your dominance if you want it.” 

Jongdae rolled his eyes.  “You know I can hear you, right Baek?”

“What even is going on right now?” asked Kris, sitting down and crossing his arms. 

Kyungsoo came through the scene, stepping gingerly over Chanyeol.  “Excuse me.  I’m just gonna take my turn now if you guys don’t mind.”  The poor guy was just trying to bowl calmly.

Kyungsoo, who had been doing pretty solidly all night, had an uncharacteristically poor showing this turn, giving Chanyeol’s team a chance to even the score.  

“Soo-yah, with that effort I’d think you were a secret agent,” jested Baekhyun.  Kyungsoo wheeled around with his eyes wide and teeth clenched, looking like he was restraining an urge to punch his tormentor, but he managed to refrain when Jongin took his hands in comfort. 

Chanyeol took another shot of soju and shook out his limbs to limber up before his next play.  In short, Chanyeol lead his team to an impressive comeback.  Uninhibited, he became their most intense cheerleader.  When it was over, Baekhyun set his jaw and adopted a petulant accent to his voice.

“Good,” he said, “I didn’t really want to top anyway.”  

***

As soon as they walked in the door or Chanyeol’s apartment and started taking off their wet coats, Chanyeol shot Baekhyun an exasperated look, although Baekhyun noted he was smiling at the same time. 

“You little tease!” Chanyeol exclaimed while turning on more lights. 

Baekhyun could hardly hide his satisfaction.  “I have no idea what you are referring to,” he said, batting his eyelashes in false innocence. 

“You were teasing and flirting with me that whole time!  You were trying to get me to fuck you!”

Baekhyun couldn’t stop laughing at Chanyeol’s frustration, but he didn’t put up any resistance when the larger man walked over to him, grabbed his wrist, and pulled him towards the bedroom. 

“Alright, just take your clothes off already,” ordered Chanyeol.  Baekhyun started stripping, leaving his clothes on the floor, feeling honestly very proud of how well his plan had worked.  He liked when Chanyeol got bossy and dominant, although he was slightly annoyed with how hard it was making him already.  He decided he would need to calm himself down a little if he wanted to last. 

“Alright baby,” said Chanyeol in a slightly softer voice, “lay down, arms above your head.  I want you to keep them there, okay?”  

“Yes sir,” said Baekhyun, as he did as he was told. 

Chanyeol, who was still in his boxers but nothing else, left one small light on in the corner and walked over to Baekhyun with a pleased smile.  Baekhyun thought with the light on, that his boyfriend looked like some glowing treasure; like gold.

“Good boy,” praised Chanyeol as he knelt and kissed Baekhyun hard on the mouth and ran his hands through Baekhyun’s hair.  Then he moved on to kissing along Baekhyun’s neck, then down to his chest and stomach.  Chanyeol let his hands slip over whatever skin his lips weren’t busy roaming.  Every few kisses, Baekhyun released a soft, airy groan, and when they reached very low on his stomach, he couldn’t stand it anymore.  Without thinking, his arms reached down – for what he was not quite sure.  He wanted to touch Chanyeol; he wanted to touch himself. 

Immediately though, Chanyeol stopped, took Baekhyun’s hands in his right hand, and pinned them back over Baekhyun’s head where they had started. 

“Nice try, baby,” teased Chanyeol, “just relax and let me make you feel good.” 

Baekhyun could feel that his face was flushed, and he tried not to whine as he spoke.  “Ah, you’re teasing me.” 

Chanyeol ghosted his left hand over Baekhyun’s skin.  

“This is payback,” was all he said.  Suddenly, both of Chanyeol’s hands were absent and Baekhyun heard the drawer next to the bed opening. 

“Don’t touch yourself,” added Chanyeol. 

“Yes sir,” repeated Baekhyun.  He heard the crack of the lube container lid and the sliding sound of Chanyeol applying it to his fingers.   _Finally_ , he thought.  

“Ready, baby?” asked Chanyeol.  Baekhyun nodded and took in a small breath as he felt Chanyeol’s finger inside him, working up and back.  Chanyeol now had his left hand in position to hold Baekhyun’s arms still.  Baekhyun kept his tension in his hands and squeezed Chanyeol’s grip, and Chanyeol enjoyed feeling Baekhyun’s pleasure through his slender fingers. 

Once it was getting easy, Chanyeol warned Baekhyun he was adding another finger and started searching around for Baekhyun’s prostate.  When he found it, Baekhyun’s whole body tensed against Chanyeol’s grip and he really moaned for the first time all night.  Chanyeol had to remind his boyfriend to relax, but by the way Baekhyun kept grinding his hips to try to coax Chanyeol’s fingers deeper and faster, Chanyeol knew he was going to need another hand available.  He slipped his fingers out of Baekhyun, who shuddered from the loss, and got up to wash off his hands.  Baekhyun just lay breathless and wilting on the bed. 

“Where are you going?  Yeollie, why’d you stop?”

“Because you’re not cooperating, baby.  I’ll be back in a sec; I have an idea.” 

“Ah, Yeollie, you’re ruining the mood,” whined Baekhyun. 

“Trust me,” said Chanyeol, emerging with a long, soft towel, “this will not ruin the mood.” 

Chanyeol took the towel and used it to tie Baekhyun’s arms to the bedframe so they would stay put above him. 

“That’s better,” said Chanyeol as he reapplied the lube to his fingers. 

Baekhyun muttered, “hurry up, Chanyeollie,” which only tempted Chanyeol to take his sweet time.  But he didn’t wait too long.  He went back in slowly with three fingers, and Baekhyun simultaneously whimpered and quivered at the restoration of touch.  Chanyeol used his free hand to hold Baekhyun’s hips still so he wouldn’t try to move too much again.  Chanyeol leaned forward and kissed Baekhyun’s lips for the first time in a little while and Baekhyun kissed back eagerly. 

“Do you want to add a fourth now, baby?” asked Chanyeol.  Baekhyun nodded with a whine, and Chanyeol worked in another finger and started to pump it in and out without much fuss from Baekhyun. 

“You’re doing really well with this,” said Chanyeol as he rubbed Baekhyun’s hip in comfort, “good boy.”  He leaned down and kissed Baekhyun again several times all over his face.  He could feel that Baekhyun’s breath was shallow and he could see Baekhyun’s arm muscles working against the towel. 

“How are you doing, baby?” he asked, thinking he might know the answer. 

Baekhyun whispered hoarsely between grunts, “please fuck me already, Chanyeol.  I – ah – I need it.  Please, sir.”

Chanyeol chuckled softly as he removed his fingers and made Baekhyun moan with a sharp intake of breath.  “Fair enough baby.  How could I say no to that face?”  Chanyeol took a moment to shed his boxers and spread lube on his cock, leaving Baekhyun on the bed again, panting and wanting. 

When he was ready, Chanyeol looked back over to his boyfriend, who was eyeing Chanyeol’s dick and pouting aggressively. 

“Yeollie,” whined Baekhyun, “will you please untie me?” 

Chanyeol leaned over and kissed the pout off of Baekhyun’s lips.  “I suppose I can do that.” 

Once the towel was out of the way, Chanyeol added a small kiss to each of Baekhyun’s wrists.  “It didn’t rub uncomfortably or anything, did it?”

“No, it was soft,” said Baekhyun, “now will you please get on with this?”

“You have no patience,” Chanyeol chided with a syrupy grin as he leaned down one more time to kiss Baekhyun and suck a hickey into his collarbone, making the man below him bite his lip.  “Okay, baby, on your knees; ass up,” he said with a playful smack of Baekhyun’s thigh, and Baekhyun scrambled to comply, wanting to move things along.  “Yes, sir.”

Chanyeol slipped a hand down Baekhyun’s back as he lined himself up, then pushed himself in slowly, but without warning until he had bottomed out and Baekhyun’s thighs were trembling almost imperceptibly.  Baekhyun arched his back to help Chanyeol get a good angle.  Chanyeol and Baekhyun each let out a sigh of pleasure, and the low timbre of Chanyeol’s made Baekhyun’s entire body throb. 

Chanyeol’s hand slipped down all the way to ruffle Baekhyun’s hair.  “Good, baby?”

“Mm-hm, yes sir,” said Baekhyun with a nod of his head.  He took a breath to relax himself and gulped.  “Okay,” he said, “move.” 

Chanyeol pulled almost all the way back out, and as he started in again, a bit quicker this time but not much, Baekhyun let a hard moan trail past his lips. 

Chanyeol relocated his hands to Baekhyun’s hips.  “Aish, you are so loud!”

Baekhyun replied, voice hoarse and eyes closed, “I would have thought you’d be used to it by now, sir.”

Chanyeol laughed breathily.  “It just never ceases to surprise me.”  

“Chanyeooooolll,” pouted Baekhyun, “please stop with the hold-up, thank you.”    

“Sorry, sweetie.”  Chanyeol gripped Baekhyun’s hips and began to thrust in and out at a moderate pace and with each one, Baekhyun let out soft repetitions of “ah-ah,” and grabbed at the bedsheets, desperate for something to cling to as Chanyeol hit him perfectly in the sweet spot. 

Chanyeol closed his eyes.  “Mmm, Baek, you feel so good.”  He began to quicken his pace a little and knelt down over Baekhyun so he could just barely see the smaller man’s face.  Baekhyun’s eyes were closed, his cheeks were solid pink, and he kept biting his lips, trying to stop himself from drooling on the bed.  Chanyeol kept his left hand at Baekhyun’s hip but reached forward to place his right hand over Baekhyun’s clenched fist.  He whispered into Baekhyun’s ear. 

“Shh, baby, remember?  Relax.  I’ve got you.  Ah, you take me so well.” 

Baekhyun practically melted under the praise.  He turned his stiff palm upwards to hold Chanyeol’s hand and relaxed his head into the bed with a moan.  Chanyeol slipped meandering kisses over Baekhyun’s shoulders and neck, leaving purple love bites here and there as he went.  He felt Baekhyun’s right thumb rubbing back and forth over his own. 

“Ah, Chanyeol,” groaned Baekhyun into the pillow.  Chanyeol loved to hear Baekhyun moaning his full name during sex.  He leaned back and held Baekhyun to bring the smaller man with him so that they were both on their knees and Baekhyun was essentially on Chanyeol’s lap.  Chanyeol thrust up into Baekhyun, who’s eyes fluttered closed again as he panted.  Chanyeol steadied one hand on Baekhyun’s hip, guiding him, and slipped the other up Baekhyun’s chest.  Baekhyun shivered against the larger man until Chanyeol’s hand reached Baekhyun’s throat and rested over it softly, caressing with his fingers and holding Baekhyun’s head back.  Chanyeol looked down at the view of Baekhyun’s pink, shining face and the inverted arch of his eyebrows.  He slipped his hand up and down from Baekhyun’s hip to his inner thigh and back, causing Baekhyun to loll his head around and make some gulping noises of contentment in the back of his throat. 

Chanyeol was certainly enjoying the view.  “You look so pretty like this, baby,” he growled softly into Baekhyun’s ear.  Chanyeol moved his hand from Baekhyun’s throat and threaded it through his hair instead, getting a good grip to maneuver Baekhyun’s head into an angle where Chanyeol could reach his mouth.  Chanyeol pressed his lips over Baekhyun’s and kissed him with abandon as Baekhyun moaned into the kiss.  After a while, Chanyeol noticed that his boyfriend was working himself up and down on his dick; Chanyeol’s had apparently grown lazy during the passionate kiss.  Their lips broke, and Baekhyun continued, unbothered and whimpering softly.

Chanyeol let out a soft “mm,” and chuckled, ruffling Baekhyun’s hair.  “You can’t take it when I stop, can you baby?  Sorry I got sidetracked.  You like fucking yourself on my cock, don’t you?”

Baekhyun didn’t respond, so Chanyeol just let him enjoy himself.  He took one of Baekhyun’s hands as Baekhyun finally spoke between fluttering breathes. 

“Ungh, I’m close, Yeollie.”   

“Me too.  Do you wanna come, baby?” asked Chanyeol in a gruff voice, thrusting back into Baekhyun and eliciting a full sob of pleasure from the small man.  Baekhyun squeezed Chanyeol’s hand.

“Mm-hm, mm-hm.  Yes, sir,” said Baekhyun absently. 

Chanyeol laughed slyly.  “Hm, I think you can do a little better than that, darling.  What was that?”

Baekhyun tried to breathe evenly as his face twitched in desperation.  “Please, sir.  I need it.  Ah, you make me feel so good, sir.  Please let me come, Chanyeol.  I – I can’t hold it much longer.  Please…”   

Baekhyun’s brows curved upwards and his words became muddled into a humming in his throat. 

Chanyeol was pleased with the effort.  He thrust harder into Baekhyun, causing the smaller man to yelp softly. 

“That’s better.  Mm, you’re so cute when you beg like that, angel.”

Chanyeol reached around to jerk Baekhyun off, and Baekhyun’s breath hitched in his throat. 

“You’re so hard, baby,” remarked Chanyeol, somewhat obviously. 

Baekhyun began to moan in a thick stream of sound like honey dripping from a spoon. 

“Oh, Chanyeol.”

He thought he saw flashes of bright white, blue, and deep red under his eyelids at all the overwhelming sensory pleasure, and it concentrated in his brain and abdomen as he felt himself go loose and come undone under Chanyeol’s touch. 

“Come for me,” whispered Chanyeol, and Baekhyun ended up coming a little bit on himself, but mostly on the bed.  Baekhyun relaxed into Chanyeol, panting, as the larger man greedily rocked himself to his own orgasm, filling Baekhyun when he finished. 

After, the two men did not move for several long moments.  Baekhyun enjoyed the way Chanyeol wrapped his long, comforting arms around him and pulled him close.  Chanyeol kissed just below Baekhyun’s ear and Baekhyun sighed. 

“You did so well, Baek,” said Chanyeol, softly, “I’m so proud of you.”  He began to stroke Baekhyun’s bangs away from his face and Baekhyun smiled into the soft touch.

“Thank you, sir,” said Baekhyun.  Chanyeol gave him another kiss on the neck.   

“We’ll need to wash these sheets,” Chanyeol continued, “but first, a shower.”

Chanyeol got up and started the water while Baekhyun struggled to force himself off the bed with a yawn.  They cleaned off, periodically getting distracted by hugs and kisses in the warm water.  Chanyeol leaned against the tile wall with Baekhyun’s slippery chin on his chest.  Baekhyun closed his eyes and smiled softly. 

“I got you really worked up, didn’t I?” asked the younger man. 

Chanyeol just looked at him with a smirk.  “Yeah, you did, baby.  But don’t go getting any ideas.” 

Baekhyun giggled with a wink and kissed Chanyeol’s chest.  “Sure; I won’t.”

After their shower, they changed the dirty bed sheets.  Baekhyun belly-flopped onto the comforter the moment they were done and Chanyeol soon followed, allowing his boyfriend to wrap himself around him and nuzzle into his neck.  Baekhyun let out a happy peep. 

“You’re my giant teddy bear,” he said. 

Chanyeol couldn’t contain his smirk.  In a greasy voice, he remarked, “I hope you don’t do with your teddy bears what you just did with me.” 

Baekhyun opened his eyes and half-pretended to be scandalized.  He batted his hand playfully at Chanyeol’s cheek.

“Yeollie, why do you have to make everything so dirty!?”

Chanyeol cracked up and bugged his eyes at Baekhyun in indignation.  “Why do _I_ make everything dirty?  Have you listened to yourself for the past hour?  You sounded like you were in a porno!”  Chanyeol made an ungodly moaning sound in imitation of Baekhyun, causing the younger man’s cheeks to break out scarlet.  “Oh, oh, please, sir.  Ah, I need it, please, ahhhhh.”  Chanyeol couldn’t get enough of teasing Baekhyun through his innocent act. 

Baekhyun elbowed Chanyeol in the ribs with a stiff pout, causing Chanyeol to double over in faked pain. 

“Well, I’m sorry, but who’s fault is that?” asked Baekhyun, avoiding eye contact with his boyfriend.  Chanyeol narrowed his gaze and slid his arms around the smaller man. 

“You’re right,” he cooed, “you couldn’t help it; I’m too good.”

Baekhyun sputtered.  “Sure, keep flattering yourself.”  He rolled his eyes. 

“You know what, I will!” Chanyeol retorted, then added playfully, “why don’t you just pipe down and go to sleep, huh?”

“Yes, sir,” said Baekhyun with an amused grin, curling up farther into Chanyeol’s warm torso as Chanyeol planted a kiss on his scalp. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next update might take longer bc I'm still writing. Thank you for your patience :)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I am back! As usual, college and tennis season is a bitch but I am plugging away lmao. Enjoy this chapter! Also, more backstory is on its way do not fret :)

Well here it was: graduation! It was the day Baekhyun had been working towards since his innocent six-year-old self was sent to 1st grade without a clue of what awaited him. It was the day he had dreamed of when he awoke at five in the morning to take a day-long college entrance exam, so tired he barely registered the fourth years banging pans at him in encouragement.

He was done. He had lived through the emotional disaster that was college and he'd come out with a solid group of friends and a magnificent boyfriend. Now all he had to do was walk in the gown.

He was thankful he had Chanyeol to move in with; some of his friends were moving back with their families (which was not desirable) and Baekhyun was WAY too poor to support living on his own.

Baekhyun took one last look at himself in the mirror before he left his old room. He wore a new brown herring-bone suit and a green tie. The suit actually fit him well because Chanyeol had taken him to a nice store and helped him pick it out for the occasion.

When he went downstairs, half his family was there and they were busy preparing a huge celebratory dinner. A few aunts and cousins cheered when they saw him descending the staircase. Baekhyun smiled his rectangular smile.

"Yay!" said Hajin, "you didn't flunk out!"

Baekhyun stuck his tongue out at his sister.

"Oh, my son," fawned Mrs. Byun as she scuttled towards Baekhyun, carrying his cap and gown, "you look so handsome and grown!" She brushed off Baekhyun's lapel (of what he didn't know) and adjusted his collar.

"When did you get this suit? It looks like it must have cost a fortune!"

Baekhyun blushed. "Chanyeol got it for me," he nearly whispered.

Mrs. Byun looked surprised for a moment, but covered the feeling with a smile.

"Well, that's very sweet," she remarked, "I almost hate to put the gown over it."

Baekhyun waved her off. "Ah, eomma, go ahead. I want to try it on."

The gown fit well and made Baekhyun's aunts coo in approval, then Baekhyun's father and uncle walked in as Mrs. Byun was busy pinning the cardboard cap into her son's long, hazelnut-dyed hair.

Baekhyun was not a huge fan of his uncle, especially because of his affinity for referring to him mockingly as "pretty boy."

"Look," said Mrs. Byun to the two intruders as she lifted her son's gown, "Baek-ah's new young man got him this suit for today."

Mr. Byun raised an eyebrow and looked at his brother skeptically.

"Make sure this Chanyeol fellow," he said to his son, "knows he can't buy you."

Baekhyun put his hands to his cheeks in exasperation. "Aaabujiiii," he whined.

His mother butted in again. "Well can we meet him today?"

"I'm sure you will," confirmed Baekhyun, "he's coming."

"Will I like him?" asked Mr. Byun.

"Oh, I'm sure you'll love him!"

"Almost as much as I loved the last idiot?"

"Dear!  Ah-ah!" scolded Mrs. Byun. Baekhyun was glad he didn't have to defend himself because he probably would have started crying. There was an awkward silence for a moment before his uncle spoke up. If there was anyone more different from Baekhyun, it was his uncle (he was a wrestling coach from the suburbs who relished using his wrestling skills to take down Baekhyun's hapkido despite them being completely different disciplines).

"Are all your queer friends gonna be there?" asked his uncle. Baekhyun had to take a deep breath to stop himself from roundhouse-kicking the man right there (besides it would have ripped his new pants).

"Yes," he said measuredly, "a lot of them are graduating. The rest will be there to support."

"Do they all dress like this?" pressed his uncle, gesturing towards Baekhyun's outfit.

Mr. Byun glanced sideways at his brother.

"Okay, that's enough," he chastised.

"I'm just saying," explained Baekhyun's uncle, still thinking he was being funny, "the kid doesn't have to advertise it," then he put a hand on Baekhyun's shoulder. Baekhyun hated that his uncle was taller.  Then again, a lot of people were taller than him. 

"Listen, Baek, all that aside, I am proud of you. I hope you know that."

With that, Mr. Byun led his brother back to where they came from before he could ruin Baekhyun's day.

"Aigoo, tsk, tsk," said Mrs. Byun, shaking her head. Baekhyun decided he wanted to mess with his uncle. Before the large man could get to the other room, Baekhyun yelled, "yah! Ajeossi! Why don't you help the women in the kitchen? I'm sure they'd be thankful." He smiled sweetly as he spoke, acting as if he didn't know how his uncle would react. The target of Baekhyun's taunt turned around slowly.

"I don't cook," he said, "but maybe pretty boy could help, ah? You'd look at home over there."

The two Byun men stared each other down for a few moments, then the larger burst into laughter.

"Ah, you’ve always had a good spirit, Baek! Have fun today, yah?"

Baekhyun just stood there in irritation that he had let his uncle get the last word. He crossed his arms. His mother placed her hands on his shoulder.

"Oh, son, you know he's just a tease right?"

"It's okay, eomma," said Baekhyun with a sly smile and determined eyes, "I'll wait until he's not looking and chop him in the back!"

Baekhyun looked into the kitchen. There was steam everywhere and it smelled amazing. On the counter sat a lineup of raw meat and vegetables. Hajin was skittering about, taste-testing and commenting on each dish's progress when, all of a sudden, she wheeled around to face the door.

"Joongi oppa!" she yelled, crashing towards the entryway.

Baekhyun turned in unison with his mother. His brother stood in the open doorway in a black suit, his hair cut short for the military. He smiled wide and picked Hajin up into a hug, laughing.

"Aish, you're so heavy now!"

Mrs. Byun was almost crying. She scuttled over to her oldest son and squeezed him tight.

"Hi eomma," said Joongi, kissing his mother's cheek. Then he looked out at Baekhyun.

"There's the special guy!" he said with a grin. Joongi bear-hugged his brother.

"Hi, oppa," muttered Baekhyun into his brother's jacket.

They pulled apart as their mother was called into the kitchen to prevent a pot from boiling over.

"You look incredible, Baek-ah!" Joongi observed, making his brother laugh shyly.

"Thanks, Joon. Your hair is so short."

"I know," said the older man, "it's fuzzy; I kind of like it." 

Both men were quiet for a moment, smiling softly at the warm light in the house. 

“Are you doing alright in the military, oppa?” asked Baekhyun, breaking the stillness. 

Joongi looked at his shoes for a moment, then back at his little brother. 

“Yeah, I am,” he said.  “The guys in my regiment are nice, so that makes things smooth.  It’s a lot of hard work, but I’m plenty strong.” With this, Baekhyun’s brother made a very dorky show of flexing his arms.  Even still, it was hard to see anything under his suit sleeves. Baekhyun laughed at the display. 

“You, on the other hand,” jested Joongi, slapping his brother on the back “need to hit the gym – prepare a little.” 

Baekhyun laughed again, walking farther into the house, Joongi’s arm around him.  “I’ll be sure to do that. Joon-ah, are you still seeing Eunah?” 

Joongi smiled breathily.  “Yes.” 

Baekhyun smiled back.  “I’m glad. I like her.” 

“In fact,” Joongi continued, “she wanted to come but couldn’t get her shift covered.”

“Oh, it’s no problem,” assured Baekhyun. 

“But Baeekkkk,” began Joongi.

“Huh?”

“I hear you’re seeing someone.  I heard he’s a very respectable, wealthy young man.”

“Is that what you’ve heard?  Well, he is.”

“You’re blushing, Baek.  You must be really head over heels, huh?” 

Baekhyun breathed a laugh.  “I am,” he practically whispered. 

“I’m so glad.  Hey listen, is your ex graduating today too?” 

Baekhyun laughed again, sharply this time.  “Yes he is. Unfortunately they didn’t flunk him.” 

“Can I kick his ass for you?”

“As much as I’d like to see that, I don’t think it’s a great idea.” 

“Okay.  Can I boo him?”

“Knock yourself out.”  Baekhyun smiled. Joongi smiled too.  They burst out laughing after a moment and ended up hugging again. 

“What’s so funny?” asked Hajin, sidling up to her brothers. 

“Oh nothing,” replied Baekhyun, happy tears almost making a mess of his eyeliner, “will you make sure Joongi gets to say hi to everyone?” 

***

Baekhyun practically leapt from his plastic chair once the ceremony finished, nearly four hours after it had started.  The graduates were seated by last name, so he had to search through the shifting crowd of black gowns before he found his fellow graduate in the Kim section. 

“Jongdae!!!” exclaimed Baekhyun. 

“Eeeeyyyyy!!!”

They ran together and hugged so aggressively they almost knocked each other over.  They broke apart finally, only to scream at each other with wide, round faces. 

“What is this?” demanded Baekhyun in disbelief, pointing to his diploma. 

“That’s fucking proof you graduated, man!” Jongdae replied.  “We did it!” 

The two grabbed hands and bounded through the field, finding their friends in the audience.  Kris and Zitao seemed to be arguing about something, Minseok and Luhan were shimmying in excitement, Jongin was yelling congratulations, Kyungsoo was shuffling back and forth, his face completely dead-pan, and Sehun and Yixing smiled simply, clapping. 

“Where’s Junmyeon?” asked Baekhyun, but before anyone could answer, something was shouting and grabbing him from behind. 

“Surprise!” yelled Junmyeon as both Baekhyun and Jongdae turned around, shrieking and wide-eyed. 

“I got you!” said Junmyeon, obviously pleased.  “Congratulations, boys. You’re men now. Good work.”  And with that, he slapped them on the back. 

“Aish,” said Baekhyun, his lips twitching into a pout, “you sound like my dad.” 

Jongdae pointed at Kyungsoo, who was still shuffle-dancing.  “What is this?”

“It’s my festive dance,” replied the smaller man, face still serious as death. 

“Isn’t he cute?” prompted Jongin.  Kyungsoo finally smiled as if to prove his boyfriend’s statement. 

“Hey!” said Junmyeon, “group hug!” 

Sehun, Minseok, and Luhan were the first to join the embrace. 

“Ya!  Kris! Zitao!  Get over here!” 

“Ah,” yelled Zitao once in the hug, “something’s poking me!” 

Baekhyun whipped out his best mocking voice.  “Euhhh, something’s poking meee!” he parroted, only to be met with Zitao’s elbow in his ribs.  “Ow! Hey!” 

“Congratulations on three, okay?” bellowed Kris, “One, two, three –”

“Congratulations!!!” everyone yelled, bouncing in a giant hug. 

“Way to not fail!” said Minseok. 

“Yeah,” added Luhan, “we didn’t think you’d make it.” 

“Seokkie,” said Baekhyun, struggling for air, “you were my tutor so if I’d failed you would have shared the blame.” 

“Did you hear us booing the asshole?” asked Kyungsoo gleefully.

“Yes I did,” assured Baekhyun, “and I greatly appreciated it.” 

“This will be a bunch of you next year, huh?” said Jongdae.

“Can we stop the hug now?” asked Sehun.  “Kris is crushing me.” 

“Fine, fine.” 

“Ey, Baek, can we get you drunk tonight?” asked Zitao. 

“Yeah,” added Yixing “can we party at your grandma’s house tonight?  You promised you’d take me.” 

Baekhyun just shook his head and laughed.  “I still don’t get that joke. Anyway, I don’t think so.  I have a family-only party and then I’m going over to see Chanyeol.  In fact,” said Baekhyun, catching sight of the tall man in the crowd, “I see him now.” 

“Oh, I see how it is,” teased Sehun as Baekhyun left.  “We love you too! Congrats, hyung!” 

Baekhyun reached Chanyeol and noticed the bouquet of roses in his hand. 

“Are those for me?” he asked.

Chanyeol laughed.  “What do you think?” 

Baekhyun grinned and took the flowers, falling into his boyfriend’s arms.  They hadn’t seen each other yet. Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun on the top of the head.  When they pulled back, Baekhyun bared his teeth in a jittery smile and held out his diploma. 

“Look at this!” 

Chanyeol practically glowed through his navy suit.  “I’m so, so proud of you, Baek.” 

Baekhyun giggled.  “Thank you Yeollie, and thanks for coming.”

“Of course.”  Chanyeol tucked a strand of hair behind Baekhyun’s ear, then let his hand linger at the smaller man’s cheek. “You look very handsome, darling.” 

Baekhyun’s cheeks flushed at the compliment.  “Thanks to you.” 

“How about a kiss?”

“Sure,” said Baekhyun, “but just a small one.  I don’t want to make a gay spectacle right now.” 

And they kissed, just long enough to make them want more.  Baekhyun stood on his tiptoes and when they pulled away, they were holding hands. 

“Don’t worry, when you come over tonight I’ll make sure it’s a gay spectacle if I’ve ever seen one,” teased Chanyeol with a wink. 

“Channie, stop it,” said Baekhyun, clearly loving it.  He was quiet for a moment, calm. “You have to go soon, right?”

“Yeah,” said Chanyeol, looking at the ground and kicking an imaginary rock.  “I have to get back to the office or my uncle will kill me.” 

“Thanks again for the flowers,” said Baekhyun, hugging the taller man, “and for coming.  I love you.” 

“I love you too,” said Chanyeol, ruffling Baekhyun’s hair.  “See you tonight.” 

Chanyeol was about to turn to go when Baekhyun interrupted him.  “Wait a second!” he said, and Chanyeol wheeled around. “I told my parents they could meet you.  I almost forgot. They’re coming this way, so could you stay for like five minutes?” 

Chanyeol smiled.  “I’d love to.”

The Byuns made their way over the grass, the late-afternoon sun casting a warm haze over everything around them.

At first, they didn’t give Chanyeol more than a glance.  Mrs. Byun was crying and Hajin kept pulling at her skirt whining for her to calm down.  She threw her arms around her son and rocked him back and forth. 

“Ah,” said Baekhyun, flustered, “hi eomma.” 

He patted her back as Mr. Byun slapped his, making Baekhyun wince. 

“Your mother and I are very proud,” he said.

Baekhyun hugged each of his siblings, lifting Hajin and allowing Joongi to lift him briefly.       

After a few more moments of family sentimentality, the Byuns turned their attention to Chanyeol.  They all had to look up. Hajin was the first to say anything, she barged out from behind her parents and bowed, loudly declaring, “Hi, Chanyeol-ssi, I’ve heard a lot about you and I think you sound pretty cool!  Wah, you’re tall, aren’t you? I’m Baekhyun’s sister and honestly I’m just impressed you don’t find him awfully irritating – I wouldn’t blame you –”

“Okay enough, young lady!” blurted Mr. and Mrs. Byun in unison and their daughter immediately got quiet.  Baekhyun smiled and shoved her with his leg. She smiled and elbowed him back. Joongi gave them a sly look to cut it out.  The rest of the Byuns introduced themselves in turn and shook hands with Chanyeol. Both Joongi and Mrs. Byun smiled, obviously charmed.  Baekhyun’s father on the other hand, seemed less positive. He maintained a forced smile nonetheless. 

“I would just like to say thank you for taking him in now,” said Mrs. Byun, “We’ve always offered for him to come home after graduation but he’s always refused, so it’s a wonder you came along!” 

“Yes,” added Mr. Byun, “I trust you love him very much to do such a thing.”  He looked sideways at his son. Baekhyun thought his dad was skeptical about his boyfriend-selecting track-record.   

“I do,” confirmed Chanyeol, “very much.  You all must be very proud.” 

They responded in the affirmative, save Hajin, who shrugged dramatically. 

Joongi threw his arm around his brother’s shoulder.  “He’s the best little brother a man could ask for. I’m happy for him.  Happy for you guys.” 

Baekhyun smiled shyly, then interjected that Chanyeol needed to get back to work.  His family saw Chanyeol off politely. 

“I’m really glad I got to meet you,” said Chanyeol as he bowed and left. 

Baekhyun kept looking back at his boyfriend as he walked away with his family, and Chanyeol couldn’t help hearing the Byun’s conversation over his shoulder.  (“I like him,” said Mrs. Byun, “those flowers are simply exquisite.” Then Mr. Byun: “Well, you’ve certainly made an upgrade, son.”) Both men smiled to themselves.

***

Baekhyun’s party was over and he retired to his room, stuffed with food and sprawled out on his bed.  It was the first privacy he’d had since about noon and it was nearly eight at night. He looked over at his armchair, on which he had flung the black drape of his cap and gown along with his suit jacket and tie.  They looked like a deflated heap, not as bright as earlier. He looked back up at his ceiling where the blades of a fan rotated lazily, jiggling a metal switch like a cat toy in the air. When he sighed and closed his eyes, he still felt like he could make-out the blades in hazy black on his vision, cutting against the grainy red on the inside of his eyelids. 

The dinner had been fun.  Exhausting, but fun. He steered clear of his uncle as best he could, and most of the family fawned over him, too distracted by food, drink, music, and his siblings to cause any family-gathering-type drama.  On the way home, Hajin had her ear grabbed by her dad (the way Kyungsoo sometimes did to Baekhyun) while being scolded not to act like a brat in front of Baekhyun’s boyfriend. Baekhyun and Joongi both did their best to reassure him (“that’s just how she is, appa, most people think it’s endearing”).

Next, in the car, he turned his attention to Baekhyun: “I see you’re never going to learn to support yourself, huh?  Always going to rely on others? Never going to be an adult?”

Joongi looked askance at his father.  “Abuji! What has gotten into you? This is just how things worked out.  It’s not like Baekhyun’s using Chanyeol for his money! Besides – you should be happy you don’t have to pay for him.” 

After that, Mr. Byun seemed to realize he was being ridiculous on a day when he should be celebrating, because at the party, he hugged Baekhyun over and over and paraded him around, bragging about how his son would be the “next Mozart.”  When Baekhyun pointed out he’d probably just end up teaching, his father amended his statement to, “my son will _teach_ the next Mozart!” 

At this point, only stragglers were left.  Baekhyun’s aunt was still tipsy and he could hear his parents downstairs, trying to escort her out.  Some of the soberer leftovers were probably busy cleaning dishes, from the sound of banging metal, and would be rewarded with hefty Tupperwares of food.  Baekhyun had been exempted from clean-up duty for once – graduate privilege – so he could go upstairs and collect himself and his things. He was going to pack tonight, go celebrate with Chanyeol, then Chanyeol would come help move all his stuff the next day. 

Baekhyun opened his eyes and got up to change into a t-shirt and jeans.  When he was in jeans and straightening out his shirt, unclothed on top, he thought he heard a tap on his window.  He ignored it, figuring it was just the tree outside being knocked about in the breeze, but then it happened again, louder this time.  He wheeled around to face the window and nearly shrieked as his whole body vibrated in shock. Kyungsoo was sitting at his window, bugged eyes communicating, ‘let me in!’

Baekhyun hastily pulled his shirt on and opened his window.

“Kyungsoo-yah?  What the fuck are you doing here?”

Kyungsoo smiled and whistled as he climbed into the room.  Baekhyun was further befuddled when he watched Jongin climb in behind, followed by Sehun, and before Baekhyun knew it, all his friends were packed into his room.

“How did you get up here?” Baekhyun whisper-yelled.

“Believe it or not, hyung” said Sehun, “you have lattice on the side of your house.”

“Aigoo, careful!” warned Baekhyun, having a mini heart attack as Kris almost hit his head on the ceiling fan.  Zitao, Jongdae, and Yixing all sat down on the bed. Junmyeon and Kris wandered around, looking through Baekhyun’s stuff.  Luhan made his way to the armchair, picking up Baekhyun’s tie and reading the back label.

“Gucci,” he said, an impressed eyebrow upturned. 

“Yah, put that down!” said Baekhyun, increasingly disturbed by the clown-car situation assaulting his room.  “You can’t just go around acting like a peeping Tom!”

“Oh please,” countered Kyungsoo with a smile, “we’ve all seen you walking naked around your dorm, that was nothing. 

“Whatever.  Why are you in my room?”

Minseok spoke up.  “We’re taking Jongdae out to get drunk tonight,” Jongdae smiled at this like the Cheshire Cat, “and since you can’t come with us,” Minseok made a tssk-tssk sound at this, “we figured we’d pregame here and bring the party to you.”  He pulled a bottle of Champagne out of his bag and smirked. 

Baekhyun’s eyes went wide, feeling for the first time in his life like the protagonist of a wild high school movie. 

“But I have to pack!” he protested, “and I’ll get drunk off that in two seconds!  Also what are my parents going to say?” 

“Baekhyun, you’re an adult,” said Kris, matter-of-factly, leaning against the closet. 

Jongin jumped in.  “Besides, we won’t let you have very much.” 

Baekhyun sighed and laughed.  He had been a mood maker in the group until recently and would have loved something like this.  It was true he needed to lighten up a little, he thought. 

“Alright,” he said, and everyone responded with a solid “Yes!” “but do not distract me too much from packing!” 

“Yessir!” Said Jongdae, uncorking the champagne with a bang which made everyone jump out of their bones – especially Baekhyun and Kris.  Some of the liquid spilled onto the floor. 

“Fucking A.  Now I have to clean that,” complained Baekhyun. 

“I don’t think we thought this through,” declared Zitao.  Yixing looked at him questioningly. “We didn’t bring cups.” 

Luhan pouted.  “Well shit, I guess we’ll have to drink out of the bottle.” 

At that moment, there were three sharp knocks on the door and everyone froze. 

“Uh, yes?” said Baekhyun with caution, trying to avoid the dampening carpet. 

“I’m coming in,” said his mother’s voice.  Baekhyun tried to protest.

“UM –” but it was too late.  Mrs. Byun surveyed the room as Baekhyun’s friends tried to charm their way out of the situation with smiles.  To everyone’s surprise, a smile slowly spread to her face as well. 

“Uh-huh,” she said, hands on her hips, “just as I suspected.  Hello boys. Did I hear something about needing glasses?”

Yixing looked around in shock.  “Um yes? Thank you.” 

“And how about a bring you boys some food, huh?”

“Thank you so much, Mrs. Byun,” said Minseok with a tiny bow. 

She hugged Baekhyun as she smiled excitedly and hurried downstairs.  Baekhyun turned back to his friends and shrugged, making a face, and everyone laughed. 

The party continued with the door open.  They ate and drank and reminisced about Baekhyun and Jongdae’s stupidest college escapades.  Minseok and Junmyeon brought up the time they were pranked into bobbing for apples in the freshman dorm men’s-room toilets for entrance into a made-up club they were told would get to be backup dancers for SHINee.      

“Did that really happen?” asked Sehun in disbelief as Zitao mouthed “idiots.”  Baekhyun nodded. 

“Woulda been worth it,” he said, eating cake even though he wasn’t hungry and sipping his champagne as if it were thick medicine.

“I’ll bet you my inheritance they’re all gay,” said Jongdae, “and if not, Id’a turned ‘em!”           

At that, Mr. Byun walked by, stopped briefly to cast a judgmental glare into the room, then moved on.  Everyone burst into laughter. 

Once the boys were ready and the party over (for Baekhyun anyway) they left, this time through the front door.  They hugged Baekhyun one by one as he urged them to be safe. 

“Mrs. Byun,” remarked Jongdae, “you’re a cool mom.”     

Baekhyun went back upstairs to finish packing – he had not been very productive.  When he entered his room, he felt the summer night breeze trailing in through his still-open window.  It reminded him of summers past, spent lying in this familiar room with neighborhood friends, reading books in corners, dreaming about the future at his windowsill, learning piano in the cramped area next to his bed on an electric keyboard, jumping around and screaming the lyrics to loneliness anthems. 

He packed much of his clothing, then moved onto boxes of random shit he had hoarded.  He came across a note Yixing had sticky-ed to the inside of their dorm door the year before: 

_ Hey, Baek-ah.  I know it’s really tough right now and you don’t want to talk much, but I want you to know I’ll be there if you need it.  I know you can get through this. Nothing lasts forever. Please keep hope, okay? :) – zyx _

Baekhyun felt tears welling in his eyes.  He remembered reading that for the first time.  He remembered wanting to reach out to his roommate, but not knowing how.  He remembered taking the note and disappearing for the night on a walk through the city, until the police showed up.  He had left his phone in the dorm and when he got back to it, it was flooded by Yixing’s messages. He had felt guilty and curled up on his bed. 

Baekhyun whispered a quiet “I’m sorry,” and pursed his lips slowly into a smile.  A choked laugh escaped his throat as he wiped at the insides of his eyes. If only himself from that night had known how right Yixing was – how hopeful everything would soon seem.  Baekhyun dropped the note into the top of a box as he heard the honk of Chanyeol’s Mercedes in the driveway. He hadn’t finished packing all the way.  _ Darn _ , he thought,  _ I’ll have to get Chanyeol to help me tomorrow _ .      

“Hyunnie!” called Mrs. Byun from downstairs, “that’s your cue!” 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so originally I was gonna have this chapter be an angsty backstory thing with H but I decided to make that be chapter 14. Enjoy this cuteness and mild angst instead! Also, I'm done with school now so hopefully I'll have more time to write rip no promises. Also I apologize if I screwed up the video game references I did do a bit of research but unlike my ult bias, I have never played a video game in my life...

Chanyeol got home very late one night – around midnight.  He had a long argument about shipping monopolies with his uncle after already having more work than usual.  When he walked in the door, he saw Baekhyun sitting on the couch playing League of Legends, the computer hooked up to the TV. 

“Sorry I’m so late, babe,” he said, walking over to his boyfriend to give him a hello kiss. 

Instead though, he ended up laughing at the sight in front of him.  Baekhyun was asleep, huddled in a red sweatshirt with his mouth hanging open and his hands barely supporting the controller as his character stalled on the screen, taking blows from other players.  Chanyeol had originally intended to relieve his pent-up stress with a strong alcoholic beverage, but at this image, he thought he had a better idea. So, he snuck off to slip into his pajamas and came back, situating himself cross-legged on the floor below Baekhyun, between the younger man’s legs.  Then he plucked the controller from his boyfriend’s hands, careful not to disturb him, and turned the sound on the TV way down. He was not the League of Legends master that Baekhyun was, but him at the controls would at least be better than the avatar just sitting there inactive. 

After about twenty minutes, Chanyeol felt Baekhyun’s legs stirring and heard a yawn from behind him. 

“You awake, babe?” he asked, still focused on the screen. 

Baekhyun slipped his hands down to massage Chanyeol’s scalp and neck.  “Mm-hm. You’re doing pretty well, Yeollie. How long have I been asleep?”

“I don’t know.  You were when I got home though.”

“Watch out!” exclaimed Baekhyun as another player attempted to take a gnarly looking weapon to Chanyeol’s head.  Chanyeol dodged the danger with ease. “Was work okay?” 

Chanyeol heaved a sigh.  “My uncle is being frustrating.” 

Baekhyun gave a pout of sympathy, then bent over Chanyeol’s head and grabbed his cheeks, kissing him upside-down.

“I’m sorry, Yeol.  You don’t have to deal with him for now, at least.” 

“True,” agreed Chanyeol, “now you should move if you don’t want me to die and ruin your score.” 

Baekhyun knew Chanyeol didn’t really want him to go anywhere.  He smiled and rubbed his nose against his boyfriend’s, gazing into Chanyeol’s eyes. 

“It’s okay,” he assured in his sugary-est voice, “I’ll just beat it next time,” and he closed the gap between their faces for another soft kiss.  Sure enough, after several seconds, they were startled by the electronic sound of failure emanating from the screen. Baekhyun leaned back onto the couch, but kept his hands locked in Chanyeol’s hair, playing reassuringly with the strands around the larger man’s ears. 

“Game over!” declared Chanyeol, turning off the TV and standing to stretch, “time for bed?”

“Yeah.” 

They curled up in bed together like they always did and Baekhyun let out his pre-slumber squeak.  Myongryong padded into the room and hopped onto the bed, curling up in the curve of Baekhyun’s thigh. 

“There you are, boy,” said Chanyeol, reaching down to pet the new puppy, who let out his own contented squeak.  This only made Chanyeol more convinced that his boyfriend must have been a puppy in a past life.

***

Baekhyun opened his eyes.  He didn’t know how long he had been asleep, but the room was still awash in pale darkness and it seemed like neither Chanyeol nor Myongryong had moved since Baekhyun dozed off, although Baekhyun had managed to shift around so that he was on his back now. 

Pretty quickly, Baekhyun knew what was happening.  His eyes fluttered over shadows as he tried desperately to move his body, but to no avail.  A vague and dark apparition began to form at the foot of the bed, and Baekhyun watched in terror, unable to force any sound from his mouth besides a muffled moaning.  This was the first time he had experienced sleep paralysis since he moved in with Chanyeol. He thought that maybe sleeping in his boyfriend’s arms every night would cure it, but apparently not.    

The apparition kept growing, it looked like a black, wispy thumb, and it began to form little grey holes for eyes which just stared hollowly up at Baekhyun.  Baekhyun shivered in fear, but still could not move otherwise as the figure grew arms and used them to hike itself up and crawl over Baekhyun’s body. It had several limbs, which it used to steady itself over the bed while simultaneously pressing down on his chest.  Baekhyun hyperventilated as his eyes darted between the creature’s eyes and hands on his body. He could feel the pressure making it harder to breathe and he prayed he would make some sound loud enough for Chanyeol to hear. He couldn’t move his head, but he finally felt something in his throat hitch, and he yelled.  It was almost a scream, and it was certainly enough to make Myongryong hop up and start barking and to shake Chanyeol from his sleep. 

Chanyeol awoke, startled and looking around frantically.  His eyes followed Baekhyun’s up to where the terror would be if Chanyeol could have seen it.  Chanyeol caught on quickly once he was out of his confused stupor: He remembered Baekhyun telling him this might happen and what to do about it. 

_It’s not real, it’s not real.  It’ll go away. Breathe_ , thought Baekhyun, _think about love, that’s what the doctor said didn’t she?_  As if on cue, Chanyeol began petting Baekhyun’s bangs in a calming motion and kissing his face, whispering “breathe, Baek.  It’s okay. I’m here. I have you…” he wrapped his arms around Baekhyun and continued, “I’m right here. Focus on me.” 

Chanyeol’s sturdy body got in between Baekhyun and the monster, obscuring it and making it seem less real.  Baekhyun’s breathing began to calm and he regained control of parts of his body. He scrunched his toes, hands, and face and watched as the strange disturbance disbanded into little wisps of black just as quickly as it had formed.  Baekhyun lay there, slowly relaxing and whimpering breathes. 

Chanyeol held Baekhyun’s hands and pressed kissed onto them.  “Shh, shh,” he cooed, “you okay, baby?”

Baekhyun gulped, then sighed heavily.  He nodded. “Yeah. I’m okay now.” 

Chanyeol gazed at his boyfriend with doe eyes.  “Yeah? Was it sleep paralysis?” 

Baekhyun nodded again.  Chanyeol kept eye contact while he kissed Baekhyun’s knuckles. 

“Did I help okay?”

Baekhyun looked sweetly at his boyfriend.  “Yes, Yeollie. Thank you. I love you. Sorry for waking you up.”   

“I love you too,” said Chanyeol with a grin, “don’t apologize.  Goodnight again, darling.” 

“Goodnight.”  And they snuggled up together once more. 

Baekhyun had suffered the strange sleeping condition since he could remember, and had been attacked by every species of his imaginary tormentors.  The attacks weren’t frequent though, until he became afraid of H. Then they began happening much more often. There were nights when Yixing would wake to the sound of Baekhyun shrieking in their dorm and call the nurse in fright because he didn’t know what else to do.  With Chanyeol though, Baekhyun had something to distract him. He could tell this wouldn’t be a common occurrence. 

The next morning, Baekhyun was half awake and having strange dreams about dark figures looming in his room, while another part of his brain was aware of Chanyeol awake and putzing around the bedroom.  Light burned through Baekhyun’s closed eyelids and he felt Chanyeol lean over him and kiss his forehead. 

“Wakey, wakey, sleeping beauty,” he drawled. 

Baekhyun just groaned and stirred a bit, but refused to move much.  Chanyeol was not deterred though; he knew exactly how to wake his boyfriend.  He kissed Baekhyun’s nose, his lips, his chin, his Adam’s apple, then trailed soft kisses down his chest and abdomen, making Baekhyun squirm, but not completely open his eyes.  Chanyeol stopped with one lingering kiss right above the waist of Baekhyun’s pants, on the smaller man’s happy trail. Baekhyun then felt Chanyeol lean away from him and stand. 

“Ah, stop being such a tease, Chanyeollie~”

“Aha,” said Chanyeol, “there’s my prince.”

“Mm, why are you like this?  You got me all riled up. You better do something about it or I’m going back to sleep,” whined Baekhyun, rolling over into his pillows and sheets. 

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I need a shower,” teased Chanyeol “I was hoping you’d take one with me, but if you insist on sleeping I guess I can’t –” 

“Ah, no!” interrupted Baekhyun, rolling sloppily out of bed, “I’m coming, wait up!”

Chanyeol laughed heartily as Baekhyun stumbled after him towards the bathroom. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello I am back. Y'all wanted some angsty backstory so here you go! Again, H sucks so be warned and also if self-harm is a trigger for you be careful! I'll try to post again soon. The next chapter should wrap it all up!

Baekhyun couldn’t rip his eyes from the floor.  When he got to his 4th year midterm vocal evaluation, there had only been one seat among his classmates in the waiting area which was open – the one next to H.  He didn’t want to stand conspicuously in the center of the hallway, so he took the seat begrudgingly, wondering if H had purposefully kept the seat open. This evaluation was a solo performance, but at last year’s duets final, he and H had sung together. 

Baekhyun’s feet wouldn’t stop fidgeting side to side.  He took long breaths to steady himself. _This seating arrangement is just what I need for my nerves_ , he thought sarcastically, and he thought he felt H smiling beside him and looking at him. _It’s just your imagination_.  Instead of focusing on H, Baekhyun forced his mind to the lyrics of the song on which he would be evaluated – one called “Really I Didn’t Know.”  H got called in, which helped with Baekhyun’s nerves. In what felt like both an eternity and an instant, Baekhyun heard his name, and went into the studio. 

The evaluation went pretty smoothly.  He had almost gone flat at one point, but saved the note just in time.  He could finally breathe. He also majorly had to pee. This always happened when he was nervous.  When he walked into the bathroom, he heard a faucet running, but thought nothing of it until he saw H’s face illuminated by the stark lighting over the sink mirror.   

“Hey, cutie,” he drawled, shaking his hands dry and running them through his hair while accosting Baekhyun through the mirror.  Baekhyun didn’t know what to do, so he opted to avert his eyes and focus on the urinal he desperately needed to use, assuming avoidance would be the easiest way to tire H of his game and get him to leave.  He knew the tactic might run the opposite risk though of also encouraging H to bother him more. Baekhyun heard the other man’s heel squeak as it turned on the linoleum floor and could practically feel him stalking closer. 

“How was the evaluation?”

“Good,” responded Baekhyun tersely, suddenly very interested in deciphering some message which had once been scrawled on the wall but was scratched out. 

“Good,” replied H as he loitered in the space behind Baekhyun, “so was mine.” 

“Baekkie,” H continued,

“Don’t call me that,” Baekhyun tried to warn as he made his way to the sink, but it was cut off by H barreling through whatever he was going to say. 

“When we sang our duet last year,”

“Yup,” said Baekhyun, drying his hands with his back to the other man and trying to sound as disinterested as possible.  This was not difficult. Once his paper towel hit the trash bin, he tried to make quick work of leaving. If he could just get out of there, even if H followed, it would be in public – safer.  H, however, was not having it. 

“Hey, hey, baby,” he said, smiling and hopping to cut off Baekhyun’s way out by placing himself in front of the door.  Baekhyun stopped and glared, mentally ticking off a tiny victory at the thinly-veiled panic in H’s eyes. “Where are you going?  Don’t you wanna talk?” H pressed Baekhyun back against the cool tile wall and Baekhyun locked his eyes onto a spot on the wall opposite him. 

“No, I really don’t,” he said, “and please stop with the pet-names.  We’re not dating anymore.” 

H took Baekhyun’s cheeks in one hand and squeezed a little.  Baekhyun frowned. He was getting scared. He wondered how many people would hear him if he screamed. 

“You just like to have me pining for you, don’t you?” asked H.  Baekhyun did not respond, although had he, he would have sounded like a child trying to do ‘chubby bunny.’  “You haven’t even hooked up with anyone since we broke up, have you? And that was months ago. I really ruined you, didn’t I?”  Despite the fear behind his eyes, H smirked and seemed to grow more confident with each word. He released his hold on Baekhyun’s face and bucked his knee up to press it painfully against Baekhyun’s crotch.  Baekhyun winced. 

“Fuck,” he cursed, his eyes squeezing shut.

H laughed at this and his eyes glittered as he leaned closer.  “You like that kind of stuff, huh Baek?” 

Baekhyun glared, trying to shimmy himself free with his shoulders.  “No, asshole, I don’t!” he practically shouted. He still had such a hard time understanding by what process this sadistic fuck had developed out of the charismatic boyfriend H was at first.  He knew deep down it had always been there, waiting to catch him in a spot of weakness, but would not have been an effective strategy to snare him in the first place. 

“Hm,” said H, eye trailing over Baekhyun’s lips ruefully, “do you remember our duet from last year?” he asked.  Baekhyun was silent again. H continued, knee trailing down Baekhyun’s inner thigh and making him nauseous; “we were so good, weren’t we?  A great team. I miss those days. Don’t you?” 

“I don’t miss it,” said Baekhyun, his breathing hitching and his voice faltering from defiant to sad.  He was so exhausted. He would do anything to leave. 

H appeared not to process his ex-boyfriend’s answer, he only continued staring at Baekhyun’s mouth.  “I miss your lips,” he confessed. “Kiss me once, Baek – for old time’s sake. I’ll let you go if you kiss me.” 

Baekhyun had no idea what was going on.  He didn’t know if H legitimately missed him and had feelings for him or if he just genuinely enjoyed terrorizing people.  H still held Baekhyun against the wall with his whole frame, leaning in slowly and letting his eyelids go slack. 

Something broke in Baekhyun’s throat and his eye twinkled in panic.  A countdown started in his mind: _I’m going to scream in 3…2…1…_

At that moment the door opened with a thud.  H paused less than a centimeter from Baekhyun’s face and quickly pushed their bodies apart, clearing his throat and shoving his hands into his pockets.  Baekhyun’s breathing went unsteady after he realized he had been holding it and he rolled against the wall in relief, barely noticing a very confused classmate passing between them and casting shifty glances around the room. 

The minute he could think again, Baekhyun focused all his energy into sprinting out the door.  He ran straight for his dorm and H did not follow, having sufficiently terrified Baekhyun for the day.  Instead he leaned against the wall outside the bathroom and watched Baekhyun run with a grin. 

Baekhyun crossed the threshold of his room walking quicker than he usually ran.  The door opened with a bang as everything he did seemed to occur with excess movement.  Yixing sat at his desk on the far end of the room and looked up from his homework, startled. 

“Fuck!” Baekhyun yelled. 

“What is it?” asked Yixing, voice soft but commanding, “did something happen with your eval?”  

“No, it’s my absurd fucking ex, that’s what,” Baekhyun answered, bangs flying in his face as he glided into the bathroom, slammed the door, and locked it.  “I’m going to kill him!”

He heard Yixing scrambling from his desk and watched as the door strained several times against his roommate’s tugs.  Baekhyun sat on the lidded toilet and tried to gather his breathing.

“Yixing,” he said, “I’m fine.  Can you give me some time in here?”  he asked.

“Baek –” Yixing began to protest, but Baekhyun cut him off. 

“Please?”  Baekhyun didn’t get an answer but the banging and tugging stopped so he figured he had some time.  He took a deep breath and clenched his fists. They were trembling to punch something – ideally H’s face. 

Baekhyun got up and stood at the sink, still wearing his blazer from the evaluation.  He picked up his razor unsteadily and began to shave sections of his face with soap. He barely had any facial hair to speak of and none of it had started growing back since he last shave several days ago, but the glide of cold metal on his skin was something he always found comforting.  The shitty LED lights in the bathroom made everything appear a sickly blue. 

Baekhyun stared deep into the mirror at himself and tried to stop the tears which pricked from behind his eyes.  He noticed sweat had started to bead at his hairline. _Fuck_ , he thought _, maybe H was right.  Maybe he did ruin me, or break something in me_.  It was true that Baekhyun was disgusted by the idea of hooking up ever since the relationship ended; he could barely even jack off.  The idea of being on the same campus as H turned him into a coil of anxiety and sometimes made it hard for him to focus. How could he focus when random ambushes like the one from earlier kept periodically occurring?  His student-health counselor had simply suggested he avoid H, but how do you avoid a heat-seeking missile? 

Baekhyun took the curve of his jaw too quickly and nicked himself.  He grimaced as he watched the blue-tinted crimson liquid roll down his neck.  He pressed a finger against it. It stung, but not much. Baekhyun closed his eyes and thumped his head against the wall.  He felt like he was in a bubble he couldn’t pop. He felt like something dirty was running through his veins – something he needed to get out if he wanted to stop feeling worthless.  He should have been celebrating passing one of his finals. How did H manage to get to him whenever he was feeling better about himself? 

Baekhyun sank back against the wall behind him, hitting the floor.  He held his razor and slowly removed one of the blades. 

“Baekhyun-ssi?” Yixing ventured from the other side of the door.  After Baekhyun failed to respond, he went back to banging several times on the wood.  “Fuck…”

Baekhyun dropped the plastic device against the floor and laid back, watching the sharp edge of the blade twinkle in the light.  It was almost like Baekhyun couldn’t feel the floor below him.

A few minutes later, Yixing, Junmyeon, and a security guard busted the door open to find Baekhyun on the floor.  He had one knee bent up and one sleeve rolled. His face was shiny from soap and slightly bloody and he had one hand over his chest with the rolled-sleeve arm draped out across the tiles.  It leaked crimson from several jagged lines on the wrist. Baekhyun’s eyes were glazed a ringed with tears. He had pieces of a razor next to him and was humming softly to himself. Yixing and Junmyeon let the security guard handle the situation, both too shocked to move, but later Junmyeon would identify the song as “Really, I Didn’t Know,” a popular assessment tune.                     

Baekhyun awoke the next morning in the school’s clinic.  It was not somewhere he had to go often, considering he was not particularly clumsy and most of the students who frequented the place were sports majors.  He would have thought he was in an actual hospital, had he not recognized the room from when Jongin pulled his leg muscle during a dance rehearsal. He looked around at the high ceilings and ample lighting; it was a nice room and it reminded him of a cathedral, just a lot less pretty.  He had a blanket over him with little roses printed on it. It was the kind of blanket flight-attendants gave you on long airplane rides. He had a bandage over his right wrist and at some point during the night, someone had brought him a tiny Winnie the Poo teddy bear. He finally noticed Yixing and Junmyeon sitting in the metal chairs at his bedside, breathing softly in sleep, and everything from the evening before came crashing back into his mind.   _ Shit… _

Baekhyun flexed his right hand.  Nothing hurt, but he sensed his muscles taking longer than usual to warm up and execute their movements.  After a few moments, Minseok walked in with three cups of steaming coffee. He smiled softly, pausing in momentary surprise. 

“Hey!” he said, placing his coffee on the bedside table a holding the other two under Yixing and Junmyeon’s noses.  The two men blinked and slowly shuffled into action. 

“You’re back,” said Yixing with a smile as he stretched. 

“Yeah,” said Baekhyun.  He sounded like he had swallowed shards of glass.  “I’m sorry you guys have to be here. Were you here all night?” 

Junmyeon took a sip of his coffee and waved him off.  “Yes, but don’t worry about it. We’re just glad you’re okay.” 

“You gave everyone a real scare,” said Minseok, sitting on the edge of the bed. 

“What happened?” Baekhyun asked, then amended his statement.  “Well, I know what happened but…you know what I mean.”

“Yeah we do,” said Junmyeon.  “Well basically you passed out from short-term blood loss and you’ve been here since about six p.m. last night.  All the guys have been by to see you, but most couldn’t stay.” 

Baekhyun looked at the teddy bear in his arms.  It had to be from Jongin. “Right, yeah, I get it.” 

Yixing spoke, “but you should have seen Zitao when he showed up, man.  He started crying. He thought you were gonna die. That dude really loves you even if he doesn’t show it.” 

Baekhyun just smiled guiltily, realizing he had just put his friends through the wringer.  “What time is it?” he asked. 

“About 11:30,” answered Minseok. 

Baekhyun looked shocked.  “Jesus, I was out forever.”

Minseok shrugged.  “Your body just needed some time to recover.  And obviously you have been excused from classes for the day.” 

Baekhyun nodded.  “Has my family been by?” 

Junmyeon shook his head.  “No. They know what happened, but they’ve been put on standby to be notified when you wake up.” 

Baekhyun winced.  Nothing hurt, but he couldn’t imagine facing his parents after all this.  “Fuck…”

“By the way, Baek,” Yixing began, “what  _ did _ happen?  Yesterday you burst into the room saying you were gonna kill your ex.” 

Baekhyun softly punched his right fist against his leg.  “I’m not gonna kill him…”

“We know that – obviously,” said Minseok, “but you did quite a number on yourself.”

“He just wants me to be miserable,” Baekhyun said.  Then he sighed. “He wants me to feel useless without him.  He keeps finding me. He ambushed me in the bathroom after my eval and tried to force me to kiss him.  It makes me feel so icky. I don’t want to go outside in case he sees me.” 

His three friends nodded solemnly.  Junmyeon sipped his coffee. It was a lot to process on so little sleep. 

Minseok tapped a finger against his cup.  “And the administration doesn’t want to do anything about it?”

“No.  Whenever I file a complaint they get all weird about it.  They don’t like acknowledging that anything gay goes on on campus, and even more ridiculously, they don’t like filing sexual assault reports because it could go public and make them look bad.  Also, he has perfect academic and police records and the admins are like, ‘oh why would we expel him and ruin the life of a promising young man? You can handle him for another semester, right?’  No – I don’t think I can!”

Everyone took a deep breath.  Baekhyun was wearing himself out just by ranting. 

“Okay,” said Yixing, gesturing to a bottle of water on Baekhyun’s side table, “why don’t you drink some of that?”  Baekhyun followed the suggestion. 

Junmyeon’s eyes caught something on the far end of the room.  “Baek, your family’s here,” he said, standing up, “we’ll let them see you alone.” 

“Okay,” he said softly as his friends filed past.  “Thanks again. I love you guys.” 

“Love you too. Hey, maybe we can start an expulsion petition on your behalf,” Yixing jested. 

Baekhyun laughed shallowly. He was terrified to face his family.  He took another gulp of water and closed his eyes, resolving to think of something, someday, which would get back at H. 

 


End file.
